Puns

[L8tnIt]

I was walking throught my town's Red Light District when I had a THOT

 

[done_got_old]

https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/126485397_10216846460025476_330157897142155806_n.jpg?_nc_cat=101&ccb=2&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=btHJIiA_AXMAX_famsz&_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-1.xx&oh=272faab200c795c0032d9ad14943ffad&oe=5FE1071E

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you ask a gay person their sexuality you won’t get a straight answer.

 

[done_got_old]

My parents wanted me to become a gastroenterologist when I went to college, but I just couldn't stomach that.

 

[done_got_old]

What do you call an alcoholic eating grapes?

Impatient

 

[done_got_old]

I feel so strongly about graffiti in toilet stalls, I’ve signed a partition.

 

[done_got_old]

https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/127223189_3439040359550305_2937394226139459491_n.jpg?_nc_cat=100&ccb=2&_nc_sid=730e14&_nc_ohc=1TsaNahQDCUAX82Dbub&_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-1.xx&oh=ad18f373ce27eee5bfe79f7b6aa1146f&oe=5FE8C3D5

 

[done_got_old]

https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/131247688_3470294216424919_6439050410537015917_n.jpg?_nc_cat=111&ccb=2&_nc_sid=730e14&_nc_ohc=TSTKtebytboAX-K9bjZ&_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-1.xx&oh=0aa5245a0639ac7176b31a087ec36b4a&oe=5FFABECB

 

[done_got_old]

Due to the massive increase in
deliveries, FedEx and UPS have joined forces
and are now FedUp!​

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you fall from improperly erected scaffolding, the cause of the accident might be erectile disfunction.

 

[peterherring425]

What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.

 

[done_got_old]

https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/132329012_3496752633779077_6209223327783587864_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&ccb=2&_nc_sid=730e14&_nc_ohc=V7e73YWgXOwAX8k60kD&_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-1.xx&oh=3a1b42da5a0d0d181d9dc9d5bb8ed046&oe=600648A3

 

[peterherring425]

My girlfriend thought I'd never be able to make a car out of spaghetti… You should've seen her face when I drove pasta!

 

[mnbreastluver]

If shopping turns you on then you're buysexual.

 

[done_got_old]

https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/131534367_3499071160213891_8376289693032027200_n.jpg?_nc_cat=102&ccb=2&_nc_sid=730e14&_nc_ohc=5fImQwm2uFUAX-Zm415&_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-1.xx&oh=8b98dfd1c627d99f1566752d2c044c80&oe=6006C6B0

 

[peterherring425]

Did you hear about that cheese factory that exploded in France? There was nothing left but de Brie!

 

[Ask For More]

An opinion without 3.14 is an onion.

 

[done_got_old]

My cousin is a plumber and he tried to fix my broken receptacle/outlet, my neighbor came over and told him to get out of his way, he’s an electrician and conduit better than any plumber can!

 

[done_got_old]

https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/132484179_10218051877908997_4033563468444190696_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&ccb=2&_nc_sid=730e14&_nc_ohc=mnOwjDNJ3hMAX9gszmw&_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-1.xx&oh=6354800bf06ebac92a9ff7287dada488&oe=600F1FA5

 

[peterherring425]

"I have a split personality," said Tom, being frank.

 

[done_got_old]

https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/133941929_3513197505467923_5891677866392414700_n.jpg?_nc_cat=101&ccb=2&_nc_sid=730e14&_nc_ohc=oYKblvcy3Z8AX-DW583&_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-1.xx&oh=f040c47aa2e220264621fbc66e28d326&oe=6010E5FB

 

[done_got_old]

https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/133740386_3522833224504351_4303821094899180139_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&ccb=2&_nc_sid=730e14&_nc_ohc=JpbmHgZ4DAQAX-jANta&_nc_oc=AQkXga6x87m-PBoHt4YyLj5JpZmJg_RXqkkfsn-FkqCUjzIJNSOltN1scHbeC3DToZ3f5KKa4zPeFUP6t_RhvrzX&_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-1.xx&oh=442ebfe17afa1b38ec5a2cae9e23036a&oe=60134C39

 

[peterherring425]

So I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, and he sent me a large goat with a long neck. Turns out I phoned Dial-a-Llama.”

 

[mnbreastluver]

The price of blow up dolls probably went up due to inflation.

 

[Andrewlongcock]

Did you hear that lizards can no longer procreate?

It is a reptile disfunction.