re-evaluating my relationship

[Marquis]

This is one fine intervention.

For those of you still interested in helping, may I suggest using reverse psychology?

The current strategy only creates traction to argue against.

With that, I wish you and B the best BiBunny. No relationship is perfect and it's obvious you two really care about each other, which is what counts.

Who knows what the future will hold for the two of you?

 

[BiBunny]

This is one fine intervention.

For those of you still interested in helping, may I suggest using reverse psychology?

The current strategy only creates traction to argue against.

With that, I wish you and B the best BiBunny. No relationship is perfect and it's obvious you two really care about each other, which is what counts.

Who knows what the future will hold for the two of you?

Sarcasm doesn't become you, m'dear.

With that, I'm slipping out the back door. I've hijacked poor mis' thread enough.

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[Bi_Kitty]

You called for Kitty? Well, here I am!

Okay for everyone who wants to say something bad about Bunny's relationship with B. First of all, she didn't ask for your advice on that in this thread. Yes, she has made threads talking about it but that's not the case here. She was only relating her situation to myinnerslut.

I know B. personally. B. isn't the "BAD" person you think. On paper he looks bad, but if he was that bad of a person, I would have done told her and suggested an alternative for her. I know everything that he has done to her; I know exactly how she feels about him; I know exactly how much it hurt me to see her miserable like she was when B. went away for awhile; and I know how much she loves him.

As my mother has always told me, if you don't have something good to say don't say anything at all.

 

[minx1]

You called for Kitty? Well, here I am!

Okay for everyone who wants to say something bad about Bunny's relationship with B. First of all, she didn't ask for your advice on that in this thread. Yes, she has made threads talking about it but that's not the case here. She was only relating her situation to myinnerslut.

I know B. personally. B. isn't the "BAD" person you think. On paper he looks bad, but if he was that bad of a person, I would have done told her and suggested an alternative for her. I know everything that he has done to her; I know exactly how she feels about him; I know exactly how much it hurt me to see her miserable like she was when B. went away for awhile; and I know how much she loves him.

As my mother has always told me, if you don't have something good to say don't say anything at all.

You are right of course Bi-Kitty, Bunny didn't ask for advice, but she did do what many of us do here and relate our own circumstances in a thread. Rightly or wrongly, of course that then involves her situation in discussion, you know. The thing about this board is you read things across different threads, you don't simply compartmentalise them and keep what was said in one thread completely separate to another, particularly if they relate to a person who appears to be having a difficult time.

You are spot on about what your mum said. My nan used to say something similar.....she would advice me that if I didn't want my friends and family, the people who care for me, to take my side then I should keep my own counsel on some things. When I was much younger I split with someone and involved all my friends and family, they saw how much it hurt me. When I forgave him and got back with him, it was far more difficult for them to let go of the pain he had caused me...because they had only my version of events.

I haven't actually commented on Bi-Bunnys situation, but I have to say if you refer to your own circumstances in a thread, be prepared for comments from concerned people and friends......it's the nature of the beast.

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[BiBunny]

Very true... flip side of that, however, is if you open yourself up on a public forum, you have no control of how people will respond.

There's an easy remedy to that, isn't there?

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[intothewoods]

You are right of course Bi-Kitty, Bunny didn't ask for advice, but she did do what many of us do here and relate our own circumstances in a thread. Rightly or wrongly, of course that then involves her situation in discussion, you know. The thing about this board is you read things across different threads, you don't simply compartmentalise them and keep what was said in one thread completely separate to another, particularly if they relate to a person who appears to be having a difficult time.

You are spot on about what your mum said. My nan used to say something similar.....she would advice me that if I didn't want my friends and family, the people who care for me, to take my side then I should keep my own counsel on some things. When I was much younger I split with someone and involved all my friends and family, they saw how much it hurt me. When I forgave him and got back with him, it was far more difficult for them to let go of the pain he had caused me...because they had only my version of events.

I haven't actually commented on Bi-Bunnys situation, but I have to say if you refer to your own circumstances in a thread, be prepared for comments from concerned people and friends......it's the nature of the beast.

I completely agree. And fwiw, when I get criticism from friends, I hate it. I try to force myself to look at their point of view, and ask myself if there's any truth there.

I know I always harp on the age thing, but I do think it's important to remember we're all in different places in our life. Even if B is the devil incarnate, maybe the relationship will be a learning experience for Bunny. Maybe it will be a learning experience for B. Who knows.

 

[BiBunny]

Two options, really- either accept the advice and act on it (when the advice is heavily weighed in one direction, odds are it's good advice ), or stop discussing things you aren't ready to hear other's opinions about.

