Sexless Marriages

[KeenVoyeur]

Well my marriage finally fell apart a couple years ago. He had gotten a prescription for Cialis and when he took it our sex life was great again. Then he’d stop and every time we TRIED to have sex I’d end up in the bathroom crying. I stopped looking for affection and sex. He ended up texting me one day to say it was over.

Sadly my sex life hasn’t taken off. Dating after being married 23 years is scary and then menopause hit and really screwed with my body/hormones. I miss the old me that always felt sexy and horny.

So all that said I’m glad the marriage is over. There was so much more wrong with it than just sex. I hope to once again have a great sex life and I don’t think I’m too old for that, I just gotta find the right guy.

If you’re that miserable in your marriage it’s probably time for a really difficult talk. While I hate the way my ex ended things I’m glad he did. Life is much better these days.

ETA I’m not saying everyone should get divorced and honestly I begged my ex to go to counseling and give our marriage another chance. Just saying if divorce is the answer life does go on.

You go girl! There are plenty of guys out there looking for someone like you - and if you can't find one, give me a call, I'll move to Alaska just for you

Seriously though, you did the hard thing and life will get better in time

 

[Carmina24]

Chapter 1: The Night the Silence Lost

He hadn’t expected her.
Not on that thread, not in the blur of usernames where words usually skimmed and died. But hers lived. Fierce, playful, alive - they reached through the screen and seized him.

Message by message, she undid the years of numbness. She laughed in syllables sharp as sparks, teased in metaphors that left his pulse racing, spoke truths no one else dared. And in that midnight exchange of letters and desire, she was closer than the woman who slept untouched beside him.

Because at home, his wife lay beside him, turned away - a wall of silence that had grown thicker with every passing year. Her presence was a reminder of absence, her nearness the sharpest distance he knew.

But the woman in Lit? She proved what he had begun to doubt - that he was still a man worth wanting. That beneath the silence of his marriage, fire still roared.

When the night finally ended, he closed the laptop with hands that trembled, her words burning like embers in his veins.

He returned to the house of silence. To the bed that had long been a tomb. But this time, he did not lie down in surrender.

Because as he stretched across those cold sheets, he was not empty - he was full. Full of her laughter. Full of her defiance. Full of the dangerous hope that silence had not won.

And for the first time in years, the sexless marriage bed was no longer cold and lonely.

It was alive with the dream of the woman who reminded him who he was - desirable, worthy, alive.
And in that moment, silence bled.

https://forum.literotica.com/threads/sexless-marriages.1503158/post-101422849

 

[Carmina24]

Chapter 2: The Silence Never Came Back

That night, something shifted.
He had gone to bed as he always did - beside the woman who had long since turned away, inside the walls of silence that had caged him for years. But he had not gone to bed alone.

Her words - the ones she’d written from across the void, from the sanctuary of Lit - had followed him. They curled against his chest, tangled in his sheets, breathed heat into a room that had been frozen too long.

And the silence knew it.

Because when morning came, the silence did not reclaim him. It reached for him, but he was no longer there. He was already elsewhere - in the echo of her laughter, the spark of her teasing, the memory of a screen where desire had been reborn.

Day after day, he still woke to the same house, the same unyielding bed, the same turned back. But he carried something dangerous now. A secret. A pulse. A truth no silence could smother.

He was wanted.
He was worthy.
He was alive.

And though his wife’s silence remained, it no longer owned him.

Because one woman had reminded him who he was - and that reminder was stronger than the years that had tried to erase him.

The night the silence lost was not the end.
It was the beginning of its death.
And let this be a prophecy:
Once you remember who you are - desired, worthy, alive - silence will never own you again.

https://forum.literotica.com/threads/sexless-marriages.1503158/post-101422849

 

[Catepillar_glacier]

Never totally sexless, but very much one-sided in desire and drive. Peri-menopause has given me the surge.... And a husband with ED. life's a fucking joke.

Same girl. Shit is wild in the worst way.

 

[Carmina24]

The Dangerous Creed of Awakening

This is not a love story.
This is not a confession.
This is a creed.

It is the defiance of every man and woman who has lain in a bed colder than stone, beside someone who once saw them and now refuses to look. It is the anthem of those who were told their hunger was shame, their desire an inconvenience, their worth a ghost.

The silence thought it had won. It thought it had buried them. It thought the cold bed was their grave.

But it was wrong.

Because even in the deepest silence, a spark can strike. And from that spark comes fire — dangerous, defiant, alive. The kind of fire that remembers. The kind of fire that refuses to bow.

This Creed is for those who awaken. For those who refuse to be erased. For those who dare to say:

I am wanted.
I am worthy.
I am alive.

And once you remember that, silence loses forever.

