Post baseless lies about the person above you - Version Three

[Taegul]

He is very, very serious

He went a whole week without shaving in order to get his AV selfie just right.

 

[LinusRules]

He went a whole week without shaving in order to get his AV selfie just right.

Likes to brag to the ladies at bars that he's a pilot. He doesn't tell them that he "self-certified" himself on MS Flight Simulator after he managed to get the Piper Cub on the ground that one time without crashing.

 

[papadoc19]

He is pulling for the Eagles

 

[EmpressJosephine]

He is pulling for the Eagles

He went to the vet and got "fixed."

 

[LinusRules]

He went to the vet and got "fixed."

Josephine's mask is actually her attempt at modernizing the burka for today's avant garde, contemporary woman. Sales continue to slag.

 

[ADesirousKitten]

Josephine's mask is actually her attempt at modernizing the burka for today's avant garde, contemporary woman. Sales continue to slag.

Owns a miniature pony farm, but insists they're all Clydesdales. It makes him feel like a giant.

 

[EmpressJosephine]

Owns a miniature pony farm, but insists they're all Clydesdales. It makes him feel like a giant.

She prefers puppies.

 

[ADesirousKitten]

She prefers puppies.

Hmmm, I volunteer at a shelter walking dogs Saturday morning, so maybe not a lie? Or.... is it?


Empress likes to hoover in the buff, but dusting she only does while wearing latex.

 

[EmpressJosephine]

Hmmm, I volunteer at a shelter walking dogs Saturday morning, so maybe not a lie? Or.... is it?


Empress likes to hoover in the buff, but dusting she only does while wearing latex.

Yes, that's a lie!
(It's the other way around.)

She sells her fur-balls on eBay.

 

[ADesirousKitten]

Yes, that's a lie!
(It's the other way around.)

She sells her fur-balls on eBay.

Perhaps, but only after I've needle-felted them into poop emojis.

Empress sings the Barney the Dinosaur "clean up" song while enjoying personal time.

 

[Taegul]

Perhaps, but only after I've needle-felted them into poop emojis.

Empress sings the Barney the Dinosaur "clean up" song while enjoying personal time.

She uses a ghostwriter for posting on Lit.

 

[Little_Sister]

She uses a ghostwriter for posting on Lit.

Calls and hangs up on me at least twice a day every day.

 

[RedJack81]

Hasn't cur her toenails for 4 years due to an unfortunate incident with some clippers that has left her petrified.

 

[papadoc19]

He is in fact a very chaste Kangaroo

 

[DarkSimian]

Changes into a sweater and sneakers when watching Mr. Rogers

 

[DarkSimian]

Tried to "give" at the office, and is now taking a mandatory sexual harassment seminar

 

[Taegul]

Tried to "give" at the office, and is now taking a mandatory sexual harassment seminar

This cereal killer is at the top of the FBIs Most Wanted list. Frosted Flakes, Fruit Loops, Cap'n Crunch, Lucky Charms....he's slaughtered them all and then some.

 

[johnnieblue44]

This cereal killer is at the top of the FBIs Most Wanted list. Frosted Flakes, Fruit Loops, Cap'n Crunch, Lucky Charms....he's slaughtered them all and then some.

He meant to call himself "Seagull" but that pesky speech impediment raised its head again.

 

[LizVegas79]

He meant to call himself "Seagull" but that pesky speech impediment raised its head again.

His favorite color is white.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

His favorite color is white.

She's actually a nun.

 

[LizVegas79]

She's actually a nun.

I'm a nun with a checkered past out for one last big score thank you very much

He's afraid of the water, but his alter ego isn't.

 

[johnnieblue44]

I'm a nun with a checkered past out for one last big score thank you very much

He's afraid of the water, but his alter ego isn't.

Goes to the crap tables in her town and yells while rolling the dice, "Momma needs a new pair of fuck-me pumps!"

 

[LizVegas79]

Goes to the crap tables in her town and yells while rolling the dice, "Momma needs a new pair of fuck-me pumps!"

Has seen me hitting the tables before lol

 

[Taegul]

Has seen me hitting the tables before lol

She robs banks in her spare time. Pro advice to Liz...traditional banks are more lucrative, those sperm banks aren't as (financially) rewarding.

 

[LizVegas79]

She robs banks in her spare time. Pro advice to Liz...traditional banks are more lucrative, those sperm banks aren't as (financially) rewarding.

Doesn't know that the best skin moisturizer's often hit you in the eye if you aren't careful.