Self injurers.

[ABSTRUSE]

Last night I caught the season's premier on WEtv's "Secret lives of Women"
Link
It was very good and informative.
I am a self confessed cutter and I know of several others here who share the same addiction. Its a shamelful secret.

I find it easy to share these things here with this forum, not only does it help me to understand myself but it lets others know they are not alone with their pain.

I'm not sure when the repeat is on but if you have a chance to catch, please watch it.

and for those who indulge...........you're not crazy you're in pain. Most importantly you are not alone.

My weapon of choice: a single edge razor.

If anyone wants to share or needs some help, write your story here or PM me if you need to talk.

Abs.

 

[TheEarl]

I'm always interested to read more about it. Thankfully, it's not me at the moment, but I strongly suspect I'm gonna carry the scars forever.

The Earl

 

[ABSTRUSE]

I'm always interested to read more about it. Thankfully, it's not me at the moment, but I strongly suspect I'm gonna carry the scars forever.

The Earl

They are gentle reminders of where you've been and where you are going.

 

[TheEarl]

They are gentle reminders of where you've been and where you are going.

Where was my life save point again?

The Earl

 

[arienette]

Last night I caught the season's premier on WEtv's "Secret lives of Women"
Link
It was very good and informative.
I am a self confessed cutter and I know of several others here who share the same addiction. Its a shamelful secret.

I find it easy to share these things here with this forum, not only does it help me to understand myself but it lets others know they are not alone with their pain.

I'm not sure when the repeat is on but if you have a chance to catch, please watch it.

and for those who indulge...........you're not crazy you're in pain. Most importantly you are not alone.

My weapon of choice: a single edge razor.

If anyone wants to share or needs some help, write your story here or PM me if you need to talk.

Abs.

*peeks out of closet*
If you catch when a repeat is on will you tape it for me?

Earl, cocoa butter is supposed to help with scars, but I know that mine are so bad that it doesn't help too much. Worth a shot, though.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Where was my life save point again?

The Earl

The point where you realized you were still alive and able to feel.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

*peeks out of closet*
If you catch when a repeat is on will you tape it for me?

Earl, cocoa butter is supposed to help with scars, but I know that mine are so bad that it doesn't help too much. Worth a shot, though.

I will do just that.

there are scar meds out there, I was told to try Bag balm as well and that helped.

 

[arienette]

I will do just that.

there are scar meds out there, I was told to try Bag balm as well and that helped.

I'll have to look into that, and thanks. I looked at the link and it's definitely something I want to watch.

It's weird, I saw this thread title and I got chills and my blood ran cold for a second. My little Holly was like "Big Holly, there! Click there, we need something. Anything."

Also, I wanted to tell you something - me and Little Holly have been talking a lot lately...I never thought I could get her to come out.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Another helpful link.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

I'll have to look into that, and thanks. I looked at the link and it's definitely something I want to watch.

It's weird, I saw this thread title and I got chills and my blood ran cold for a second. My little Holly was like "Big Holly, there! Click there, we need something. Anything."

Also, I wanted to tell you something - me and Little Holly have been talking a lot lately...I never thought I could get her to come out.

I am soooooooo proud of you.

 

[Aurora Black]

Is this thread only for cutters? Because there are other ways that a person can self-injure. Switching between bingeing and starving, for example.

 

[arienette]

I am soooooooo proud of you.

Me too, she is too and she forgives me - finally, but only because I've been getting help. She felt neglected, the damn attention whore.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Is this thread only for cutters? Because there are other ways that a person can self-injure. Switching between bingeing and starving, for example.

Nope. Any self injury info is welcome.

 

[TheEarl]

*peeks out of closet*
If you catch when a repeat is on will you tape it for me?

Earl, cocoa butter is supposed to help with scars, but I know that mine are so bad that it doesn't help too much. Worth a shot, though.

I'm using a specialised scar cream, but, to be honest, the two big ones do tend to go a little too deep.

The Earl

 

[Aurora Black]

http://www.something-fishy.org/isf/signssymptoms.php

http://www.something-fishy.org/dangers/dangers.php

 

[arienette]

I'm using a specialised scar cream, but, to be honest, the two big ones do tend to go a little too deep.

The Earl

I hate that, I really do. I try to remember what Abs said - Just gentle reminders but sometimes I like to see them, to show myself that and other times I just want them to go away. I want to be able to wear a bathing suit...I've just started letting myself wear shorts (what a summer to do it, too!) and I get questions about the many, many tic tac toe boards stacked on top of each other on my ankles.

 

[TheEarl]

Another helpful link.

"Validating their emotional pain -- the wounds can serve as evidence that those feelings are real"

That's the first time I've seen that mentioned on a self-harm website and it is something I know about. Good site.

The Earl

 

[Aurora Black]

Eating Disorder Questionnaire

 

[Selena_Kitt]

My weapon of choice: a single edge razor.

mine too... at one point I had a box full--300 of them.
.

 

[FallingToFly]

Does mental self-injury count? Because that one, I can relate to. I've always had a great deal of trouble empathising with or understanding cutting, and have been known to be a real bitch about it with friends who started or I caught at it.

It was only recently that I realized that a lot of my writing is my version of cutting- I let the blood spill onto paper instead of out of my skin. Unfortunately, it doesn't always make me feel better- it makes me more twisted up in psychological knots. One of my girls whose been a cutter for a couple years said it works that way with her as well.