Notice that for the 2 years I struggled with my non-relationship LDR, I almost never mentioned it? Y'all would have crucified me, had you known some of the shit I put up with, and I would have continued to make excuses and ignored everyone, until I was ready to draw a line in the sand.

There were people in real life who supported me, while stating their non-support of that relationship, and I love them for being patient and reminding me I was worth more than I was getting, while letting me try until I couldn't try any longer. My best friend wasn't thrilled with LDR guy by the time I'd known him 3 months. She didn't cut him down, but she never backed off from telling me I deserved better, either... if she'd blown smoke up my ass, she wouldn't have been my Friend.

Notice I didn't actually ask for advice, either. If I had, it would be a different story. I've started threads before in which I DID want the input of others. This time, I was simply offering mis my thoughts in this thread. If I'd started my own thread about it, at least I could've been expecting this little intervention. I appreciate the thought, but it kind of seems that there are some people who like to take every opportunity they can to play the "I-told-you-so" game under the guise of being the caring community people.

I also rather resent the implication that Kitty's not a good friend simply because she's not joining in the universal condemnation of B. I hate to point out the obvious, but she knows him, and no one else here does. She's the only person here besides me who'd recognize him if she passed him on the street. For that reason, I think she'd have a bit of an insight that you do not have. She is the best friend I've ever had, and I won't stand for anyone saying, however veiled, that she is not.

I don't usually get annoyed at what people say on the Internet, but damn. This wasn't even my thread. We've totally hijacked the original one with a tangent that really has less than nothing to do with the topic. Mis, I'm sorry that my input has apparently set this off. If we all want to trash Bunny's relationship, let's start a new thread to do so, so that mis can continue hers if she feels like it. At least that way, I'll know not to even bother opening the damn thing.

For the record, I'll try to refrain from even mentioning he-whose-name-should-not-be-spoken from now on. No offense to anyone here, but when I want your advice, I'll ask for it. That much should be obvious, since I've not been previously shy in asking when I felt I needed it. Otherwise, I'm doing a perfectly fine job of fucking up my own life without anyone else's assistance. I'll appreciate it if you continue to let me do so until I feel the need to complain about it. Then, you'll have every right to bitch at me for my choices. Thank you.

I won't be adding any more to this thread. I've tried to bow out gracefully several times, but my mouth doesn't listen to my brain when it should. Feel free to carry on amongst yourselves, but I can see this is getting nowhere.

 

[FurryFury]

Two options, really- either accept the advice and act on it (when the advice is heavily weighed in one direction, odds are it's good advice ), or stop discussing things you aren't ready to hear other's opinions about.

Notice that for the 2 years I struggled with my non-relationship LDR, I almost never mentioned it? Y'all would have crucified me, had you known some of the shit I put up with, and I would have continued to make excuses and ignored everyone, until I was ready to draw a line in the sand.

There were people in real life who supported me, while stating their non-support of that relationship, and I love them for being patient and reminding me I was worth more than I was getting, while letting me try until I couldn't try any longer. My best friend wasn't thrilled with LDR guy by the time I'd known him 3 months. She didn't cut him down, but she never backed off from telling me I deserved better, either... if she'd blown smoke up my ass, she wouldn't have been my Friend.

I tell my friends once before they get married or move in or whatever my concerns about the people they are thinking they must be with. After that I smile and help them like a friend should.

 

[FurryFury]

Bi Bunny and Bi Kitty,

I'm sorry you've been hurt and/or pissed off on this thread.

*HUG*

 

[myinnerslut]

to bunny and kitty (hello again) : im sorry you got jumped on. really really sorry. thank you so much for your adice and support even though it put you in a position to be attacked or judged.

anyway, im back from my overnight with A and fuck im sore! he teased me for hours and hours and hours on end, never letting me forget how horny i was for mor then a few minutes. this lasted from yesturday when i got there untill a few hours ago when i finally got to cum. everything he did this entire weekend was designed to keep me turned on, his voice, his words, his actions, the toys involved (all day today i had anal beads and large ben wah beads in when he wasnt using me), everything.

we were both on the top of our our D/s game (calm down guys, its just an expression, its not a game) this weekend. everything felt so perfect. i felt completly owned. i even slept with my ankles and wrists bound for the first time with only some minor issues (i woke up in the middle of the night and panicked becuase i didnt remember where i was for a minute and couldnt move).

so, the week is jsut about over, and i say we came out much stronger then we went in. thank you all for your support and ideas. you helped me get through a very frightning and vulnerable few days.

 

[Chris_Xavier]

Glad you are feeling re-vitalized and renewed!

 

[FurryFury]

I'm glad you are happy right now!

*hug*

 

[minx1]

Glad you had a good weekend Mis. I hope things continue to go well for both of you