Pick-Up Lines...

[Lil-Brandi]

Yesterday I had a guy tell me "our dimples need to get together sometime". I thought that was so cute! On Friday I had a guy yell out his car window "ride me like a harley on a bumpy road" that was not so cute! LOL The first one could maybe work for me. What pick up lines have people tried on you or have you tried on other people, and have they worked???

 

[Ambrosious]

I would violate you like a parking meter. And (looks at her crotch) Hey look, lunch! Ok, I know it's a box lunch, but still, it's lunch.

 

[KillerMuffin]

"You can be my daughter anytime sweet thang. Daddy's rules are no panties!"

I was moved to commit assault. I can't remember if I actually hit him or if I simply kicked him.

 

[forgetunome]

I know this isn't a joke thread but...aren't most pick up lines the starting of a good joke? So...it reminded me of the following joke...hope you don't object:

Responses to Pick Up Lines


Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

Man: So, wanna go back to my place ?
Woman: Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a
rock?

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

Man: I'd like to call you. What's your number?
Woman: It's in the phone book.
Man: But I don't know your name.
Woman: That's in the phone book too.

Man: So what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: What sign were you born under?
Woman: No Parking.

Man: Hey, baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not Enter

Man: I know how to please a woman.
Woman: Then please leave me alone.

Man: I want to give myself to you.
Woman: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

Man: I can tell that you want me.
Woman: Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you.....to leave.

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy:
Woman: Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die
laughing.

Man: Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot
spots?
Woman: Sorry, I don't date outside my species.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I'd go through anything for you.
Woman: Good! Let's start with your bank account.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?

 

[Lil-Brandi]

ROFLMAO

OMG!!! LOL....I have a feeling this could be definitely one of the funniest threads of the month!!!!

 

[Lil-Brandi]

LOL

Forgetunome,

I love it!! I'm printing them out right now LOL...(now just to remember these replies hmmmm!) Thank you for the laughs, those are great!

 

[Ambrosious]

forgetunome

Yeah she wants me!




To leave her alone? Damn...just damn.

 

[forgetunome]

Anytime Lil-Brandi...glad you got a chuckle...


And as for you Ambrosious...I don't want you to leave me alone...never! ((((((((((Ambrosious))))))))) That hug is on the house!! Next one you have to pay for........with a hug back!!

 

[Ambrosious]

It's a deal!

 

[Ambrosious]

Hey baby, are you wearing space panties? Cause your ass is out of this world.

 

[Lil-Brandi]

hmmmm

Hugs??? Did someone say hugs????

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

This one has actually worked for me, at a parking light once, with two women!

I would gladly become your devout slave - provide you with any bidding via your sweet desire. I would be tender when requested. I would be forceful when required. And I would serve only you, unless otherwise requested.

This….. only to be near to you.

I eat little and don't take up much space - you could keep my bound and in your coat closet when my duties are not required.

I would vacuum your carpets, do your dishes, clean your house, drive you - stark naked if you wish - and for nothing in return - except your masterful ownership over my devotion to you.

I would be - you total love slave.

 

[Ambrosious]

OK If you two girls start touching and hugging and such, I want to play!

 

[forgetunome]

Sparky...

Were the two women together when you used this line? or
Two different occasions?

Details man we want details!!

You are a sly fox...

 

[Lil-Brandi]

LOL

Sparky...yep. that one would work LOL...And Ambrosious, I am wearing space panties...how did you know...sheesh, were they showing again..LMAO!!!!!

 

[forgetunome]

Ambrosious...

OK If you two girls start touching and hugging and such, I want to play!

What do you want to play???

Lil-Brandi....should we humor the lad?

 

[Ambrosious]

Re: Ambrosious...

OK If you two girls start touching and hugging and such, I want to play!

What do you want to play???

Lil-Brandi....should we humor the lad?

Twister, of course. With cooking oil. And yes, humor me!

 

[Lil-Brandi]

LOL

A tarnished halo..and a removed halo...sure, lets get him!! LOL

 

[Ambrosious]

"Right foot on green." Your turn.

 

[forgetunome]

Left foot on blue...next?

 

[KillerMuffin]

The one that has always worked for me without fail is: "You oughta be in Playgirl. Oh my gawd you're just oh my gawd gorgeous!"

That and cleavage.

Men are at a disadvantage. They have this thingy that gets interested, steals the blood from their brains, and makes them incapable of rational thought. Thin what little blood they have left with alcohol and you guys are just screwed.

 

[Lil-Brandi]

....OMG!

(still trying to stand up, coated with cooking oil)

...and just how am I supposed to play this game now?

 

[Lil-Brandi]

LOL...

Killer Muffin...excuses, excuses! I must admit though, that was a very well stated excuse! (giggling)

 

[Ambrosious]

Re: ....OMG!

(still trying to stand up, coated with cooking oil)

...and just how am I supposed to play this game now?

Here, let me lick, I mean wipe, some of that off. Right hand on yellow. Your move.

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

Details.....

You vant details?

I was at a traffic light, oh about 2am or so. Waiting for the light to change - a long light. Right after I pulled up, actually going down the road prior - two young women, they look my way, I look theirs, no biggie right. So, the light you yellow - we stop next to each other. I know a couple of things - it's late, they've probably been drinking and therefore there's a chance they were "looking." I know the light is a long one too. So, I get bold, but what to say? I open my window and start with a simple Hi to get their attention and then I pretty much, with no rehearsal go into the slave thing. What really cracks'em up is the "vacuum naked, tie me up and keep me in the closet" thing.

So, I've got them smiling and the light goes green - we don't move, neither car and nobody's behind us either - it's very late right? No traffic. So I elaborate - same theme. They look at each other and wonder - hmmmmmm - is this guy nuts or what. I say, "c'mon I'm harmless, let's pull over and talk, I'll stay in my car, promise."

Well...... we talked.