Please help me

[ddyslilfairyprincess]

I am a BBW and am wanting to know how to make myself more sexy. I have self image problems and am coming to terms with my body. In the mean time, I don't know squat on how to be sexy. Someone please help me.

 

[Cipher]

In the Playground area in the Personals section, there's a few BBW threads..go make friends in there. Lots of guys that admire BBW's.

I'm a BBW myself. Being sexy isn't so much how you look. it's an attitude. i have curves and lots of them..i work it..lol if no one likes it, that's thier personal issue. Not mine. I'm comfortable with me. that's all that truly matters.

I'm sure who you are is sexy enough..don't be afraid to get out there and let the world know you've arrived gurlfriend!

 

[christian1971]

not BBW but pleasantly plump!

Try not to be so hard on yourself! Lane Bryent has some very SEXY corsets my Ex G/F was a pleasently plump woman 5'8 about 250lbs and I am only 5'1 and 150lbs. And in Heels she was over 6' and when she had on one of the many corsets and thongs she look incredible. I know this will not help completely or if at all but hope it made you smile. All I know is that you need to feel good about yourself also. Hope it works.

 

[fire_breeze]

I am a BBW and am wanting to know how to make myself more sexy. I have self image problems and am coming to terms with my body. In the mean time, I don't know squat on how to be sexy. Someone please help me.

I know how hard it is to have self-image problems, and then overcoming them. Everybody, I do mean everybody, has them occasionally and some women with the most 'perfect' bodies have them constantly. The key is accepting yourself, change only if YOU want to and not because someone tells you to.

When I think sexy, I always think self confidence and being genuine, regardless of size. Accept yourself (easier said than done, I know) and know that you will have parts of your body that you will never be a fan of. Find some part of your body that you like, and show it off. Maybe you have an incredible cleavage: so wear V-neck sweaters that at once brings out your cleavage and is flattering. Or maybe you have a great rounded butt: find pants and skirts that show off. If you feel good about yourself, then you will be sexy.

Being sexy, in my opinion, is being true to yourself. Sexy is not a one-size fits all mold - everyone is unique, and therefore have the potential to be sexy in their own very individualistic way. Those who are truly sexy are those who stand out because they embrace who they are. The next time you're in a busy place, watch people and take note who YOU find sexy. I will bet that it's someone who walks with confidence, who is beautiful (but not necessarily conventionally pretty) and is remarkable in some way or another.

That being said, for some, taking care of yourself and putting your best face forward can help to boost inner sexiness. Wear what makes you feel comfortable and looks good on you. If you're not sure, then ask a trusted friend to help you to go shopping with you. And if you need confidence bolsters, head off to the Playground: as Cipher said, there are many threads dedicated to BBW.

There is nothing sexier than being yourself, and embracing who you are. That is sexy.

Good luck

 

[lindahotstuff]

I'm not BBW myself but hubby and I love threesomes with BBWs. Like you, many have feelings of low self esteem - usually because someone has made fun of them in the past. You need to get over it. When I or hubby compliment a BBW it is because we genuinely adore the full bodied look and feel, not to make someone feel better. I am sure you get compliments from guys - accept them, revel in them, enjoy your body, touch it and feel it and caress it, love your own body and guys (and girls if you desire them) will repsond in the same way. Dont hide it away, flaunt it hon.

 

[A_Kefka]

I find big women very sexy. Large breasts and nice big butts get me going. I'd say try to find clothes that accent the parts of your body that you like, and maybe that hide the parts you don't (although a belly doesnt' bother me, I don't find it a turn on, but its not a turn off either. It just is, and since it often goes with the other parts I find sexy I'm ok with it).

 

[Derya]

agree with other comments

The comments on the thread are reminders that sexiness is a feeling, a confidence. Know that all size and shapes of people have image discomfort...yours happens to be focused on being a BBW but know you're no less sexy than anyone else and others made differently do not necessarily feel sexier.

The suggestion to wear what is comfortable...DEFINITELY!! Wear materials that YOU enjoy the feel of against your skin or in how they move on you or with you. Wear colors that you like and when you view yourself you say NICE look. Less is not always better when it comes to sexy. Accessorize with things you like and feel fun trying....whatever that be (example: variety of hosiery; hats; jewelry, scarves, shoe styles,garter, underwear you like).

