Safe Sex in Erotic Fiction?

[NerdGuy11]

Hello Authors,

I am but a simple erotica reader and I enjoy reading the many tales on this site but one thing bugs me whenever I read a story.

I read a lot of First Time stories probably because I am still a virgin (comes with being a nerd really) and it turns me off every time there is no reference to safe sex practices like the girl saying she is on the pill or the guy putting on a condom.

This could be all down to my context but what about you authors, is it a turn on or turn off?

(I did find a thread about this from 2005 but I didn't want to bump a 5 year old thread)

 

[sr71plt]

You do realize that this is fantasy fiction, don't you?

I write both without and with, depending on the mood and the context. In neither case am I writing nonfiction for the Temperance Union, though. I'm going for the personal arousal element not writing for a medical journal.

(I'll add a note that my story that posted today pointedly includes condom use.)

 

[TxRad]

As SR said, I write both ways.

Also as he said most of the stories here are fiction and fantasy.

It might also be noted that most people don't worry about safe sex in their fantasies because they are controlling all aspects of it. Fantasy may be the last bastion of truly safe sex. As long as your left hand knows where the right one has been in any case.

Something else that might also be the case is the age of the writer. Younger writers probably do the safe sex thing more than us old farts. To us the golden age of sex was a reality before aids and all the rest. all we had to worry about back then was pregnancy and/or a shot of penicillin.

 

[favoritesgoddess]

Something else that might also be the case is the age of the writer. Younger writers probably do the safe sex thing more than us old farts. To us the golden age of sex was a reality before aids and all the rest. all we had to worry about back then was pregnancy and/or a shot of penicillin.

This.

I like my fantasies unwrapped.

 

[Stella_Omega]

It does sometimes bother me when fictional characters do unsafe things!

If the storyteller is good, I wonder if readers will be so turned on they will think they should do the same thing.

If the storyteller is bad, I tend to assume they themselves aren't doing things safely. yeah, that might be an unreasonable prejudice.

I once started a story where one of the guys told the other he wanted to bareback, and it turned the focus completely away from the erotic action and into marriage proposal territory-- I dropped that scene because i simply could not find a way to balance the action again.

 

[polynices]

I'm on the fence on this one - though I think the issue is well worth raising.

I've written both kinds of story - stories with condoms and stories without. I justify the stories without condoms in the way others have here - 'The story's just a fantasy', etc. However, I often feel a shade uncomfortable about doing that. Sometimes I've gone so far as to add a footnote to a story - 'In real life, they really ought to use condoms, but this is just a fantasy, so they didn't.' - or words to that effect.

This question points to more general issues related to writing fantasy sex as well. The vast majority of readers will take what we write as mere fantasy and won't try to imitate the riskier acts we may describe in their own real lives. But do we - do I - ever influence anyone to risky behaviour? I don't know, but I can't rule it out.

As I said, I'm on the fence. I'm loath to prohibit myself, let alone anyone else, from writing 'unsafe' fantasies - e.g. unprotected sex with a stranger. But ...

- polynices

 

[sr71plt]

I'm not a babysitter, really, or see "he made me do it" as either a legal or a moral excuse. Readers need to take responsibility for themselves. The need for safe sex isn't some sort of state secret.

Of course I neither write about nor read about ax murders.

So, if you're uncomfortable writing any theme, don't.

 

[Stella_Omega]

it depends on the setting, too, In a realistic setting, I expect realistic sex. Contemporary setting means contemporary sex practices.

If the story is historical, not so much. If I'm writing about vampires or centaurs or merfolk-- not at all. Vampires don't have STDs.

 

[soflabbwlvr]

I initially wrote stories with safe sex practices. Those stories were, in fact based upon true events. Partially in response to prior discussions wherein others have opined that "it's just a fantasy," I have gotten away from that. No one has complained.

Does it help a story to add "he paused and put on a condom?" I don't think so.

I do have one or two future stories where the use/non-use of a condom is critical to the storyline, but otherwise, my characters will continue to go bareback.

 

[sr71plt]

Putting on a condom can be made sexy, I think. Certainly you can use it for tension of the anticipation.

 

[JackLuis]

I seldom write in modern day. But when I do I allude to safe sex practices. It did make me queasy to write about anal sex, the thought of all that, ick, sort of drowns out the thrill for me.

 

[Toqueme]

As both reader and writer, I don't like it. I want the fantasy where that (very important IRL) issue is moot.

 

[michchick98]

I initially wrote stories with safe sex practices. Those stories were, in fact based upon true events. Partially in response to prior discussions wherein others have opined that "it's just a fantasy," I have gotten away from that. No one has complained.

Does it help a story to add "he paused and put on a condom?" I don't think so.

I do have one or two future stories where the use/non-use of a condom is critical to the storyline, but otherwise, my characters will continue to go bareback.

I don't think it helps or hurts it. I agree with others, it depends on the story. But even if the story itself was sensual and arousing, I wouldn't find it a turn-off for the man to pause and put on a condom.

Putting on a condom can be made sexy, I think. Certainly you can use it for tension of the anticipation.

