Question for other women...

[ericahope]

I was traveling around the story index and stumbled upon this story and three following chapters:

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=216227

I was completely sucked in. I think the writer is talented. He kept the story moving with enough detail to keep a plot going but I wasn't over-burdened with needless dialogue, description or action. I also found myself very aroused by it. Basically it's everything a literotica story should be in my mind.

But by the time I got to the end I realized that the basic underlying premise is that all the women in the story are, deep down inside, wanting to be forced to have sex with the main character. It's almost as if the author thinks that women, at heart, really want to be coerced into sex with men even when they outwardly protest.

If men, in general, think like this that's a problem. But I'm less interested in getting into the mind of the author than in getting into my own mind and the minds of other women.

I was completely aroused by the story and the sex scenes, despite the fact that the women are being coerced into the sex and, in the end, love it.

So my question is, do other women find this plot and the sex scenes arousing despite the author's underlying premise or do they find it offensive? Is my mind just a little twisted? (definitely possible!) Does the idea of being coerced into sex intrigue any other women? I would never have said the idea intrigues me and I still probably wouldn't. But I was totally aroused by the fictional characters being coerced.

Anyway...those are my deep thoughts.

Does anyone else have any?

 

[driphoney]

doubt if mine are deep, but ...

it is something I've thought about since reading and now doing a lame attempt at writing my own stories. The concept of it seems very erotic, yet in practice how can that work out? To be pushed into sex when you don't want it, by someone you don't want it with, is NOT erotic, it's rape. Yet, reading it is ... and I do occasionally wish my partner, whom I care for and trust, would be more aggressive, more physical sometimes in real life, but if you have to ask for it ...! Plus it's not his nature. [sigh]

So, why do we like reading it? And is it the age old problem of when does no mean no and no mean yes? Now men are taught that no ALWAYS means no. What is in our nature that makes us find reading it erotic?

Guess I didn't have anything to contribute, just my own curiosity! lol

hmmm....

 

[santasgirl3]

My 2 cents...

While I admit that I like the idea, fantasy-wise, of being forced in some way to have sex, this story did very little for me. I agree that the writing is very good; the situations he shares are not arousing, to me.

So the answer to your question is yes, I do have forced sex fantasies & find them arousing, but not the scenarios this author has used. Maybe if there was some gentleness or effort for the women to have some sort of satisfaction...

 

[ericahope]

While I admit that I like the idea, fantasy-wise, of being forced in some way to have sex, this story did very little for me. I agree that the writing is very good; the situations he shares are not arousing, to me.

So the answer to your question is yes, I do have forced sex fantasies & find them arousing, but not the scenarios this author has used. Maybe if there was some gentleness or effort for the women to have some sort of satisfaction...

Thanks for the response. I should have clarified and said the first two sex situations were more arousing than the last one with the three women. That one did the least for me.

But I'm glad to know it's not just me who's aroused by the idea of coerced sex.

 

[ericahope]

it is something I've thought about since reading and now doing a lame attempt at writing my own stories. The concept of it seems very erotic, yet in practice how can that work out?

What is in our nature that makes us find reading it erotic?

hmmm....

Some good questions there. How does one write what is essentially a rape scene and make it erotic? How can someone enjoy reading about something that, in reality, is awful? I suppose because we're not reading about real life people and can divorce ourselves from any negative ramifications. (i.e. reading about real life coerced sex is not erotic at all to me)

As for your second question, I don't know. It scares me a little to even think about it. Are we all, deep down inside, evil beings? Has society coerced us into attempting to behave well? I guess those are pretty deep philosophical questions probably best left to another forum...

Erica

 

[ejls]

I am also attacted to the non-consent stories. I have often asked myself why. Is it because so many times we woman have to be in control? Are we attracted to the helplessness? And maybe because it is just fantasy, we can enjoy reading about it. I certainly do not enjoy reading about actual rapes, in the paper.

Great questions and comments, ladies.

 

[emap]

Rape fantasies are common among women, and some guys. Sometimes what they are looking for is more of a BDSM fantasy though those are usually the people who plot out every single little thing they have to do every day, or executives.

Usually though, what is desired is an excuse to just lay back and let everything happen, no input needed. Helps that rougher sex can be incredibly enjoyable when your in the mood for it.

 

[pittsburghfan]

Excellent and thought provoking threat ladies! This talk made me stop and think about some of the roleplay sex that my gf and I have that is somewhat related to erica's deep way of thinking. Maybe yoo ladies can help me understand my gf's behavior....

