Sensory Depravation?

[Twenty2INM]

So, I've been seeing this girl. I'm totally crazy about her, which is great. One problem. We're both somewhat inexperienced in regards to certain sexual things. Such as bondage. Well, while trying some things out we found she's VERY responsive to it. She was blindfolded and her hands were tied. Part of it seemed that she had to concentrate on where she was being touched. So, my question is in regards to tips and help. And how to broach certain things with her. Of note should be she wishes to wait until marriage for ACTUAL sex. This is still very good for her though. THanks for any help i get.

 

[unfoundiamond]

I like when He belts my upper arms and blindfolds me at the same time, being ummobile and incapable of sight are a intoxicating combination.

I find erotic exphixiation is a bit of sensory depravation... I enjoy feeling reborn in his hands, slowly regaining all my senses seeing, then feeling, then making sound, then being able to move... I have a sort of full body orgasam.

I dunno... that prolly didn't help.

 

[EmpressFi]

I found these blindfolds, they're fur-lined (feaux fur) and the weight of them keep you from even accidentally lifting your eyelids. Usually we use that combined with the absence of sound in our play, because I get so distracted easily.you could also get the little foam earplugs, they sell them at most drugstores. That way she'd have to concentrate on your touch for her only stimulus

 

[myinnerslut]

blindfolds are great. i am a bit of a weird combination i guess. i like being blindfolded but i react to losing my site by curling up (my first instinct) untill i am not nervouse anymore.

 

[DreamSensualist]

You guys are going to have so much fun together!! I personally love sensory depravation. Outside of BDSM I have been known to go into one of those "float tanks" or "sensory depravation" tanks filled with warm bouyant salt water just to escape the world (and my own thoughts) for a time.

As EmpressFi pointed out, there are many types of blindfolds out there. Try a few out. They can range in prices & you can use your imagination. I personally really like those that have a bit of weight to them like Fi said. They provide a stronger sense of "isolation" by hindering the ability to open your eye lids. There are some that are filled with natural products like flax seed that has no scent or perhaps one that has a herbal essence added (Eucaplyptus & lavender are great for relaxation. Vanilla is an aphrodisisc for men I think?) You can quite often heat these in the microwave as well which will enhance the relaxing qualities of the herbs as well as sooth the eyes and mind. Just remember that "natural scents" can be quite arousing as well & you don't want to disguise these. If you feel the herbal smell is too overpowering then you can dip your fingers into her & then smear her juices along her upper lip... or even any of your own fluids.

I would recommend an "eye pillow" that has a strap to hold it in place & make sure that it covers the bridge of the nose properly so that no light sneaks in. One idea you could use if you can't find exactly what you want is to use a long scarf over the eys pillow to cover up anywhere ligt peeps in & to hold it securely with a tie behind her head. And remember you can play with textures like silk & fur.

My Je t'taime also used ear plugs for me. Once he places them he leans close and whispers in my ear, checking that I am OK. The further isolation, the straining to hear his voice, and thus the whole focus of my being going to him is a very sensual, erotic & sweet moment. If you are just learning with rope though it is sometimes nice that she can hear you so that you can regularly check in with her to see how she's going without loosing your place. Maybe you can use the scarf that you have tied her eye pilow with to go over her ears as well just to provide the sense of isolation without hindering verbal communication to much. Another idea is to use background noise. Like soothing music (nothing with lyrics though in case she starts singing along), as your develop your prefernces you can even use some more dramatic music to give her less of a sense of relaxation and make her question "Oh My God, what is he going to do with me?". Just make sure that she is confident in your looking after her and you know how to move slowly incase she is overwhelmed by restrains & uncertainity. Or a "white noise" machine that plays the sounds of waves, rain or night insetcs chirping ... whatever it is that is soothing to her & you. You can also buy those "nature" CD's .... some have just rainforest sounds or some have an instrument playing in accordance with the feel. Note though, some waterfall sounds etc may ruin a scene if her bladder is sensitive to suggestion!!!

Unfoundfiamond mentioned belting the upper arms and you had mentioned bondage. This is all so much fun. For her there is excitement as well as a sense of security. She has put herself into your hands to do with her body and mind as you will, and if you respect the trust she has in you she will get a greater sense of a release of responsibility and you'll most likely get a great (responsible) power rush and her trust in you will melt your heart. There is all sorts of bondage.... books on bondage, websites on bondage, posts here on Lit on bondage (check out some of Homburgs posts regarding this). Find what works for you... do you want soft nylon rope (great for beginners, easily available & cheap), something a little rougher like cotton or perhaps if this becomes a passion you can invest in some hemp rope. Another, less popular idea is using a very very long purposely made scarf to tie her up with a bow. She can be yoru present. She may love it that you think enough of her that you value her like this, and who can resist playing with a present wrapped in a pretty bow?

