Second Story Posted !!!

[closetblonde]

Hello everyone -

Here's my second attempt. Still a short story. I'm trying to build to a real
(longer) story, but haven't been able to get there yet. Again, please be
honest. I'll take both constructive and non-constructive criticism.


Here's the link...


http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=355749



Thanks.

CB

 

[litchipking]

Much improvement

Read and left public comment. Nice story.

 

[Djinn_vixen]

not bad at all

 

[manyeyedhydra]

The odd typo (suppose instead of supposed - I think) but it seemed very solid to me.

You mentioned you were trying to build up to a longer story. I think you've got the beginnings of an interesting scenario here that could build up over a couple of extra chapters if you put your mind to it.

The bi wife, the husband and the lesbian ex-wife. All sorts of shenanigans could occur here

(just remember not to post any of it in loving wives )