Occasionally, she initiates a non-consent role play. Though the locations and settings may change, what is consistent is that she has us pretend that we are strangers. Ulitmately, i end up taking her against her will (at least in the beginning) and having my way with her totally. She acts as if she is helpless to stop me. In fact, the only time that I am ever allowed to give her anal sex is during one of our non-consent roleplays. She screams and screams, but won't allow me to pull out until she has a mind-blowing orgasm (with the help of her fingers or a vibrator teasing her clit).

When we aren't doing that kind of roleplay and I want to do her ass, she stops me and incredibly says that she doesn't like anal sex!!??

Please help me understand how that woman's mind works. Thank you.

 

[CorsetLvr]

It is my belief that many women have two basic types of fantasies. The first is the "wouldn't that be nice" variety, perhaps based on some memories of favorite sexyal experiences with appropriate enhancements to make them into some osrt of ideal experience. That basically describes a lot of my writing. Realistic experiences with a fair degree of embellishment.

The other kind is what I call the "deep dark" fantasies. These tend to be those that are best described as "deniable." In other words, the women may have a hard time admitting them to her best friend, or even themselves. They only tend to come out when someone is deep in "fantasy land." Rape or nonconsent fantasies would fall into this category. While the person having the fantasy may be repelled by the idea in reality, they are often turned on by them in fantasy. I think this is best demonstrated by the popularity of the "bodice ripper" romantic novel genre. What is commonly described as seduction in these novels is easily redfined as the kind of consensual sex that is common in the story that was originally mentioned. To my way of thinking, the only real difference is the explicit nature of the narrative.

 

[Tanuki]

I love those stories in fantasy, but that doesn't mean they're appealing in reality. I suppose for some guys it's similar to how they love to play war games, but put the same men in a real shootout and they won't be enjoying themselves.

Fantasy is fun because there's no danger, and because it always goes the way you want it, at least if you're writing or thinking it yourself.

I find some stories too realistic to be much fun, but this author is more light hearted, and his stories don't read like real events.

 

[Tanuki]

I love those stories in fantasy, but that doesn't mean they're appealing in reality. I suppose for some guys it's similar to how they love to play war games, but put the same men in a real shootout and they won't be enjoying themselves.

I'm getting deja vu. Is this a robot spam person?

 

[emap]

Excellent and thought provoking threat ladies! This talk made me stop and think about some of the roleplay sex that my gf and I have that is somewhat related to erica's deep way of thinking. Maybe yoo ladies can help me understand my gf's behavior....

Occasionally, she initiates a non-consent role play. Though the locations and settings may change, what is consistent is that she has us pretend that we are strangers. Ulitmately, i end up taking her against her will (at least in the beginning) and having my way with her totally. She acts as if she is helpless to stop me. In fact, the only time that I am ever allowed to give her anal sex is during one of our non-consent roleplays. She screams and screams, but won't allow me to pull out until she has a mind-blowing orgasm (with the help of her fingers or a vibrator teasing her clit).

When we aren't doing that kind of roleplay and I want to do her ass, she stops me and incredibly says that she doesn't like anal sex!!??

Please help me understand how that woman's mind works. Thank you.

Pitt I'm not going to say this is how she works but I am going to point out, us ladies are taught that sex is bad except in marriage. Parents, church both say, no sex until marriage. Granted neither mention anal, at least I don't think they do, though there is something that does make you go eewww at anal, what else you do back there. I refuse to do anal myself, because of that, total eeewww gross no way factor there. Couple that with the simple fact that most rape fantasies are a way to get around something to simply enjoy sex.

No seriously, we're not supposed to enjoy sex, we are simply supposed to lay there accept his orgasm and produce offspring, at least if you listen to the catholic church. Well OK at least one of the church's mentions anal in a roundabout way. Rape fantasies give a woman an excuse to enjoy the sex, since she is being forced she has no say on whether or not she has an orgasm, which is a big reason for wanting sex.

 

[pittsburghfan]

Pitt I'm not going to say this is how she works but I am going to point out, us ladies are taught that sex is bad except in marriage. Parents, church both say, no sex until marriage. Granted neither mention anal, at least I don't think they do, though there is something that does make you go eewww at anal, what else you do back there. I refuse to do anal myself, because of that, total eeewww gross no way factor there. Couple that with the simple fact that most rape fantasies are a way to get around something to simply enjoy sex.

No seriously, we're not supposed to enjoy sex, we are simply supposed to lay there accept his orgasm and produce offspring, at least if you listen to the catholic church. Well OK at least one of the church's mentions anal in a roundabout way. Rape fantasies give a woman an excuse to enjoy the sex, since she is being forced she has no say on whether or not she has an orgasm, which is a big reason for wanting sex.

How did you know that she was a catholic girl??

