SweetDommes
Spoiling our pets
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FungiUg said:Oooh... jitters!
yes, jitters ... but they are getting better (at least right now) cuz I'm exhausted from work ...Prepping for a meeting
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yes, jitters ... but they are getting better (at least right now) cuz I'm exhausted from work ...
SweetDommes
Spoiling our pets
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I'm really beginning to hate people. He bailed ... yet another boy that we really thought would work out ... and he fucking bailed. We've been working towards this for three weeks now (really, since December when we started talking), for nothing. All of the effort that we put into him, just like all the others (except, thank god, for our ghosstie), has been wasted.
For those of you who gave us/me support in my jitters, thanks ... and this is pretty much why I had them - something ALWAYS happens & it doesn't work out. Maybe someday we'll find another one that is actually worth the time and effort that we put into them. For now though, I give up ... to hell with them all, they can fuck themselves - boys suck.
Karen
For those of you who gave us/me support in my jitters, thanks ... and this is pretty much why I had them - something ALWAYS happens & it doesn't work out. Maybe someday we'll find another one that is actually worth the time and effort that we put into them. For now though, I give up ... to hell with them all, they can fuck themselves - boys suck.
Karen
FungiUg
Waves at Cats
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Awww fuck. And I was so looking forward to some good (if exhausted) news too!
I'm sorry hon.
The good news (or is it equally bad news?) is that this happens to everyone, so don't take it personally. My lover gets rather paranoid about it actually.
I'm sorry hon.
The good news (or is it equally bad news?) is that this happens to everyone, so don't take it personally. My lover gets rather paranoid about it actually.
SweetDommes
Spoiling our pets
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FungiUg said:
Why do you think I had the jitters about the meeting? I do know that people pull this kind of bullshit all the time, that it's not personal ... but when less than 1/2 of the ones that we invite actually follow through, and only 1 of those has actually worked out, it gets EXTREMELY discouraging ...
I'm incredibly pissed about this, because we've been talking to this boy since December, tried to meet at the end of Jan/beginning of Feb, but his mom had complications from surgery & he went to take care of her (which, as a nurse, I had no problems with), then we finally get a meeting set up & work fucks it up, then we set it up again, and he told us today that he met another girl this week and wants to see how things go with her ... forgetting that we have put quite a bit of effort into this, forgetting that he has had the plans with us for quite awhile, forgetting a lot of things ... I wished him luck and told him bye, I don't know if I'll even talk to him again - if he thinks that little of us to pull a stunt like this on a moments notice (we were getting ready to head out the door when I checked e-mail & saw it).
FungiUg
Waves at Cats
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mmmm... do any of these ring a bell?
"Sorry, I couldn't get a baby-sitter." (this was with two months notice.)
"My parents turned up for a surprise party, and I couldn't get away." (oh really?)
"I got scared." (marks for honesty)
...or the worst, was just... er... nothing. No show.
My lover deliberately does her best NOT to think about the meeting beforehand, at all, whatsoever. She was really really hurt by one in particular (the surprise party, as it happened), and now just can't handle even imagining it until it actually becomes a reality.
The down-side of this is that she's quite cool and uninvolved until, well, it actually happens. Ah well. At least she still stays open to meeting new people and new ideas. So I don't complain.
It really really really sucks. *hug*
"Sorry, I couldn't get a baby-sitter." (this was with two months notice.)
"My parents turned up for a surprise party, and I couldn't get away." (oh really?)
"I got scared." (marks for honesty)
...or the worst, was just... er... nothing. No show.
My lover deliberately does her best NOT to think about the meeting beforehand, at all, whatsoever. She was really really hurt by one in particular (the surprise party, as it happened), and now just can't handle even imagining it until it actually becomes a reality.
The down-side of this is that she's quite cool and uninvolved until, well, it actually happens. Ah well. At least she still stays open to meeting new people and new ideas. So I don't complain.
It really really really sucks. *hug*
SweetDommes
Spoiling our pets
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Thanks for the support ...