Use scented cleansing and perfume items that you like the aroma of. I find I feel especially sexy when I've used a shampoo, soap, body splash, lotion and cologne all of the same line. Put some things around your person that you find sexy...example if you like candles burn some while your dressing to go out; or if you like certain music play it while you're doing chores. These kind of activities, extras, pampering your sexy side bring you in touch and comfort with it. Put on music when you're alone so you don't feel hesitant and just move to it, however, just feel it, if you love to dance fine but even if not.....there is nothing sexier than a woman's movement. This could help you become more at ease with your self image of your body's movement and thus more confident and sexy. You may find a movement that feels sexy to you....example brushing your hair back with your hand or a way of waving anything not necessarily related to physical size or look and then those movements connect to you feeling good with yourself, your style.

Continue to feed and exercise your mind (in regards to sex yes but all things) always along with your body, sex appeal is the person not the body....a body is sexy and maybe can be made sexier in a lot of ways, but it is a blow up doll without the soul that fills it.

 

[Cathleen]

Body image is a struggle for me as well. I was surprised to find so many men like large women -- it doesn't 'cure' my issues but it helps. The times I feel sexy are the times I feel confident in my own skin; when I like what I'm wearing or take time to put on a little makeup or do something with my hair. It can be a ying and yang thing, too. Maybe it starts in my mind and that may lead to me spend a bit of time on the other things or vice versa but my head must be involved no matter what.

 

[KarennaC]

I used to weigh 250. I lost about a hundred pounds (have gained back about 20; I looked like a freaking skeleton at 150).

I got hit on more when I was 250 than I do now.

Sexy's an attitude, not a look.

 

[MarkMphsTN]

Its about whats between the ears that makes sexy.

 

[infinity706]

If you really want to be sexier, it couldn't hurt to flaunt yourself a bit. An outfit that's a bit revealing will catch the interest of plenty of men and women and they'll probably be checking you out whether they'd admit it to their friends or not. If you're energetic and flirty, you will probably get hit on.

 

[gentelman324]

man, I love me a big girl!

 

[lindahotstuff]

Its about whats between the ears that makes sexy.

This is actually the best advice. Think sexy, be sexy. People are attracted to your mind, the body comes after.

 

[SSLAM]

remember in the old days....women are suppose to be bigger, look at the classic arts. All the women were protrait as heavy sets. Its only the last 80 years or so that the "fashion" world brainwash us to think skinny=sexy. all those lady posters are right "sexy" is all about confidence, don't let ppl and the environment define who you are.

 

[PoeticMusings53]

I am a BBW and am wanting to know how to make myself more sexy. I have self image problems and am coming to terms with my body. In the mean time, I don't know squat on how to be sexy. Someone please help me.

Appropriate-fitting sweaters are always nice on larger body types.

Cleanliness and overall neatness of appearance goes a very long way.

And then just confidence - there's someone out there that will like you for you.

 

[human_male]

I agree the actual bod has little to do with whether or not a woman's sexy. At least to me. Attitude, how she carries herself, confidence, all that.

That doesn't help you of course if you don't have those things and don't know how to go about getting them.

I saw a tv show once about a woman that hosted stipping classes for women. Not pros, ordinary women that wanted to spice things up at home. It was all about how to move, how to make the most of what you've got, how to gain confidence and things of that sort. I don't know if that's something you'd be interested in or how to go about finding such a service, but I wish you well whatever you do.

 

[satindesire]

Long read, but well worth it.

I've been both a scrawny flat-chested girl and a full grown size 12 woman, and recently as I discovered my own journey into womanhood...rarely have I had a shortage of partners or people who found me attractive. What is more important than the weight of a woman in the end, is how she manages to put together her image. Cleopatra, one of the most celebrated sex symbols of the world, was in reality quite plain and average-looking. But her confidence and femininity radiated through her and gave her an inner beauty that completely transformed how other people saw her.

Grace, graciousness and confidence are a lady's strongest and sexiest suits. Take time to manage your image. This isn't just about showering daily and wearing clean shoes, this is about projecting a feminine mystique...A manicured image of sleek, well-cared for womanhood. Treat your body kindly, sleep well, eat well, and don't let price get in the way of pampering yourself. Stop trying to force yourself into some unnatural visage, if you are a large brunette, you will never be a petite blonde and vice versa. Naturalness, men and women alike appreciate this. Work with what God gave you from birth, improve upon it in simple ways, but don't try and force yourself into a mold that isn't you.

I want to share my own journey with you, and in that I'll give you a few tips about how I keep myself looking like a proper trophy wife.

Leave your hair alone. Don't process it in any way, unless it's -absolutely necessary- (more on that later). Dyes, even just highlights can seriously damage the structure of your hair, chemical relaxers or permanents can potentially ruin the texture. If you have curly hair, allow it to be curly. If you have straight hair, allow it to be straight. Nature generally gets it right when it comes to hair color, so allow your own natural, virgin hair to grow out and you will be surprised about how many people make comments on how lovely it is.

