Sadist = Dominant?

[blulilacgrl]

Just a question that I have.. I was reading a thread on here from a while ago and it was talking about Dominance and Sadism. It seemed like the two are considered part of the same thing. A 'not every Dominant is a Sadist but every Sadist is a Dominant' kind of thing.

I wonder if it is possible to be a Sadist and yet a sub at the same time? Is it generally understood that if you are a Sadist, you are also a Dom? Has anyone ever met anyone that was a Sadistic submissive?

I have met quite a few Sadist that when all was said and done I didn't feel they were entirely Dominant but I will say that I have never met anyone who identified as both a sub and a Sadist. At most I have seen people identify as a Switch and a Sadist.

 

[midwestyankee]

I don't buy the absolute that every sadist is a dominant any more than the notion that every pain slut is a submissive. It seems quite reasonable to me that many sadists might not care much about holding the dominant role in a relationship while still preferring to cause pain hen they top someone else. I don't have any personal examples to support my thinking here, but logic dictates that I'm probably right.

Now, as for the combination of submissive and sadist, I guess anything's possible.

 

[bhndblueyes88]

I don't specifically identify with dom or sub (i'm more of a "bottom"), but I definitely have a sadistic streak. Luckily my partner has a bit of a masochistic sprinkle, so it works well.

There are plenty of ways I can imagine for a submissive to utilize/feed sadism. It would obviously depend on the relationship (duh), but who says you can't have a masochistic dom? Or a dom that liked to watch his sub whip around some one else? There's tons of possibilities if you think about it.

 

[IzzyAndy]

I started a similar thread (opposite way around!) a long time ago and some of the people who replied to that were definitely not Doms, here

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=827773

 

[Que]

I think you could be a submissive and really enjoy a sadistic thrill in scourging your theoretical masochistic dominant. Just as a service top could be submissive.

I agree though the (slight) possibility I envision of that happening seems more likely the domain of the switch-tastic among us.

 

[Primalex]

Well, I associate submissive sadists with people who like to cause suffering but lack the backbone to own it up. You know, the kind of people who are cruel to animals etc.


I guess this prejudication is unfair.


*shrugs*

 

[blulilacgrl]

Do I get the sense that while the theoretical possibility is there, no one has ever met one in real life? Are they as elusive as unicorns and leprechauns?

I think you could be a submissive and really enjoy a sadistic thrill in scourging your theoretical masochistic dominant. Just as a service top could be submissive.

I agree though the (slight) possibility I envision of that happening seems more likely the domain of the switch-tastic among us.

Now that should be the label... switch-tastic! Have you copyrighted it yet?

Well, I associate submissive sadists with people who like to cause suffering but lack the backbone to own it up. You know, the kind of people who are cruel to animals etc.


I guess this prejudication is unfair.


*shrugs*

I have never been cruel to animals!

 

[Primalex]

I have never been cruel to animals!

So, how do you get your kicks?

 

[blulilacgrl]

So, how do you get your kicks?

Oh I learned the hard way that kicks hurt. Especially when said kick is delivered with a steel toe boot.

 

[Primalex]

Sorry, my fault to expect a serious answer.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

For years, I identified as a Sadistic Dominant; however, after a lot of thought, I have determined that I am actually a Sadist with *some* dominant tendencies, not really a Dominant at all. How bout it, Stella? Service Sadist, Sadistic Top? Hmmm?

 

[Sweetdaisymae]

I am a submissive with sadistic tendencies. I am a rope switch, I am an impact play switch. I love making pretty patterns in the skin of my consenting victim, and sending them to subspace (and yes I do aftercare) but the idea of controlling and dominating another does absolutely nothing for me.
The idea of injuring a non consenting person does nothing for me.
I primarily identify as submissive. I am owned and collared and serve my Master, but I am also a sadist.
Oh and I like tying people up too.

 

[YourCaptor]

No they don't have to be the same.

People that could be sadistic subs:
mean girls
passive aggressive people
soldier following orders
etc

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

Identifying as a sub and a sadist seems as if it would take some contortions. Like, seeking out Doms who they perceived to be confused or conflicted about their Dominess. Then, when being dominated, he or she could enjoy that, while simultaneously getting off on the sadistic knowledge that the Dom was secretly hating it.

PYL: "Get on all fours and present your ass."

pyl/sadist: "Mmmm... yes Sir..." [SO HOT!! And he HATES IT!!!]





And I agree with SW that this sort of sedimentary excavation is tailor-made for Stella.

 

[blulilacgrl]

I think we need a signal for Stella. Or maybe we just need Brando.... Stellaaaaaa

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

Yes, I think it is possible to have sadistic leanings regardless of the hat you do or maybe don't wear.

 

[Wyldfire]

Nope. Not even a little bit. A Dominant can be a sadist, but Sadism has little in common with a Dominant. Dominants are about control. Sadists are about pain. Big difference. Pain can be a way of obtaining control, but in the mind it is a big difference. A Sadist hurts for the sake of hurting. A Dominant only hurts as a method of control. Sadist= Pain as a goal. Dominant= Control as a goal, pain is a means to said end not the end in and of itself.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Nope. Not even a little bit. A Dominant can be a sadist, but Sadism has little in common with a Dominant. Dominants are about control. Sadists are about pain. Big difference. Pain can be a way of obtaining control, but in the mind it is a big difference. A Sadist hurts for the sake of hurting. A Dominant only hurts as a method of control. Sadist= Pain as a goal. Dominant= Control as a goal, pain is a means to said end not the end in and of itself.

What she said.

I think that sadism and dominance are seperate things. They go well together but they don't have to.

Orthogony* for the win!

*My new word, you like it?

eta: I do know of at least one person who identifies as a submissive who can put a major hurt on anyone who asks-- and she definitely enjoys it.

 

[IrisAlthea]

I think a lot of confusion arises from the need to identify as either a submissive or a dominant.
For a lot of things, it's not that relevant and I think a lot of people over estimate how fixed their place on the dom-sub scale is.

 

[drinkz]

.....

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

I wanted to put in a public service plug for good ol' completely-non-submissive sexual sadism.

I feel better now.

 

[dreamykitten2]

I am a switch and have been a bottom and a top at times

I'm also a sadist. I enjoy watching my bottoms/subs twitching and struggling. I also am a Domme with my Dom as he is sub at that time. I really enjoy the ironic nature of having him sub for me and get an enormous thrill while he struggles to perform for me. And making him talk while he is in the throes is especially sweet!!!!
Kitten

 

[Sweetdaisymae]

I wanted to put in a public service plug for good ol' completely-non-submissive sexual sadism.

I feel better now.

Mmmmmmmm! Yep, I can dig that!