Like I said, I know that we aren't the only ones to go through this, it's just getting very old and very discouraging ... and if we don't find another boy soon, my mom is going to start trying to set me up ...
I think our worst was the guy that we were going to go see instead of having him drive over to see us ... and he told us the day before we were supposed to go that he didn't want us to come because he just couldn't move away from his daughter (of course, we were both already looking for jobs over there & were planning to move to him - which we haven't done with any other boy, but hey, what the hell ...).
Like I said, I know that we aren't the only ones to go through this, it's just getting very old and very discouraging ... and if we don't find another boy soon, my mom is going to start trying to set me up ...
I think our worst was the guy that we were going to go see instead of having him drive over to see us ... and he told us the day before we were supposed to go that he didn't want us to come because he just couldn't move away from his daughter (of course, we were both already looking for jobs over there & were planning to move to him - which we haven't done with any other boy, but hey, what the hell ...).
cellis
Saucy
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You know it works both ways.
After spending time recently trying to develop a relationship with a Domme, I have tasted the same bitter frustation. Things seem to be going well... Plans being made for a meet... and worse than for you... She just disappears...
Not a word... emails go unanswered as well as phone calls... I don't understand this behavior.
I am glad that this happened before we became too attached to her... It is just sad... and being the type to jump to conclusions sometimes... I automatically think this must be something that I have done wrong, even though I know it is not.
It just leaves me with an empty sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. The rejection is uncalled for and unnecessary.
A simple no thanks, I'm not interested would have been so much kinder...
I was not brought up to deal with people this way.
I can feel your pain... I understand your loss.... feeling it myself.
After spending time recently trying to develop a relationship with a Domme, I have tasted the same bitter frustation. Things seem to be going well... Plans being made for a meet... and worse than for you... She just disappears...
Not a word... emails go unanswered as well as phone calls... I don't understand this behavior.
I am glad that this happened before we became too attached to her... It is just sad... and being the type to jump to conclusions sometimes... I automatically think this must be something that I have done wrong, even though I know it is not.
It just leaves me with an empty sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. The rejection is uncalled for and unnecessary.
A simple no thanks, I'm not interested would have been so much kinder...
I was not brought up to deal with people this way.
I can feel your pain... I understand your loss.... feeling it myself.
SweetDommes
Spoiling our pets
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cellis said:You know it works both ways.
After spending time recently trying to develop a relationship with a Domme, I have tasted the same bitter frustation. Things seem to be going well... Plans being made for a meet... and worse than for you... She just disappears...
Not a word... emails go unanswered as well as phone calls... I don't understand this behavior.
I am glad that this happened before we became too attached to her... It is just sad... and being the type to jump to conclusions sometimes... I automatically think this must be something that I have done wrong, even though I know it is not.
It just leaves me with an empty sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. The rejection is uncalled for and unnecessary.
A simple no thanks, I'm not interested would have been so much kinder...
I was not brought up to deal with people this way.
I can feel your pain... I understand your loss.... feeling it myself.
*lots of hugs* I know it works both ways, but it still sucks, doesn't it?
My biggest problem is that I become attached to them ... I mean, with this guy - we supported him when he thought his mother might die while she was in ICU, we supported him through a job change ... and he treats us like it was nothing ... like we are nothing ... and other boys have done just as bad or worse
cellis
Saucy
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SweetDommes said:*lots of hugs* I know it works both ways, but it still sucks, doesn't it?
My biggest problem is that I become attached to them ... I mean, with this guy - we supported him when he thought his mother might die while she was in ICU, we supported him through a job change ... and he treats us like it was nothing ... like we are nothing ... and other boys have done just as bad or worse
You know I understand being scared about starting a new life so to speak... But rudeness and bad manners is unacceptable on any level....
SweetDommes
Spoiling our pets
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cellis said:
Exactly ... and we go through this with every boy - we tell them that if they get nervous, or start to get cold feet - we understand and we'll work with them ... but they have to tell us cuz being a pussy will get them nowhere fast.
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