You can also buy some wrist cuffs & ankle cuffs as well as connectors if you want to restain her but like the idea of quick release to reposition her. Look for something either very cheap & dispisable like zip ties (don't tighten too much & I like padding between the ties & skin.. and always have medical scissors close at hand) or something very well made. Lining is nice, too much and if she glistens then it may get damp, too little or none and it may become uncomfortable. You may encourage her to "test" her restraints to further instill in her mind that she is secure and restrained.

Now that you have her as you want her.. what do you do with her? This of course is up to your personal preferences. Just make sure that the first few times you stay close. Touch her gently, whisper to her if she needs centering. Make sure you know her safe words and triggers that make her uncomfortable. Know her limits. Can you mark / bruise her or does she prefer a gentle but definate raking of your nails down her body? Does she like to have you bite down on her? How hard? Listen to her noises.. they are the biggest indicator of how and what she's feeling. I personally love it when my Je t'aime writes on me .. my wrists just by the cuffs, on my thigh or wherever. Not knowing what he has written, and teh fact that I trust him to write whatever he wants is a wonderful feeling.

As you said, you think the attraction is that she has to concentrate on where she is being touched. Make the most of this. Touch her in different ways & with different things. Feathers, fingers, mouth, leather, chain run over her body, clothes pins, wartenberg wheel & much further down the line try a blade (just make sure she is comfortbale with this & you know what you're doing). be gentle, be rough, mix it up.... when you think she may be sinking into the relaxation & tempo of a certain touch go a little longer then change it out... or stop all together to build the suspense .. You can either step back form her but make sure she is confident you won't leave her, or lay beside her, just touching, kissing her neck before pinching her thigh or whatever.... keep her quessing and she won't know if she's coming or going... until you make her come that is. Then slowly untie her, curl yourslef around her, and snuggle because she has just given herslef to your desires and asking her to enter reality too quickly is just cruel.

HAVE FUN!!

 

[Twenty2INM]

Thank you all but I'd like to especially thank Dream Sensualist. Wow. YOu've given me several things to think about....and an erection I'm not ashamed to admit. I picked up some honey, sparkling cider, 3 different grains of sandpaper, and some handcuffs. I did have an idea on the way home that I'd like to ask some feedback on. Drink powder. Like lemonade or tang. It should have a sandpapery feel and then i get to lick it off. Thoughts?

 

[DreamSensualist]

.......

 

[SubKekiLee]

I love sensory depravation... I love it when he takes away some of my senses... It heightens other things.... I love it.... I have blindfolds and we are looking into ropes and restraints he and I are going to look into a bed to try some restraints and that...

 

[VelvetDarkness]

You guys are going to have so much fun together!! I personally love sensory depravation. Outside of BDSM I have been known to go into one of those "float tanks" or "sensory depravation" tanks filled with warm bouyant salt water just to escape the world (and my own thoughts) for a time.

As EmpressFi pointed out, there are many types of blindfolds out there. Try a few out. They can range in prices & you can use your imagination. I personally really like those that have a bit of weight to them like Fi said. They provide a stronger sense of "isolation" by hindering the ability to open your eye lids. There are some that are filled with natural products like flax seed that has no scent or perhaps one that has a herbal essence added (Eucaplyptus & lavender are great for relaxation. Vanilla is an aphrodisisc for men I think?) You can quite often heat these in the microwave as well which will enhance the relaxing qualities of the herbs as well as sooth the eyes and mind. Just remember that "natural scents" can be quite arousing as well & you don't want to disguise these. If you feel the herbal smell is too overpowering then you can dip your fingers into her & then smear her juices along her upper lip... or even any of your own fluids.

I would recommend an "eye pillow" that has a strap to hold it in place & make sure that it covers the bridge of the nose properly so that no light sneaks in. One idea you could use if you can't find exactly what you want is to use a long scarf over the eys pillow to cover up anywhere ligt peeps in & to hold it securely with a tie behind her head. And remember you can play with textures like silk & fur.