When I write, it depends on the mood and the setting as to whether or not I have the characters practice safe sex. Neither has really seemed to affect the story.

I've read many stories where the characters do practice safe sex and as sr71plt stated, it can be made to be very sexy, especially condom use. There are many ways it can be written to enhance the "mood" of the sex scene.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I initially wrote stories with safe sex practices. Those stories were, in fact based upon true events. Partially in response to prior discussions wherein others have opined that "it's just a fantasy," I have gotten away from that. No one has complained.

Does it help a story to add "he paused and put on a condom?" I don't think so.

I do have one or two future stories where the use/non-use of a condom is critical to the storyline, but otherwise, my characters will continue to go bareback.

You can certainly do better than that.

"She watched him hungrily while he fumbled the condom. "Here, she said, taking it from his shaking hand. The sleek latex transformed his flesh into something sculpted and a little bit remote, but the rest of him was impassioned flesh, flushing as she sat over him."

 

[sr71plt]

You can certainly do better than that.

"She watched him hungrily while he fumbled the condom. "Here, she said, taking it from his shaking hand. The sleek latex transformed his flesh into something sculpted and a little bit remote, but the rest of him was impassioned flesh, flushing as she sat over him."

In my "today" story, I had the lad take notice of crowning number one and then look up and see that there were several more condoms there waiting to be used--and then do some anticipation mental gymnastics.

 

[LunaEroticaMystica]

I'm with everyone else. It depends on setting, the story, and type of story. I've written stories with both, as well. In ~Pumpkin Pie Passion~; safe sex (namely the pill) was pivotal to that story. If written well, I don't feel it detracts from the story to emphasize the safety. But, I agree with the fantasy aspect as well. To each his/her own, I suppose.

 

[jomar]

I'm thinking of a farce in which good folk are trying to use safe sex but in which nobody gets laid.

 

[sr71plt]

I'm thinking of a farce in which good folk are trying to use safe sex but in which nobody gets laid.

Christmas contest, please.

 

[Jagged]

My online role plays usually have references to safe sex, because they're realistic in nature. That isn't always the case, but for the most part I like having elements of reality. For some I'm sure it could cause problems with an erotic fantasy so they omit safe sex, but it is fantasy after all. A world free of STD's would nice, and pregnancy just doesn't happen are possible, if you start of writing them that way.

 

[FallingToFly]

I have written it, but I usually don't. I really can't imagine writing something like 21st Century Cure- where at one point there is fucking on top of a pile of corpses, and at another a Zydrate gun is being used in a really evil DP scenario- with that condom pause.

As I get older, I tend to write more and more dark, bitter, dangerously erotic work. Some of the stuff I'm working on now probably won't be publishable on Lit. And condoms, safe sex, or any kind of "sanity" don't really play a part in it. I'm writing MY fantasies of blood and sex and horror and pain. If others find a similar pleasure in the words- wonderful. If not- well, it doesn't stop my poisoned pen from scribbling away madly.

 

[Stella_Omega]

In my "today" story, I had the lad take notice of crowning number one and then look up and see that there were several more condoms there waiting to be used--and then do some anticipation mental gymnastics.

Yes!

Safe sex preoccupation or action, can be used to develop a character.

 

[Boxlicker101]

First, I want to say that being on The Pill does not constitute safe sex.

Second, my characters almost always employ safe sex for vaginal or anal sex, but never for oral and not when dildos are being used. They never wear condoms when the sex is with werewolves or unicorns or Zoopians or elves, and sex between married people does not usually involve condoms. The one actual rape I have written about did not involve a condom, because it would have been very unrealistic. People role-playing a rape do use condoms.

I don't sneak the condom in either, but describe the application in some detail. Sometimes I have the woman taking the cock in her mouth to get it wet so she can roll the condom on more easily. I even had one woman wearing a condom while giving head and masturbating.

I have had feedback criticizing, even one-bombing stories because a condom was used, but I will continue to include them in stories when it is appropriate.

 

[Stella_Omega]

First, I want to say that being on The Pill does not constitute safe sex.

Second, my characters almost always employ safe sex for vaginal or anal sex, but never for oral and not when dildos are being used. They never wear condoms when the sex is with werewolves or unicorns or Zoopians or elves, and sex between married people does not usually involve condoms. The one actual rape I have written about did not involve a condom, because it would have been very unrealistic. People role-playing a rape do use condoms.

I don't sneak the condom in either, but describe the application in some detail. Sometimes I have the woman taking the cock in her mouth to get it wet so she can roll the condom on more easily. I even had one woman wearing a condom while giving head and masturbating.

I have had feedback criticizing, even one-bombing stories because a condom was used, but I will continue to include them in stories when it is appropriate.

I expect nothing less from you, for that matter.

 

[LunaEroticaMystica]

True Box, but in my story all he worried about was pregnancy. Being a sci-fi/fantasy story, the other elements just weren't there.

 

[jomar]

Christmas contest, please.

Hmmm, a long drive today...I'll try to flesh it out.