Sexless Marriages

[LustyScribe]

Hard to believe, this thread is almost 3 years old and now 3,150 posts or eerily similar stories both for men and women. I wonder how many have found some form of relief? I may have, time will tell........

I have, Tango, but only because I've changed my way of thinking. I have had some enjoyable correspondence with others in the same boat thru this and a couple of similar threads. I write them (and me, of course) into erotic stories, which we share in PMs. I cater more to their desires/hot points than my own, but that is okay because I am primarily a "pleaser." Is it as good as IRL? No, but it is less troublesome and I DO get at least some intimate connection with another human being, which is a lot more than I get at home. And some are really awesome people.

 

[TemptationTango]

I have, Tango, but only because I've changed my way of thinking. I have had some enjoyable correspondence with others in the same boat thru this and a couple of similar threads. I write them (and me, of course) into erotic stories, which we share in PMs. I cater more to their desires/hot points than my own, but that is okay because I am primarily a "pleaser." Is it as good as IRL? No, but it is less troublesome and I DO get at least some intimate connection with another human being, which is a lot more than I get at home. And some are really awesome people.

This is interesting as I too have found a .....uhummm a...pen pal. It's almost like having someone pull off a blindfold just being able to talk about intimate things in explicit detail. Acting like a teenager oddly makes me feel more like a man. Years of repression shedding and falling off like an ice cube left in the sun....yes, an awakening. We have even discussed publishing on Lit.....I feel I owe Lit a payback. I went into this with no expectations and so far, I am really surprised at the results.

I kinda thought finding someone in the same boat would result in a tete a tete of a husband/wife bitch fest. It has been the opposite, we are focused on ourselves.....how selfish right? But, that is exactly what those here in this thread need after absorbing years or decades of rejection.

I have been bouncing in & out here on Lit for many years. I was tentative, shy, naive. But, the more I read, the more I wanted to at least try something different from what is obviously broken at home. This time here, I said, 'fuck it' and jumped in with both feet.

 

[AnnieLit]

This is interesting as I too have found a .....uhummm a...pen pal. It's almost like having someone pull off a blindfold just being able to talk about intimate things in explicit detail. Acting like a teenager oddly makes me feel more like a man. Years of repression shedding and falling off like an ice cube left in the sun....yes, an awakening. We have even discussed publishing on Lit.....I feel I owe Lit a payback. I went into this with no expectations and so far, I am really surprised at the results.

I kinda thought finding someone in the same boat would result in a tete a tete of a husband/wife bitch fest. It has been the opposite, we are focused on ourselves.....how selfish right? But, that is exactly what those here in this thread need after absorbing years or decades of rejection.

I have been bouncing in & out here on Lit for many years. I was tentative, shy, naive. But, the more I read, the more I wanted to at least try something different from what is obviously broken at home. This time here, I said, 'fuck it' and jumped in with both feet.

Good for you!
Co-writing for Lit is a great idea! If you both can write and your roleplaying does not look like a page from one side and three lines from another, then go for it!

 

[LustyScribe]

This is interesting as I too have found a .....uhummm a...pen pal. It's almost like having someone pull off a blindfold just being able to talk about intimate things in explicit detail. Acting like a teenager oddly makes me feel more like a man. Years of repression shedding and falling off like an ice cube left in the sun....yes, an awakening. We have even discussed publishing on Lit.....I feel I owe Lit a payback. I went into this with no expectations and so far, I am really surprised at the results.

I kinda thought finding someone in the same boat would result in a tete a tete of a husband/wife bitch fest. It has been the opposite, we are focused on ourselves.....how selfish right? But, that is exactly what those here in this thread need after absorbing years or decades of rejection.

I have been bouncing in & out here on Lit for many years. I was tentative, shy, naive. But, the more I read, the more I wanted to at least try something different from what is obviously broken at home. This time here, I said, 'fuck it' and jumped in with both feet.

"....I feel I owe Lit a payback." Exactly how I feel! I've enjoyed this site for so many years. And about 2 & a half years ago, I started wading deeper, and I have no regrets.

 

[English_guy_bkk]

I'm not counting but 11 May 2011, twas the day l went overseas to work. And yes, yes l wasn't at home but nothing since.

 

[Easyvirtue]

No Easter sex here! What ever! Same ole shit!

 

[Manny39]

Geez, I guess I don't feel so alone anymore. Although my marriage isn't completely sexless. We have, in the last 4 years been able to squeeze in about 3 times a year on average.

Porn, Literotica, and my own manual dexterity do help.

Thanks all,

Manny

 

[nbsucked]

I would love to find a pen pal to make up for all the sex I fantasize about and not get in a long time hehehe... but life moves on

 

[LustyScribe]

I would love to find a pen pal to make up for all the sex I fantasize about and not get in a long time hehehe... but life moves on

You never know. I didn't come here looking for that, but I've found it.

 

[Badvibez]

Hard to believe, this thread is almost 3 years old and now 3,150 posts or eerily similar stories both for men and women. I wonder how many have found some form of relief? I may have, time will tell........

As some find relief others find their way to this thread. Like me

 

[Badvibez]

If you find that connection with someone then online can be very fulfilling.

 

[Armyvet23]

Due to his medical ED issues, it's been 3-4 yrs for me

That's not healthy, it's been longer for me and I have found other ways to deal with it. PM me if you need an ear to chat with.

