Questions for a Master

[SubspaceQuester]

Hi, I'm really new to the BDSM community and am interested in writing a bondage novel and a queston

I understand there a different fetishes in BDSM. Are there different terms of bondage?

What attracts you about a sub? (a bit out there as a question but I'm curious about the different reponses)

 

[Sir_Winston54]

Hi, I'm really new to the BDSM community and am interested in writing a bondage novel and a queston

I understand there a different fetishes in BDSM. Are there different terms of bondage?

What attracts you about a sub? (a bit out there as a question but I'm curious about the different reponses)

Why would you be interested in writing a novel about a subject about which you (apparently) know nothing? Doesn't that just set you up for abject failure?

 

[Myskaninen]

I think it is very different depending on the subs personality after all all subs are not the same

 

[SubspaceQuester]

Why would you be interested in writing a novel about a subject about which you (apparently) know nothing? Doesn't that just set you up for abject failure?

I did mention that I'm new to the community... not ignorant. Please read more carefully next time.

SubspaceQuester

 

[Homburg]

Bondage terminology - yes, loads. In fact, it is beyond the scope of a post on a message board to go into the terminology. This is because bondage borrows heavily from the vanilla rope-use world, and their terminology is extensive to begin with. An evening spent with google will probably do better than asking here, as the question is overly broad.

Attractive in a sub - the same things that are attractive in vanilla relationship, plus the added factor of submissive/slave nature. It boils down to compatibility and interest, just like vanilla folk. Kink is just a factor.

 

[Scotsman69]

I only tackle stories when I'm absolutely sure I know the ground throroughly, personally. Even more so for novels.

Mais chacun a son gout....

 

[MichaelWest]

Not to be difficult, but for example I regard myself as a Dominant, not a Master because a Master is generlly a person with a slave while I am in relationship with a submissive. I say this to demonstrate that the BDSM moniker is a term of art and has been given a great deal of shaded meaning and is very subjective to the individual and groups involved.

Bondage for me is about art and control. Sometimes I just like how the ropes or restraints look, or how she looks in them, other times I want to control the bottom or restrict movement or create the feeing of helplessness to create erotic tension or arousal. In the later the "bondage" might be as simple as holding their wrists together over their head or holding them tightly by the hair, no ropes or cuffs or anything more than my own hands.

I believe Homburg sai it best, I seek as a submissive someone I want for a relationship, desiring they be interested and willing to be submissive to me. But in play I could simply tie up a bottom for the experience of it, it might be erotic but not a relationship or even fully sexual for either of us. They it is more like finding a good person to play cards with, they simple need to be fun, available and interested.

 

[Adakgirl]

Ohhh you are not being difficult at all, nice post. *sqiggles in chair*

 

[Adakgirl]

I did mention that I'm new to the community... not ignorant. Please read more carefully next time.

SubspaceQuester

No but you may be ignorant about what kind of effort and knowledge it takes to write a non-fiction novel.

 

[Dosxx82256]

No but you may be ignorant about what kind of effort and knowledge it takes to write a non-fiction novel.

Or he/she might not be. Who are you to say he/she might ignorant about anything?

 

[SimonBrooke]

Hi, I'm really new to the BDSM community and am interested in writing a bondage novel and a queston

I understand there a different fetishes in BDSM. Are there different terms of bondage?

What attracts you about a sub? (a bit out there as a question but I'm curious about the different reponses)

There isn't just one BDSM community, and there are lots of people who use some aspects of BDSM in their sexual practise who aren't part of a BDSM 'community' at all, but are more or less isolated individuals (and, indeed, many of them will deny that they're 'really' into BDSM at all). So yes there are different terms, particularly when you get into communities which are interested in specific traditions of bondage such as kinbaku, but I wouldn't get hung up on them. Unless your characters are members of an established BDSM group it's quite likely they'll have their own terminology.

Beyond different terms, however, there are different purposes. Some people practise bondage as an end in itself - again, particularly with highly ritualised styles of bondage like the Japanese - and the bound submissive may end up unfuckable, which makes people like me (who don't see bondage as an end in itself) slightly bemused. The objective is to create a work of art - a binding which is aesthetically pleasing itself and forces the body of the bound person into an aesthetically pleasing posture. This sort of binding takes a long time, a lot of rope, and (generally) the co-operation of the person being tied.

The alternate approach is to see bondage as a means of preparing the submissive for sex or punishment. In this approach the dominant is more interested in securing a (possibly unco-operative) pyl as quickly and firmly (and fuckably) as possible, than in creating pretty patterns. In place of rope, zip-ties, handcuffs, and leather or webbing straps which buckle or clip together quickly, are more likely to be used (although with practise you can rope up an unco-operative pyl pretty quickly and effectively).

If using zip-ties you should use the quick-release type which are used in the forestry industry (and probably a lot of other places, but I get mine from forestry suppliers), rather than the ones used in the electrical industry which only tighten and don't release - bonds which tighten and which you can't get off can be dangerous. Apart from the conventional piston clip used for dog-leads, there are a lot of other clips available which you can adapt. Yacht chandlers sell snap-shackles which are extremely strong and may incorporate swivels; mountaineering shops sell all sorts of snap-hooks. Of course the risk with snap-hooks of any kind is that the bound person may be able to release them - you need to make sure you use them in such a way that she can't.

What attracts me in a sub? Personally? That she's fun, feisty, intelligent, articulate, opinionated and sexy, and that she enjoys having her limits pushed. People who are into BDSM are people first. What attracts us in one another is not fundamentally different from any other group of people.