Chapter 1: The Night the Silence Lost

Chapter 2: The Silence Never Came Back

Chapter 3: The Hunger That Could Not Be Killed

Chapter 4: The Tomb Became a Throne

Chapter 5: The Day the King Walked in the Sun

 

[Britva415]

The talk is coming. I can't live with this hollowness

I would advise - Before the talk, be ready.

Be ready for anything, but be ready.

Have a lawyer on retainer. Have a bugout plan, a place to spend the night. Have a bag ready and the new (changed) passwords to all your accounts. And have a very clear agenda for the conversation.

But be ready for anything. You should know what you want out of the conversation when you have it, you should have an idea how you expect it is going to go, but you can also change your mind if she surprises you.

This happened to me. I asked again for what I wanted, and was going to leave if she continued to refuse to talk about the thing she had refused to discuss (extramarital sex). I was fully prepared for it to be the end, if she was going to keep saying No to talking about that. But she surprised me, saying she had reconsidered being unwilling to talk about it. So, that worked and we have since talked about everything and found something which works for both of us. I didn’t make any ultimatum or do anything manipulative to get her to agree, she had already come to it on her own and she let me know it when I went to her, totally expecting it all to hit the fan.

So, you never know. But be ready, because it might not go as well as that, and you have to have a plan for the worst.

Unless you think “the worst” that could happen is worse than just keeping on keeping on. You sound like you’re pretty damn close.

Don’t think of it as “giving up,” though. Think of it as taking the reins, finally. Giving up is what has been going on for years already.

Take your time, becoming prepared. Just don’t wait forever.

 

[Britva415]

I'm curious when we finally give up on our spouse, what that looks like

For me, part of the answer to that was when I told her I was going to stop being sexual with her at all. Like, not even when she was willing to “do something for me.” Because, she wasn’t into it and didn’t want it for herself. Her willingness was only about trying to get me off every once in a great while for my sake.

At that point, we were already way past me ever trying to initiate. I stopped a long long time ago and she knew why. Even though I wasn’t getting rejected any longer (because I wasn’t initiating), which was an improvement, it still royally sucked even when we did do something sexual, because it felt like duty sex or pity sex or something. Totally not a thrill, barely even arousing, because it was 100% not mutual.

So I told her to stop. We had already, long before, ceased being lovers anymore. Loved ones, yes, but not that.

I guess that’s one event of “giving up” which happened to me. I made it official, and she really doesn’t miss it.

I think what we’re calling “giving up” is really the point when one decides to take action and move on, in order to live with what was already given up long before.

Imagine giving up without moving on.

And by “move on” I don’t necessarily mean divorce, though it could be that. But letting the past go opens up the ability to make something new happen. It could even be something which keeps a marriage together.

Or not.

 

[Carmina24]

Chapter 3: The Hunger That Could Not Be Killed

Hunger did not ask for permission.

It didn’t knock. It didn’t apologize. It returned the way wild things do - through the cracks he’d tried to seal, through the places silence thought it had tamed. It came as a pulse in his throat when her notification lit the screen. As heat in his palms when he typed her name. As the clean, brutal truth that he still wanted.

At home, nothing had changed. The wife still turned away, the rituals still performed themselves without touch. But he had changed. And every time he opened Lit and found her there - quick with wit, dangerous with kindness - something in him stood up straighter. He remembered that desire is not a flaw; it’s a vital sign.

He stopped calling it weakness.
He started calling it life.

Their messages stretched - playful feints, sharp truths, the kind of teasing that made him feel less like a ghost and more like a man with heat in his blood. She didn’t just flirt; she woke him. She reminded him that boundaries are doors until someone brave turns the handle.

The bed tried to shame him back into stillness.
Hunger refused.

He carried it into daylight: in the way he met his own eyes in the mirror, in the way he spoke at work with a voice that didn’t wobble, in the way he took up space without apology. He did not confess this to anyone. He didn’t need to. Hunger confessed itself in how he moved now - shoulders unbowed, gaze steady, pulse unafraid.

At night, the old cold came sniffing at his window. He let it. Let it see what it could no longer own: a man warmed from the inside out by a woman’s words and his own returning courage.

He was wanted.
He was worthy.
He was alive.

Silence kept its watch. Hunger bared its teeth.

Because what began as a spark on a screen had become doctrine in his bones: no one gets to erase a man who remembers himself. Not neglect. Not fear. Not the long, slow freeze of a marriage that forgot he had skin.

The world will say hunger is dangerous. It is. That’s the point.

He didn’t chase ruin. He chose resurrection. And every time she wrote him - every time her words crossed the miles to touch him where hands had not - he rose again.