I'm considering a therapist. Granted, my last shot at that was a disaster, but it's getting to the point where my family and friends keep "tabs" on me. They think I don't know that they've got me on a type of suicide watch, so I just let them do it. It's kind of sweet,in a creepy way- I just wish they'd figure out that suicide isn't even an option for me.

But I'm always glad to talk to anyone needing a shoulder to lean or cry on, and I do my best to cheer people up or just let them be angry, or sad, or frustrated- whatever they need.

Although I usually opt for cheering up. Poor 672 is a victim of my infamous "make you laugh at me instead of scream" philosophy.

 

[Guest]

Does mental self-injury count? Because that one, I can relate to. I've always had a great deal of trouble empathising with or understanding cutting, and have been known to be a real bitch about it with friends who started or I caught at it.

It was only recently that I realized that a lot of my writing is my version of cutting- I let the blood spill onto paper instead of out of my skin. Unfortunately, it doesn't always make me feel better- it makes me more twisted up in psychological knots. One of my girls whose been a cutter for a couple years said it works that way with her as well.

I'm considering a therapist. Granted, my last shot at that was a disaster, but it's getting to the point where my family and friends keep "tabs" on me. They think I don't know that they've got me on a type of suicide watch, so I just let them do it. It's kind of sweet,in a creepy way- I just wish they'd figure out that suicide isn't even an option for me.

But I'm always glad to talk to anyone needing a shoulder to lean or cry on, and I do my best to cheer people up or just let them be angry, or sad, or frustrated- whatever they need.

Although I usually opt for cheering up. Poor 672 is a victim of my infamous "make you laugh at me instead of scream" philosophy.

My family and friends do that with me, keeping "tabs" on me with my poetry, which they're probably right for the most part. However, some miss the point of such pensive, self-loathing and sometimes suicidal poetry IS a form of therapy. It does relieve some of those thoughts and feelings to write them down because once on the page, it's out of your head at that moment.

If you can get good therapy, go for it. It helps immensely.

 

[Aurora Black]

However, some miss the point of such pensive, self-loathing and sometimes suicidal poetry IS a form of therapy. It does relieve some of those thoughts and feelings to write them down because once on the page, it's out of your head at that moment.

Exactly.

 

[arienette]

My family and friends do that with me, keeping "tabs" on me with my poetry, which they're probably right for the most part. However, some miss the point of such pensive, self-loathing and sometimes suicidal poetry IS a form of therapy. It does relieve some of those thoughts and feelings to write them down because once on the page, it's out of your head at that moment.

If you can get good therapy, go for it. It helps immensely.

I definitely know how that is. My father was never too interested in my writing. I have been writing since the 8th grade, almost all poetry and he had never read a piece until I started putting everything I had up on my personal website. My family consists of people who go out of their way to find out shit about people and talk about it, but never talk to the actual person they're talking about. My father found an old poem, one of the firsts ever called Slit Wrist Theory and I immediately was getting lectures from my grandmother (never from him, of course) about how I have no reason to be depressed and she wishes she could have a life like mine and how I'm too young to feel horrible and I began to get mocked. I lived in my room (when I live with them, of course) and she would come up and say "Oh, are you being depressed today?"

They were never people I could really talk to, obviously. The only reason I started writing in the first place is to work through childhood trauma I had, stuff my family will never know about, but what they do know should be enough to have told them that I wasn't okay.

But then again, I once told my father about my cutting. I showed him my razors, my cuts, old scars and I begged him to help me because I had a problem and I couldn't stop and I needed to stop hurting. He told me to cut the shit and walked out of my room and he never talked to me about it again. That was 5 years ago and I have just stopped cutting - the last time being last month, but before then I didn't in a good 6 to 7 months. I told him I had a problem and I couldn't stop and because he wasn't there for me, it took me 5 years, plus the year before I told him - 6 years of scars until I had the courage to help myself.

 

[Aurora Black]

I definitely know how that is. My father was never too interested in my writing. I have been writing since the 8th grade, almost all poetry and he had never read a piece until I started putting everything I had up on my personal website. My family consists of people who go out of their way to find out shit about people and talk about it, but never talk to the actual person they're talking about. My father found an old poem, one of the firsts ever called Slit Wrist Theory and I immediately was getting lectures from my grandmother (never from him, of course) about how I have no reason to be depressed and she wishes she could have a life like mine and how I'm too young to feel horrible and I began to get mocked. I lived in my room (when I live with them, of course) and she would come up and say "Oh, are you being depressed today?"

They were never people I could really talk to, obviously. The only reason I started writing in the first place is to work through childhood trauma I had, stuff my family will never know about, but what they do know should be enough to have told them that I wasn't okay.

But then again, I once told my father about my cutting. I showed him my razors, my cuts, old scars and I begged him to help me because I had a problem and I couldn't stop and I needed to stop hurting. He told me to cut the shit and walked out of my room and he never talked to me about it again. That was 5 years ago and I have just stopped cutting - the last time being last month, but before then I didn't in a good 6 to 7 months. I told him I had a problem and I couldn't stop and because he wasn't there for me, it took me 5 years, plus the year before I told him - 6 years of scars until I had the courage to help myself.

God damn!

 

[joeys-game]

As a kid it was with anything I could get my hands on that was sharp enough. Sometimes the effort it took to cut was too much. As I grew older it was a knife or a razor blade. The blood I swear releases the feelings of frusteration, anger, hoplessness and fear..(fear was a big one) if I could 'feel' the pain, see the blood, I was actually alive...I had thought I was over all that shit but I don't think it ever truly goes away.