My Je t'taime also used ear plugs for me. Once he places them he leans close and whispers in my ear, checking that I am OK. The further isolation, the straining to hear his voice, and thus the whole focus of my being going to him is a very sensual, erotic & sweet moment. If you are just learning with rope though it is sometimes nice that she can hear you so that you can regularly check in with her to see how she's going without loosing your place. Maybe you can use the scarf that you have tied her eye pilow with to go over her ears as well just to provide the sense of isolation without hindering verbal communication to much. Another idea is to use background noise. Like soothing music (nothing with lyrics though in case she starts singing along), as your develop your prefernces you can even use some more dramatic music to give her less of a sense of relaxation and make her question "Oh My God, what is he going to do with me?". Just make sure that she is confident in your looking after her and you know how to move slowly incase she is overwhelmed by restrains & uncertainity. Or a "white noise" machine that plays the sounds of waves, rain or night insetcs chirping ... whatever it is that is soothing to her & you. You can also buy those "nature" CD's .... some have just rainforest sounds or some have an instrument playing in accordance with the feel. Note though, some waterfall sounds etc may ruin a scene if her bladder is sensitive to suggestion!!!

Unfoundfiamond mentioned belting the upper arms and you had mentioned bondage. This is all so much fun. For her there is excitement as well as a sense of security. She has put herself into your hands to do with her body and mind as you will, and if you respect the trust she has in you she will get a greater sense of a release of responsibility and you'll most likely get a great (responsible) power rush and her trust in you will melt your heart. There is all sorts of bondage.... books on bondage, websites on bondage, posts here on Lit on bondage (check out some of Homburgs posts regarding this). Find what works for you... do you want soft nylon rope (great for beginners, easily available & cheap), something a little rougher like cotton or perhaps if this becomes a passion you can invest in some hemp rope. Another, less popular idea is using a very very long purposely made scarf to tie her up with a bow. She can be yoru present. She may love it that you think enough of her that you value her like this, and who can resist playing with a present wrapped in a pretty bow?

You can also buy some wrist cuffs & ankle cuffs as well as connectors if you want to restain her but like the idea of quick release to reposition her. Look for something either very cheap & dispisable like zip ties (don't tighten too much & I like padding between the ties & skin.. and always have medical scissors close at hand) or something very well made. Lining is nice, too much and if she glistens then it may get damp, too little or none and it may become uncomfortable. You may encourage her to "test" her restraints to further instill in her mind that she is secure and restrained.

Now that you have her as you want her.. what do you do with her? This of course is up to your personal preferences. Just make sure that the first few times you stay close. Touch her gently, whisper to her if she needs centering. Make sure you know her safe words and triggers that make her uncomfortable. Know her limits. Can you mark / bruise her or does she prefer a gentle but definate raking of your nails down her body? Does she like to have you bite down on her? How hard? Listen to her noises.. they are the biggest indicator of how and what she's feeling. I personally love it when my Je t'aime writes on me .. my wrists just by the cuffs, on my thigh or wherever. Not knowing what he has written, and teh fact that I trust him to write whatever he wants is a wonderful feeling.

As you said, you think the attraction is that she has to concentrate on where she is being touched. Make the most of this. Touch her in different ways & with different things. Feathers, fingers, mouth, leather, chain run over her body, clothes pins, wartenberg wheel & much further down the line try a blade (just make sure she is comfortbale with this & you know what you're doing). be gentle, be rough, mix it up.... when you think she may be sinking into the relaxation & tempo of a certain touch go a little longer then change it out... or stop all together to build the suspense .. You can either step back form her but make sure she is confident you won't leave her, or lay beside her, just touching, kissing her neck before pinching her thigh or whatever.... keep her quessing and she won't know if she's coming or going... until you make her come that is. Then slowly untie her, curl yourslef around her, and snuggle because she has just given herslef to your desires and asking her to enter reality too quickly is just cruel.

HAVE FUN!!

Quoted for brilliance

*swoon*

 

[myinnerslut]

A thought I had after the first post was that I didn't mention candles ... something that doesn't burn too hot (you don;t want to blister her).... but you don;t need to spend a lot of money either ... if you search the forum or library I'm sure you;ll find some tips..... I personally liked wax on my back but noticed that because it was burning a little hotter than normal it didn't harden as quickly & ran down into teh small of my back forming a larger pool of more intense heat ... we either needed a pillow under my hips/belly to remove this effect or a different candle / body part.....

since you mentioned you were both inexperienced i would master blindfolds before moving to waxing, but if you do make sure you do it safely.

make sure that you get candles that burn quickly. the cheaper the cande the better for this they are. those cheap white emergency candles work well for most people. my skin is really sensitive so we use only soy candles which dont burn as hot.

make sure you test the candle on yourself. the inside of your forearm is good for this. ifit burns you at the hight you are holding the candle from your skin, it will burn her at that hieght.

oh, and its messy, you may want to invest in a dropcloth.