Let this be known:
Hunger can be starved. It cannot be killed.

https://forum.literotica.com/threads/sexless-marriages.1503158/post-101422849

 

[Canadian1968]

Wow, I can’t believe I found this thread and so many people just like me! 45 with a crazy sex drive and a husband that isn’t interested in me at all. I just want to be needed and craved by someone. I’ve had so many conversations with him about it and he is not interested in me at all. I’ve gained some weight recently due to some health issues and I feel like he doesn’t find me attractive. We are roommates, living under the same roof and not having a real relationship. 21 years of marriage so it’s hard to walk away.

Plenty of people in the same or very similar situation. Definitely not alone and Lit family to support and assist

 

[Carmina24]

Chapter 4: The Tomb Became a Throne

For years, his bed had been a grave.
Not of sleep, not of rest, but of touch. A tombstone in cotton sheets, marking every night he lay beside a body that turned away. Silence slept heavier than his wife ever did, pressing against his chest until he could barely breathe.

But the night the silence lost, everything shifted.

Now, when he slid beneath those same sheets, it was not as a prisoner. It was as a king. The bed did not bury him anymore; it crowned him. It became a throne, dangerous and alive, because he carried into it the memory of her.

Her words still clung to him like heat. The way she laughed across the void, the way she dared to see him when no one else bothered. She had touched him without hands, awakened him without a kiss, and in doing so, had changed the very air he breathed.

He no longer lay down empty.
He no longer closed his eyes in surrender.

He closed them with defiance. With hunger. With a secret no silence could steal.

In that bed, he was no longer erased. He was rebuilt.
Desirable. Worthy. Alive.

And every night he returned to it, the silence had to watch. Had to stand in the corner like a defeated ghost, knowing it could no longer claim him.

The tomb had become a throne.
And the man silence tried to bury now ruled with dangerous remembering.

Let this be the dagger’s truth: silence may linger, but it will never reign again.

https://forum.literotica.com/threads/sexless-marriages.1503158/post-101422849

 

[Carmina24]

Chapter 5: The Day the King Walked in the Sun

She was the spark.
The woman in Lit who dared to see him when no one else did. Her words struck the silence like a match, and the flame caught.

But the fire? The fire was his.

Because the true story was not her arrival. It was his uprising. The rebellion of a man who refused to let a cold bed or a turned back define his crown. The moment he cast off the name “sexless” and reclaimed the truth: King.

He was no longer the man erased in the dark. He was the sovereign reborn in fire.

The wife still turned away. The sheets still froze like stone. But they no longer ruled him. They no longer wrote his fate. They no longer chained his joy.

He walked differently now.
Shoulders squared. Eyes unflinching. A voice that thundered with the memory of his worth. He did not beg. He did not shrink. His presence commanded notice before a single word was spoken - because his soul carried the weight of a man who knows.

He was wanted.
He was worthy.
He was alive.

And he did not whisper it. He did not hide it. He wore it like a mantle. Like a crown forged in fire.

Silence had tried to bury him in shame. To starve him with absence. To chain him in loneliness. But in rising, he made silence his servant, not his master. He turned the tomb it built into a throne of defiance.

She had been the spark.
But the inferno was his.

And when desire walked in the sun, it did not crawl.
It roared.
It burned.
It crowned him unashamed.

Carve this in fire:
The man silence tried to starve now feasts on his own glory.
The man silence tried to erase now strides unbroken, crowned in flame.
And the silence that once claimed him kneels powerless -
for the King has risen, feral, triumphant, untouchable.

https://forum.literotica.com/threads/sexless-marriages.1503158/post-101422849

 

[Coconutty70]

Same girl. Shit is wild in the worst way.

It’s sh*t that beautiful women have to experience that. Seriously, I mean it. Shite for everyone I suppose, but to think you’re over there saying similar things as me (and others) and we’re so far away from each other. It’s a crying shame. Just so you know, you have a lot of moral support from over here and surely you’re beautiful, I know you’re desired (I vouch!) and even though it’s from along way away, from me you’re held too. I like hugs… good at them… have a massive hug from me! Fuuuuuuuuuck, yeah! Group hug. Bit of a squeeze too, a cheeky one, shhhh, don’t tell.

 

[luckydino]

Wife's 60th birthday a few days ago so treated her to a few days out, nice meals etc. which she thoroughly enjoyed, along with the offer of a few, more personal treats (in the nicest possible way of course) but every suggestion sadly declined She had a birthday card from an older religious & rather naive friend (who is actually very attractive with a cracking figure), which said on the front 'Swinging at 60', to which my immediate verbal response with a smile on my face was 'if only my dear, if only!' I received a very puzzled look from both my wife & her friend. Can only dream I suppose.....