 

[Windman1]

This has been a process for me. Menopause has brought about a near sexless marriage as well as almost no touch or sign of affection at all. Its been an adjustment, we are a good fit in every other aspect of our marriage. after seeking other avenues of sexual release including writing stories here, those things only get me so far. It‘s not the same, its not physical touch.
Honestly at this point it seems a relationship outside of my marriage would be a benefit to it instead of a detriment. I think the resentment would go away if it wasn’t being fueled by a starved sexuality. I’m not wanting to unload her, I like her. Im just after some sexual satisfaction.

 

[Mtnmike]

This has been a process for me. Menopause has brought about a near sexless marriage as well as almost no touch or sign of affection at all. Its been an adjustment, we are a good fit in every other aspect of our marriage. after seeking other avenues of sexual release including writing stories here, those things only get me so far. It‘s not the same, its not physical touch.
Honestly at this point it seems a relationship outside of my marriage would be a benefit to it instead of a detriment. I think the resentment would go away if it wasn’t being fueled by a starved sexuality. I’m not wanting to unload her, I like her. Im just after some sexual satisfaction.

Aren't we all bro.

 

[Seadog777]

Anyone else with this problem?
I have a high sex drive and the wife doesn't.
Looking for others with this problem, and possibly helping fill our needs.

I'm in the same situation.
My wife has given me permission to seek a FWB.
I'm still looking for the right person to fill that role.

 

[Easyvirtue]

I have a unfullfilling sex life, averaging about 6 times a year I would guess, although we've have years with none.

Like many, it used to be good, but fertility issues sent us down a rabbit hole and then low self esteem on her part made things worse.

I have a high drive, and this is why I drfit in and out of Lit so mch. This is my fourth time coming back after leaving.

It is good to know you're not alone, that others have similar experiences, and I have shared some great online chats with people about this.

I’m here as well for the same reason. The past was quite exciting in our early years but she doesn’t understand at 50 I’m still as interested in sex as I was in my 20-30’s, and doesn’t understand how I’ve gotten more kinky. She’s tired, she’s out of shape, she doesn’t dress sexy, she wears big silk briefs now and Playtex big granny bras and isn’t even 50 yet. I’m into so much sexually now than ever so here I am reading LIT and “taking care of my own needs.”

 

[Shark9000]

Geez, I guess I don't feel so alone anymore. Although my marriage isn't completely sexless. We have, in the last 4 years been able to squeeze in about 3 times a year on average.

Porn, Literotica, and my own manual dexterity do help.

Thanks all,

Manny

3 times a year? I'd take 1 time every 2 years if I could. Been about 8 years since I got the bomb dropped on me that there just is no interest in sex for her.

good luck Manny... I hope your average goes up.

 

[LustyScribe]

Shark, it hasn't been as long for me - twice in the last 17 months - but I had that same bomb dropped on me last year. My attitude has become "If you're choosing not to be a part of my sex life, then you have no say whatsoever about my sex life." I'm over it. I love her, but she abandoned me, as far as I'm concerned. I'm getting old, but I'm not dead.

 

[Rob8822]

I'm in the same situation.
My wife has given me permission to seek a FWB.
I'm still looking for the right person to fill that role.

That is a real life issue for a lot of us guys!

 

[Lady2020]

Unasked for advice to men: try something different with your fantasy partner.

 

[Rob8822]

Unasked for advice to men: try something different with your fantasy partner.

Always ready for something different.

 

[Deadbed1968]

I’ve been married for 25 years to the most wonderful woman. We love each other very much and we make that known to each other every day. We enjoy spending time together and are still very affectionate to each other.

The only thing missing is physical intimacy. 5 times in the past 4 years is not enough. I feel terrible even asking for sex because I know she doesn’t feel comfortable and I’m not interested in a “pity fuck”. Interacting here on lit helps keep me sane!

 

[LustyScribe]

I’ve been married for 25 years to the most wonderful woman. We love each other very much and we make that known to each other every day. We enjoy spending time together and are still very affectionate to each other.

The only thing missing is physical intimacy. 5 times in the past 4 years is not enough. I feel terrible even asking for sex because I know she doesn’t feel comfortable and I’m not interested in a “pity fuck”. Interacting here on lit helps keep me sane!

Our situations are quite similar; 37+ years for me. She's been physically intimate with me twice in the last 18 months, and made sure I knew those were just her humoring me. Unfortunately, the attitude that has developed over time from her is just a compounding of that sentiment, and at this point both my desire for her and my love for her are dying off.
On the good side, I have made some good connections here, and had some fun. It keeps the wee embers of hope alive that just maybe one day I can experience passion and love again.

 

[Tribe77]

In my late 30s. My wife and I fucked like crazy the first few years. Now it's 3 times a year. She blames medication. Still very frustrating for me as I love her dearly and in no way want to cheat. The lack of sex is for sure an issue.

 

[Deadbed1968]

In my late 30s. My wife and I fucked like crazy the first few years. Now it's 3 times a year. She blames medication. Still very frustrating for me as I love her dearly and in no way want to cheat. The lack of sex is for sure an issue.

That is exactly how I feel. I love my wife more than life itself. I definitely do not want to cheat, so I find alternatives, such as interacting with people here, and reading the awesome stories. IDK what the future holds, but this provides some relief.