My hair used to be an absolutely pathetic wreck. It was frizzy, dull, lifeless, dry and prone to terrible breakage. I did my best to style it, but in the end my over zealousness was ruining one of my best features. Once I stopped dying, straightening, curling, highlighting and you name it, it changed almost like magic. My hair is softer, glossier, and can grow out even longer than before. My hair is totally virgin, uncolored and untouched by chemical process, and falls to my waist in beautiful and rather unusual bronze-colored waves, my mother's hair to be sure. It is one of, if not the very best, of my physical attributes and I am -very- proud of it. In trying to be ANYTHING other than a redhead, I ruined my hair. Don't let that happen to you. If you leave your hair be it will thank you.

Cheap products will be the end of your beauty career (and trust me sweetheart, looking good is a job like any other! Albeit a highly enjoyable one.) so give yourself the okay to get salon-quality styling products such as good shampoos and conditioners, moisturizers, facial exfoliators, cleansers and anti-aging serums. Once you start taking good care of your skin and hair, you will notice the difference a good product makes.

One item I strongly suggest buying is Chi's "Silk Infusion" serum, for hair. I don't know what's in it or how it works, but it literally -SAVED- my hair. You will notice a significant difference in as little as a month on how weighty and full your hair will feel, and how much the shine and manageability returns.

In the end, a good hair stylist is worth their weight in gold. Not only can they point out the products that are worth your time and money, but they can tell you what sort of hair styles you can try, and how to best allow your natural virgin hair to stay in it's absolute peak condition. However, if your natural texture is just out-of-control fluffy curly frizz, then a chemical 'intervention' might be necessary. They can tell you if you should perm or relax your hair, but I'd say 97% of women simply don't need it.

Nice nails aren't something that men often mention when it comes to regarding a woman attractive, but take my word on it, they notice. A classy french manicure is never out of style, so head over to a local salon and get yourself a lovely manicure. Keep your nails done, and you won't regret it. Even on days when you're in jeans and tennis shoes, you can still look fantastically pulled together when you're rocking fantastic nails.

Cosmetics are something all women should at least occasionally partake in. I wear makeup almost every day (unless I'm ill, etc) and it doesn't have to be a lot or obvious to be attractive. A good natural foundation to even out your skin tone is a beauty basic. I really love mineral foundations because they're far more gentle than the chemical-and-mineral oil-laced liquids and cream foundations of the past, and are especially essential for women with breakout-prone or very sensitive, allergic skin. Keep looking at different brands and colors until you find one that EXACTLY matches your skin tone, because a natural effect is what we're after, ultimately. The less it looks like you're wearing makeup, the better.

Cosmetics are a highly personal choice, color and style of cosmetics changes not only by the person, but by the season, setting, and mood of the woman applying. I suggest heading over for a long sit-down (severall, hopefully) over at youtube to search for cosmetic how-to's.

This link is by a young woman who is now an international SUPERSTAR because of her cosmetics tutorials on youtube. Please watch many many many of her videos, because not only is she extremely talented (and quite charming), but she inspires your own cosmetic muse to get out and experiment.

http://www.youtube.com/user/panacea81

So we've got the hair, skin, nails, makeup and confidence down. It's only a matter of time before YOU get mistaken for a trophy wife too!

PM me anytime...I'm in love with talking about crap like this.

 

[starviper]

think sexy and go for it

 

[cd1_christine]

As a lot of people have already said - sexy is an attitude, not an appearance.

Unfortunately, when you have body image issues, thinking sexy can be the most difficult thing for you to do, but it's critical to you both feeling sexy, and being perceived as sexy by others.

This is an online store that sells sexy clothes and lingerie for BBWs.
http://www.biggalslingerie.com

While it's probably not supposed to be an educational and self-worth site, take a gander through it. There are some undeniably sexy women on there that are 250 pounds or more. Look at them. See if you think they're sexy. If you do, and they're roughly the same size as you, what's different about you that you think makes you not sexy? As has been suggested, probably nothing, and it's all in your head. But you've got to realize that yourself, and it can certainly be a difficult thing.


And, you might find yourself some sexy clothes that you like, and will make you think sexier when you're wearing them.

I think my personal favourite that I've found so far is http://www.biggalslingerie.com/TAT-709Edwardian-blue.html.

Yowza!!

 

[Cattypuss]

Nature generally gets it right when it comes to hair color, so allow your own natural, virgin hair to grow out and you will be surprised about how many people make comments on how lovely it is.