Funny enough, my wife's friend popped round the other day to witness our signatures on a couple of forms. She didn't want to sit at the table so bent over the table to do her deeds, presenting me with the best rear view possible of a beautiful shaped rear & very lovely legs all wrapped in skin tight stretch jeans. I'm sure my wife caught me staring at her friends sexy arse.

 

[Coconutty70]

Funny enough, my wife's friend popped round the other day to witness our signatures on a couple of forms. She didn't want to sit at the table so bent over the table to do her deeds, presenting me with the best rear view possible of a beautiful shaped rear & very lovely legs all wrapped in skin tight stretch jeans. I'm sure my wife caught me staring at her friends sexy arse.

I wonder what would have happened if you had given it a bit of a spank? A cheeky grin? … or a court order?

 

[luckydino]

I wonder what would have happened if you had given it a bit of a spank? A cheeky grin? … or a court order?

Wondered that myself - may try that next time but think she is pretty straight & not up for fun....

 

[Eyelevel]

I think a wife I have been attracted irl to let something slip yesterday and I cannot stop thinking about it. She and her husband are not getting pregnant and they are trying for a 2nd child. I know that can be stressful on a marriage. Yesterday she was more affectionate in a business situation and I made a joke when we walked to the car that I did not want her to think I was her stalker. She joked back she didn’t know the last time she had a stalker like her husband is not pursuing her. I cannot stop thinking about her.

 

[Coconutty70]

I think a wife I have been attracted irl to let something slip yesterday and I cannot stop thinking about it. She and her husband are not getting pregnant and they are trying for a 2nd child. I know that can be stressful on a marriage. Yesterday she was more affectionate in a business situation and I made a joke when we walked to the car that I did not want her to think I was her stalker. She joked back she didn’t know the last time she had a stalker like her husband is not pursuing her. I cannot stop thinking about her.

Oh, that’s properly ambiguous! Watch out.

 

[jma82]

Lol. Actually quite sick of talking if you know what I mean

If any ladies want to take on the challenge of seeing if you can suffocate me, have a seat………better?

 

[hugh_jarce69]

I've only just joined this site. Almost first thing I saw was this thread. Kinda hits home with me too. I still have a high sex drive yet my wife (we've been married over 25 years) just isn't interested anymore. Shame as our sex life has been fucking awesome, done loads of things we've wanted to. We used to be really affectionate but now we kiss occasionally. Still love her to bits and she's still my best mate but as far as sex is concerned it's the right-hand man for me. Reckon that's why I've searched for this place, living out my fantasies in stories.

 

[Coconutty70]

I've only just joined this site. Almost first thing I saw was this thread. Kinda hits home with me too. I still have a high sex drive yet my wife (we've been married over 25 years) just isn't interested anymore. Shame as our sex life has been fucking awesome, done loads of things we've wanted to. We used to be really affectionate but now we kiss occasionally. Still love her to bits and she's still my best mate but as far as sex is concerned it's the right-hand man for me. Reckon that's why I've searched for this place, living out my fantasies in stories.

There’s more of us than expected, Hugh. Lots to see and do around the site though, so fill your boots! Welcome.

 

[hugh_jarce69]

There’s more of us than expected, Hugh. Lots to see and do around the site though, so fill your boots! Welcome.

thanks that's nice to know. I certainly don't mind filling some boots

 

[billgladstone]

I've only just joined this site. Almost first thing I saw was this thread. Kinda hits home with me too. I still have a high sex drive yet my wife (we've been married over 25 years) just isn't interested anymore. Shame as our sex life has been fucking awesome, done loads of things we've wanted to. We used to be really affectionate but now we kiss occasionally. Still love her to bits and she's still my best mate but as far as sex is concerned it's the right-hand man for me. Reckon that's why I've searched for this place, living out my fantasies in stories.

Married 40 years here. My sex partner these days is Nina Hartley or one of her friends. Working for me so far.

 

[hugh_jarce69]

Married 40 years here. My sex partner these days is Nina Hartley or one of her friends. Working for me so far.

haha, there's something very reassuring about the older pornstars isn't there. I tend to gravitate towards them too. Tracey Adams, Kay Parker, Little oral Annie, Taija Rae, Jeanna Fine. They all seem to have far more about them than many today

 

[billgladstone]

haha, there's something very reassuring about the older pornstars isn't there. I tend to gravitate towards them too. Tracey Adams, Kay Parker, Little oral Annie, Taija Rae, Jeanna Fine. They all seem to have far more about them than many today

Linda Roberts in "The New Neighbors" is unforgettable.

 

[hugh_jarce69]

Linda Roberts in "The New Neighbors" is unforgettable.

thanks for the tip. That's a new one on me. Just seen her pic, she's hot. Is there a thread for fave pornstars?