 

[Harmony_1985]

I absolutely love it when he handcuffs me to the bed then blindfolds me. Not knowing whats coming is such a turn on for me.

The one thing he did that I loved was he made me wait. He locked me in, blindfolded me then left me, just sat there watching me (I assume thats what he did, I didn't hear him leave the room lol) for what seemed like an eternity. The anticipation was so good and I was so turned on by the time he did actually touch me.

That said his first touch was a cold blob of yoghurt right on my nipple so of course my reaction was a squeal!!

 

[SweetDomme_29]

So, I've been seeing this girl. I'm totally crazy about her, which is great. One problem. We're both somewhat inexperienced in regards to certain sexual things. Such as bondage. Well, while trying some things out we found she's VERY responsive to it. She was blindfolded and her hands were tied. Part of it seemed that she had to concentrate on where she was being touched. So, my question is in regards to tips and help. And how to broach certain things with her. Of note should be she wishes to wait until marriage for ACTUAL sex. This is still very good for her though. THanks for any help i get.

OOHHHH!!!!!! This brings out the playful side of me

1) Lay her in the middle of the bed.
2) Stretch her hands out and over her head.
3) Tie them to the posts of the bed.
4) Blindfold her.
5) Plug her ears with foam earplugs sold at most drugstores.
6) Tie a rope around each one of her ankles.
7) Spread her legs
8) Lift her legs off of the bed and pull them towards her chest.
9) Tie the robes connected to her ankles to the ropes binding her hands. This should spread her legs and lift her ass off of the bed. Now you have access to all her sweet spots.
10) Buy a long peacock feather from your local arts and crafts store such as "Michael's".
11) Stand beside the bed barefoot so that you do not make a sound when moving.
12) ENJOY! teasing her and don't forget to let me know if she still wants to wait till marriage for "actual" sex

 

[Harmony_1985]

OOHHHH!!!!!! This brings out the playful side of me

1) Lay her in the middle of the bed.
2) Stretch her hands out and over her head.
3) Tie them to the posts of the bed.
4) Blindfold her.
5) Plug her ears with foam earplugs sold at most drugstores.
6) Tie a rope around each one of her ankles.
7) Spread her legs
8) Lift her legs off of the bed and pull them towards her chest.
9) Tie the robes connected to her ankles to the ropes binding her hands. This should spread her legs and lift her ass off of the bed. Now you have access to all her sweet spots.
10) Buy a long peacock feather from your local arts and crafts store such as "Michael's".
11) Stand beside the bed barefoot so that you do not make a sound when moving.
12) ENJOY! teasing her and don't forget to let me know if she still wants to wait till marriage for "actual" sex

That is so getting tried!

 

[curiousalice]

Thank you DreamSensualist

I don't know if anyone saw what I had to ask in the X Marks the Dominant thread, but what DreamSensualist had to say hit my questions right on the head about Dominance. I am very new to the D/s scene, so I wanted to make sure that I didn't just say "oh, I'm a sub because I like being Dominated" without first understanding what it really means to be Dominated, since what I fantisize about may just be rough sex, and nothing really more.

Thank you again DreamSensualist. You have given me ideas to share with my boyfriend as well as made me feel a little more secure about claiming to be a sub.

As to the sensory deprivation, I used a pillow (I couldn't find anything else) and kept my eyes closed. It drove me nuts, and I am happy that my boyfriend allowed me to do it. Sometimes he likes to stop me from doing things just because he knows he can. I can't wait to try it again and with more things. Someday we'll both be home from work, at the same time, for MORE than five minutes before passing out/leaving again and we'll be able to explore this to a greater extent.

 

[jmanque]

Sensory depreviation hoods can be a real head trip, and quite scary. They don't completely cut off hearing, but do distort sound. They can be tightened to squeeze the entire head. Some only have nose holes, or a very small mouth hole for breathing- part of the trip, so the sub has to be monitored carefully, and many can be locked in place, allowing a sub with hands free to still be totally under the control of master/mistress. Check out JT's stockroom or some of the other big web toy stores and you'll see quite an assortment.