Hmmmm... I beg to differ. Before, I had 50% grey and was only 40. After (and for the last year) I have my hair pro-dyed to a combination of shades that look good with my skin and eyebrows (NOT my old natural colour, beause my skin-tone had changed too).

After the first dye-job I lost count of the number of people who said I looked healthier. Before the dye-job my face looked totally washed out. I looked ill.

Also, beg to differ on the damage point. I have fine, dead-straight hair and it was silky and very shiny before the first dye job and it's still just as silky and just as shiny now, after over a year of every-six-weeks dyeing. And btw I use cheap shampoo and conditioner.

One thing I agree on is that a good hairdresser is worth their weight in gold.

 

[Cattypuss]

As a lot of people have already said - sexy is an attitude, not an appearance.

Unfortunately, when you have body image issues, thinking sexy can be the most difficult thing for you to do, but it's critical to you both feeling sexy, and being perceived as sexy by others.

This is an online store that sells sexy clothes and lingerie for BBWs.
http://www.biggalslingerie.com

While it's probably not supposed to be an educational and self-worth site, take a gander through it. There are some undeniably sexy women on there that are 250 pounds or more. Look at them. See if you think they're sexy. If you do, and they're roughly the same size as you, what's different about you that you think makes you not sexy? As has been suggested, probably nothing, and it's all in your head. But you've got to realize that yourself, and it can certainly be a difficult thing.


And, you might find yourself some sexy clothes that you like, and will make you think sexier when you're wearing them.

I think my personal favourite that I've found so far is http://www.biggalslingerie.com/TAT-709Edwardian-blue.html.

Yowza!!

How come those women manage to be so big and not have any cellulite? I'm covered in the stuff (and, btw , that's more of an issue for me in feeling sexy than my size ever could be)

 

[ddyslilfairyprincess]

Great advice!

Everyone has given me some great advice. I am still working on this so keep it cumming..ooops coming.

 

[infinity706]

How come those women manage to be so big and not have any cellulite? I'm covered in the stuff (and, btw , that's more of an issue for me in feeling sexy than my size ever could be)

Well, they're professional models, so they could very well have had plastic surgery.

 

[ihavehope444]

The comments on the thread are reminders that sexiness is a feeling, a confidence. Know that all size and shapes of people have image discomfort...yours happens to be focused on being a BBW but know you're no less sexy than anyone else and others made differently do not necessarily feel sexier.

The suggestion to wear what is comfortable...DEFINITELY!! Wear materials that YOU enjoy the feel of against your skin or in how they move on you or with you. Wear colors that you like and when you view yourself you say NICE look. Less is not always better when it comes to sexy. Accessorize with things you like and feel fun trying....whatever that be (example: variety of hosiery; hats; jewelry, scarves, shoe styles,garter, underwear you like).

Use scented cleansing and perfume items that you like the aroma of. I find I feel especially sexy when I've used a shampoo, soap, body splash, lotion and cologne all of the same line. Put some things around your person that you find sexy...example if you like candles burn some while your dressing to go out; or if you like certain music play it while you're doing chores. These kind of activities, extras, pampering your sexy side bring you in touch and comfort with it. Put on music when you're alone so you don't feel hesitant and just move to it, however, just feel it, if you love to dance fine but even if not.....there is nothing sexier than a woman's movement. This could help you become more at ease with your self image of your body's movement and thus more confident and sexy. You may find a movement that feels sexy to you....example brushing your hair back with your hand or a way of waving anything not necessarily related to physical size or look and then those movements connect to you feeling good with yourself, your style.

Continue to feed and exercise your mind (in regards to sex yes but all things) always along with your body, sex appeal is the person not the body....a body is sexy and maybe can be made sexier in a lot of ways, but it is a blow up doll without the soul that fills it.

Awesome advice, Derya!

I didn't even think about it until you just said so, but putting on my music that I love, dancing around, candles, all the everyday stuff that makes you really "feel", usually makes you feel sexy. And you can indulge in it every day. Practice feeling sexy.

Do what makes you feel good, and it will show!

 

[Noor]

How come those women manage to be so big and not have any cellulite? I'm covered in the stuff (and, btw , that's more of an issue for me in feeling sexy than my size ever could be)

air brushes?

Take up bellydance. I have seen it change how women feel about their bodies in a fairly short time. Its also fun, good exercise and increases your flexibility. There are sexual advantages too!

Do things that make you feel good physically and don't worry how you appear to others, please yourself.
Indulge in sensual pleasures for you. Lush makes a butter cream soap that feels heavenly, I like the Emperor of Ice Cream one.

Also surround yourself with men who love women.