serious help

ok here is the deal she talked to him yesterday and she told hi that i know everything. she didnt tell him it was plane though just that i know. they both regret what they did because he has no intentios of being a home wrecker. her feelings are she never wanted to do it in the first place but she did it for me ok fine ill give her that but like i told if you didnt want to do it then you had the power to stop it before it start's right? we have come to an understanding that we screwd up now we have to fix it and that is what we are going to do. i know she aint going to do anything stupi because she has to much to lose. so i guess we will how it goes from here.
 
ReadyOne said:
I'm becoming more and more convinced that many regular posters have totally run out of sympathy for anyone or anything.

Probably comes from wearing blinders and a judge's robe....or maybe it's just the inability to think from all side or walk in another's shoes.

Then again...

He has said he has a bad back, ok so that makes it impossible for him to fuck her at the moment, but he has hands, fingers, and a tongue that do not depend on his ability to fuck.

How about sex toys, if she needs penetration to cum, what would have been wrong with buying her a whole truck full of toys?

To say that the only thing they could do was involve a third party is patently incorrect, so he asked about involving a third party, and was told by the board that unless you are really ok with it, there are so many pitfalls he should not do it.

They made their own minds up about it as a couple, and now when it has all fallen apart like the warning said it could (or would), he wants to cry in his beer, I don't have a lot of sympathy either.

To my eyes, the marriage is over in all but name, she won't quit seeing this other guy, then what is left of the marriage, she obviously has more feelings for this guy than she has for the marriage.

Divorce her, and move on with your life, consult an attorney and seek medical help for your depression.

Live and learn.
 
she has already told him it is over. she does not have feelings for him at all. this was something that we both agreed on and we both come to the conclusion that it was a mistake. i can except the fact that i asked her to do it and she because i wanted it. we agreed upon him because we bothe knew the guy. now because of my depression i have from my back surgery i was up and down all day with my emotions and that played an effect on her makeing her all confuse becasue one min i wanted it and the next time i didnt. well now that my head is getting clear from talking to some people and by the replys on here i have realized that i was and am not strong enough to do that type of life style. there is nothig to forgive because i asked her to do but it can easly be forgotten. i guess its one of those things in life we can look back on and say yeah we tryed that and laugh. well thatks for everyone's reply's good and bad they both hepled in telling me what to do and not to do. thanks agian.
 
tbon45 said:
not exactly a how to but a where to. i need help im in a big mess right now with my wife. she went through with sleeping another guy. even though it was exciting for the both of us i want her to quit. she told me she will not she also said she has no intentions of leaving me. ive been taking wellbutrin xl and im a total mess i need some one to talk to but have no one. i cant see a therapist because my medical insurance is being watched because of a law siute i have agianst my work for my back.what do i do guys im desperate here. im a total mess.

Oh, I'm so sorry. I know this happens a lot. I had a friend that was married for 18 years, and they wanted to try the swingers life style. He ended up falling in love with the other woman, and their marriage has ended.

If your wife doesn't stop, this obviously means she is disrecting her husband. You found out the hard way, sweetie. It was tempting, and now done, but now you're in pain. If she continues to do this, you have to do the right thing, and walk away before you're stressful condition gets much worse. Don't live like this or put up with it. You don't deserve to have this pain. If she truly loves you, she would stop.

I wish you the best. Be careful with those meds. It can make things worse. I've seen too much.
Love, saldne
 
thanks saldne. she has agreed to stop now that i i figured out what i want for sure and that is for her to be all mine. she was confused because i couldnt make up mine. now that i have she understands what i want. yes it was quite ann experiance but not what i want.
 
tbon45 said:
thanks saldne. she has agreed to stop now that i i figured out what i want for sure and that is for her to be all mine. she was confused because i couldnt make up mine. now that i have she understands what i want. yes it was quite ann experiance but not what i want.

Glad to hear. Sorry, maybe I should've read the whole thread ::blushes::
 
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