Your explanation makes a lot of sense to me. I have definately seen that kind puritanical behavior in so many people, including my parents. It makes me wonder sometimes what these people do behind the closed bedroom door. Does she just lay there while he humps her, as you suggested? Or do they do the things that our generation considers to be very normal, things like oral sex, etc.?

Thanks to all that have contributed to this thread. It sure has me thinking....

 

[emap]

Actually I didn't, I was using the catholic views on sex as an example. Generally best to not think about what your parents do in bed though.

However if it will make you feel better, all forms of sex have been done since before there have been records made of sex practices. Not to mention prostitution, which is probably the entire reason for no sex before marriage, if it's a sin to have sex without being married, your not going to hire a prostitute are you.

 

[Guest]

Thanks for the response. I should have clarified and said the first two sex situations were more arousing than the last one with the three women. That one did the least for me.

I hope you don't mind if I throw an idea into the ring, ladies. ericahope's post above, and emap's comment that

us ladies are taught that sex is bad except in marriage.

got me to wondering if there was a common element in the first two situations that was lacking in the the third, and whether that common element might be what made them more appealing.

On a quick read, I noticed that the women in the first two had been "caught" red-handed in sexual situations--the first having cheated on her partner, the second caught masturbating. Both were obviously uneasy, if not ashamed, about their behavior (or at least being caught at it). Tiffany, in the third situation, didn't follow that pattern. That led me to wonder whether punishment--forced sex--for being sexual (i.e., bad) might not be a turn-on for some ladies.

Feel free to scoff, sneer, or otherwise disparage. Just a thought.

 

[BossySon21a]

But by the time I got to the end I realized that the basic underlying premise is that all the women in the story are, deep down inside, wanting to be forced to have sex with the main character. It's almost as if the author thinks that women, at heart, really want to be coerced into sex with men even when they outwardly protest.

If men, in general, think like this that's a problem.

I'd like to add a point from a male POV, most of us don't think that, including most men who have fantasies of forcing sex, just as I feel quite confident that most women who indulge in rape fantasies don't really want to endure such thing in reality.

The thing about any fantasy is that no matter how 'out of control' the situation fantasized about, by definition as a fantasy there is in fact complete control. That's true of those men who fantasize about being 'forced' bya woman, too, or those men who have cuckold fantasies or extreme BDSM fantasies or whatever.

(I grant there is a handful of people who have dangerously compulsive fantasies they can't stop thinking about, but they are a small group. It's also not to say that sexual fantasies are never harmful, because like anything in life they can be, under some circumtances. But that's not the usual thing.)

A lot of fantasies are counterpoint to fears or guilt, of one sort or another. For just one ex, a lot of men are raised to believe that women don't like sex, and only do it out of either a sense of obligation or ulterior motives or the like, which creates an association of guilt in their minds for even asking their girl or their wife to do it. They may know intellectually that this is irrational, but it's hard to set aside years of conditioning.

This is one root (among others) of the fantasy of the girl who is either ready to have sex at the drop of a stocking or the 'secretly wants to be forced' fantasy in men.

 

[sexymom]

Token Resistance

Many women are taught as girls to put up at least a token resistance, even when the look forward to sex; allowing their resistance to be overcome slowly but steadily. I have to admit this turns me on- not with strangers, but there are many situations where you feel you should resist or delay. How many times have you heard things like "not here- it's too public", "the kids aren't asleep yet", "I have to go to work in a few minutes and I don't want to go in with that 'just got laid' look."

In my definition, this isn't rape. It can be really exciting as a developing, and progressively erotic, process.

 

[CorsetLvr]

Many women are taught as girls to put up at least a token resistance, even when the look forward to sex; allowing their resistance to be overcome slowly but steadily. I have to admit this turns me on- not with strangers, but there are many situations where you feel you should resist or delay. How many times have you heard things like "not here- it's too public", "the kids aren't asleep yet", "I have to go to work in a few minutes and I don't want to go in with that 'just got laid' look."

In my definition, this isn't rape. It can be really exciting as a developing, and progressively erotic, process.

I think you have just defined the fine line between seduction and rape. Women of my generation were taught they shouldn't be asserive about their sexuality and perhaps even submissive. This is something that I have gladly unlearned over the year.

 

[DanishGirl]

The underlying premise you describe is to me a variation on the female slut theme. To me the female slut as a concept is a manifestation of the fantasy that there are women who deep down wants to be used by men, that their real pleasure comes not from their own experiences, but from the pleasure they give others. Thus if a man wants to force them to sex that actually becomes the sluts deepest wish. A more extreme view is that all women are really sluts, they just have to be liberated from the moral restrains of society and their upbringing.

