Puns

[mnbreastluver]

Though humble in secular matters, the minister had an altar ego.

 

[done_got_old]

Half of a large intestine: 1 semicolon

 

[mnbreastluver]

Circus dogs fly through the air with the greatest of fleas

 

[Ask For More]

There's more remedies for premature ejaculation coming soon.

 

[mnbreastluver]

The magazine about ceiling fans went out of business due to low circulation.

 

[done_got_old]

During the performance of a high school drama class at the local theatre, the stage floor was damaged resulting in a distinct hole.

Subsequent acts managed to avoid the damaged area until Billy, juggling bowling pins, accidentally stepped through the hole up to his knee.

He apologized to the audience for his clumsiness. But a heckler in the back of the theater shouted, "Don't worry, Billy! It's just a stage you're going through!"

 

[mnbreastluver]

During the performance of a high school drama class at the local theatre, the stage floor was damaged resulting in a distinct hole.

Subsequent acts managed to avoid the damaged area until Billy, juggling bowling pins, accidentally stepped through the hole up to his knee.

He apologized to the audience for his clumsiness. But a heckler in the back of the theater shouted, "Don't worry, Billy! It's just a stage you're going through!"

The two shoemakers got married because they were sole mates.

 

[done_got_old]

The two shoemakers got married because they were sole mates.

The nudist was acquitted of indecent exposure because nobody could pin the wrap on her.

 

[mnbreastluver]

What do you call a rich barber? A shearholder!

 

[Ask For More]

What do you call a rich barber? A shearholder!

A cut above the rest.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

My first job was in an orange juice factory, but I got canned.

Mostly because I couldn't concentrate.

 

[Cymru6969]

She was only a horsemen’s daughter, but all the cow men knew her.

 

[done_got_old]

I got a job working in a hayfield. After one day I bailed.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Stealing my computer files rarely gets my back up.

 

[done_got_old]

I used to be a marathon runner, but couldn't stand the agony of de feet.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

Did you hear about the plant in the Math Library?

It grew square roots.

 

[done_got_old]

They won't know who robbed the Scotch factory until they check the tape.

 

[mnbreastluver]

If someone sued over luggage, it could be a suit suit or a case case.

 

[done_got_old]

Why do some people hate puns? Because they are laughtose intolerant!

 

[done_got_old]

I touched an electric eel the other day. It was shocking.

 

[mnbreastluver]

I relish the fact that you've mustard the strength to ketchup to me.

 

[done_got_old]

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

 

[done_got_old]

The other day I was in a hurry to go outside...

In my haste I ran into the screen door and strained myself!

 

[Ask For More]

The other day I was in a hurry to go outside...

In my haste I ran into the screen door and strained myself!

I'm sure you'll feel fine afterwards.

 

[done_got_old]

I'm sure you'll feel fine afterwards.

When the trucker tried to salvage metal from batteries, he was overcome by D-cell fumes and threw up in the zinc.