Present tense. Do you like it?

[big_cane_sugar]

The default way that spoken English works is that we begin a story in past tense and shift to present when it gets interesting:

"I went out to the bar last weekend, ordered myself a drink, and I was there just minding my own business when all of the sudden this hot woman comes up and goes hey honey buns, come make me and my friends happy and earn a few bucks in the process. So I'm here like why not."

We shift in other ways too: "there" becomes "here."

Lots of writers use this. For some reason Charlotte Bronte's use of it in Jane Eyre seems to be famous, but maybe a more literary person would know of even better examples. I think most readers don't even notice a writer doing this, just as most English speakers and listeners aren't aware that this is how we tell stories.

My guess is that the reason it offends some readers to see a story begin in present tense is that it feels like the writer is trying to begin right in the exciting part of the story.

My take on it is too bad. I create my narrators as characters, even for 3rd person narration, and if the narrator is the kind of character who would do things in present tense, then present tense it is. It's one of those things where I don't feel like I'm deciding this, I'm realizing what a particular narrator would do.

Some people won't like my stories but the readers that do are the ones that matter to me, and those readers will either consciously understand or just intuitively feel why things are the way they are.

Edit: The stuff about present/past is not my own idea. I took a class about teaching grammar to ESL learners and one of the things the course taught us in that in spoken English we usually use tense to indicate our emotional distance (or desired emotional distance, or the emotional distance we desire to represent ourselves as having) from a situation, not the actual time of the event relative to the present. Think "Oh no you didn't" vs "Oh no you don't." Same with future tense: "I'm going to the store" can mean next year I'm going to the store; the difference between that and "I'll go to the store" is that the former is meant to convey more certainty, like you're so sure you will go to the store that in your own mind you're essentially already on your way.

 

[old_prof]

The default way that spoken English works is that we begin a story in past tense and shift to present when it gets interesting:

"I went out to the bar last weekend, ordered myself a drink, and I was there just minding my own business when all of the sudden this hot woman comes up and goes hey honey buns, come make me and my friends happy and earn a few bucks in the process. So I'm here like why not."

We shift in other ways too: "there" becomes "here."

Lots of writers use this. For some reason Charlotte Bronte's use of it in Jane Eyre seems to be famous, but maybe a more literary person would know of even better examples. I think most readers don't even notice a writer doing this, just as most English speakers and listeners aren't aware that this is how we tell stories.

My guess is that the reason it offends some readers to see a story begin in present tense is that it feels like the writer is trying to begin right in the exciting part of the story.

My take on it is too bad. I create my narrators as characters, even for 3rd person narration, and if the narrator is the kind of character who would do things in present tense, then present tense it is. It's one of those things where I don't feel like I'm deciding this, I'm realizing what a particular narrator would do.

Some people won't like my stories but the readers that do are the ones that matter to me, and those readers will either consciously understand or just intuitively feel why things are the way they are.

Thanks for this post. I was re-reading an older story of mine and realized I had done this in a way. I was horrified that I screwed it up that badly, but it felt right.

I'm still not sure if what I did was okay. I started the story in present day, in present tense. Than it goes after a few hundred words into a flash back 42 years earlier, in past tense, which I think emphasizes the flash back nature. But after a few paragraphs it jumps forward four weeks, where I shift back into present tense and stay with it for the next 20+K words. I do finally jump back out of the flash back, although briefly. I then do a second flashback, that is much shorter and almost all narration written in past tense, before returning back to the present (tense and time frame) to finish the story.

By the way, isn't starting right in the action supposed to be a good thing for a story to do?

 

[StillStunned]

I think the light casual tone makes it work, but there is a bit of a problem arising in the second sentence. The narrator can see into the future. The narrator knows what will happen to Eddie after the events being narrated, so in some sense the narration must be taking place after the events. That raises the question: why not past tense? It fits more logically with the frame of the narrative.

But since you've started the story with a tone and style that tell the reader, "This is fun, don't take it too seriously," then I think it's OK. If the tone were heavy and serious, I think there would be a problem.

That might be dressed up as present tense, but it's littered with a past tense perspective from the all knowing narrator. It's not in the moment, for me.

2/10 and one point for trying. 3/10 .

As I noted above, the one way I could see a story of any decent length working would be with a slightly mocking omniscient narrator setting the tone and the scene. If I'd continued writing, I assume the emphasis would be on "in the moment" as the story starts to build. As in, more story and less commentary.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

I sometimes use present tense. It seems to work when the story is being narrated by a protagonist who's a distinctive character and who speaks like that naturally.

For a couple examples, see here and here - both start with nearly a page of plot without sex.

Some stories I write and find different sections have ended up as present or past (not to mention first or third person) - if in doubt I'll make it all past tense.

As I noted above, the one way I could see a story of any decent length working would be with a slightly mocking omniscient narrator setting the tone and the scene. If I'd continued writing, I assume the emphasis would be on "in the moment" as the story starts to build. As in, more story and less commentary.

The guy above is slightly mocking, and self-deprecating, but not omniscient.

 

[StillStunned]

The guy above is slightly mocking, and self-deprecating, but not omniscient.

The narrator is supposed to be distinct from Eddie, but I can see how it wasn't clear from the snippet.

 

[Trionyx]

Present tense. Do you like it?​

No, I did not.