I am a female that likes reading about dominating men and their sluts. I do not see myself in the role of the sluts in the stories. What I like is to go back and forth between the head of the man and woman throughout the story. I need both sides of the story to get worked up.
To me these stories are not about something I want to experience. I feel they are a way of toying with roles and extreme situations.

To me these stories are a bit like horror stories. I love a good scary movie, but I sure would not want to be in a situation like that in real life! The fact that I like to be scared by fiction does in no way mean it want those scary acts to happen to me or anybody else in real life.
I feel this distinction is somewhat accepted in other fictional genres (crime stories, horror, sad stories about illness and dying, sci-fi stories etc.) but somehow not for erotic stories. It is strange that these are the only stories where we feel that the themes of the fiction that we like should be directly transferrable to our real life. I actually think that the strength of erotic stories often is that we are allowed to enjoy storylines, scenes and characters far from our real life and desires!

I like stories with an element of control – both when forced upon someone and when given voluntary. I am fascinated by the idea of someone wanting (or at least accepting) to be degraded. That is one of the things I find fascinating about female sluts; they never get enough even though common sense tells us they should. (This is the marvel of fiction; always getting the response you want)

Anyways the slut fantasies have been with me for a very long time. From way back before I even knew the word slut. Some of my very first fantasies revolved around this subject. I spend many years building up to each fantasy by telling myself that it was ok to fantasize about women being dominated by men even if I did not want to be dominated myself and if I got sick of the mere thought of other women in real life having to experience what I put my fantasy girls through.
After many years I have finally come to terms with the fact that some of my fantasies are dark bizarre and meant to always stay fantasies. I can now enjoy fantasies and stories about these themes without the constant feeling that I have to justify to myself that I only like it as long as it stays a fantasy – I know that to be a fact an thus are free to just enjoy the story.

About the story you mention: I did not find it so hot. But I felt the general question about the premise was worth commenting on anyway.

In conclusion I don’t have a problem with a story that has the premise that women wants to be forced to sex – I do however have HUGE PROBLEMS with people thinking that this premise can in any way shape or form be transferred to real life!

 

[FitfunWoman]

I think you have just defined the fine line between seduction and rape. Women of my generation were taught they shouldn't be assertive about their sexuality and perhaps even submissive. This is something that I have gladly unlearned over the year.

Indeed, that we were not even supposed to do anything so forward as initiate sex or be overt in our desires! My dear old mother once told me that a wife's place with such things was to be, and I quote, "available" to her husband. I unlearned that little message when I divorced, and have had a much more fulfilling romantic life since then.

 

[val85]

For me, it's all about getting what I want while making the man think that it is something that I don't necessarily want to do and that he's turning me into his slut at that moment and that it is more special.

 

[kskittles]

Non-consensual sex is appealing ONLY as a fantasy. No one wants to be forced to do anything against their will in reality. Not genuinely against their will, anyway. I've playraped or pretended to fight off a sex partner, but it was a fantasy.

The one time I actually sat down and watched an old James Bond film, I saw this same thing. He forced the woman into kissing, and physically restrained her until she gave in and they had sex. By today's standards, he raped her. I just don't get it.

 

[agedmac]

I think you have just defined the fine line between seduction and rape. Women of my generation were taught they shouldn't be asserive about their sexuality and perhaps even submissive. This is something that I have gladly unlearned over the year.

to BUMP an older thread started by a very sexy woman

My favorite book title was Carrie Fisher's, Surrendering the Pink. Ultimately, a 'woman' seems to think (at least from my generation and prior to that) that she is 'surrendering' her womanhood through penetrative sex. I'm not sure the 20-somethings see it the same way though.

But I hate the 'non-consensual' story that has the most unrealistic statement in them, after the rapist/intruder/date got his hand inside her pants her 'body betrayed her' and she became wet and wanted him.

Bull! First, in fear, the woman is not likely to get wet; maybe just the opposite and from what we 'know' about rapists it is the refusal of even her body to 'accept' what is going on that IS rape. But even IF her 'body betrayed her' (which I doubt), where does the "I want this to happen" occur. Nope. Don't buy it and I suspect there might be fewer guys out there willing to do 'date rape drugs' or 'get her drunk' thinking that all he has to do is 'touch her a little' to get the reaction he wants. Wrong.

On the other hand, do we guys sometimes believe her 'refusal' is really a convenient ploy to 'allow him' to 'take her'? Yeah, and growing up even in the 1960s, I knew too many girls that said no, who told me months or years later, why did you stop? ARGGGHHHH! Because I was told that no meant NO!

 

[lesbiaphrodite]

I find the non-consent thing revolting. It doesn't turn me on in any way, shape or form.

 

[john-the-author]

I find the non-consent thing revolting. It doesn't turn me on in any way, shape or form.

It doesn't do anything for me, either.