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[Wings27]

Nothing but the absolute best for you dear. What time are we meeting at Sizzler again? I am starvin'

5, we have to get there for the early bird special you said.

 

[IhateClowns]

You know you'll just get a sucker

Well hell I have that in the closet now. Says Dirt devil on it...

 

[IhateClowns]

5, we have to get there for the early bird special you said.

Mmmmm mmmm sounds lovely. Hopefully they have out stools available.

 

[Morrigu]

Well hell I have that in the closet now. Says Dirt devil on it...

And a dirty little devil to be sure Just watch how much it tries to swallow

 

[IhateClowns]

And a dirty little devil to be sure Just watch how much it tries to swallow

I have a stopper on it. Plus being as little as I am I actually have to arch my back to get in there. I am Jack minus the Beanstalk I suppose.

 

[Wings27]

Mmmmm mmmm sounds lovely. Hopefully they have out stools available.

I'll call and reserve them in a few minutes.

 

[Morrigu]

I have a stopper on it. Plus being as little as I am I actually have to arch my back to get in there. I am Jack minus the Beanstalk I suppose.

A beanstalk would have greenfly, be forever spraying 'em.

 

[IhateClowns]

I'll call and reserve them in a few minutes.

Remember you don't have to look up their number. Just hit speed dial then number 1 on our home phone

 

[IhateClowns]

A beanstalk would have greenfly, be forever spraying 'em.

Hmmm interesting point. Maybe it is a good thing I don't have to disinfect every week. I have been told if I trim back the nest a bit, it makes the baby bird look a little bigger. Might try that.

 

[sexy_hottie_2003]

Hey homeys,

Name's Chenille. Looking for a gangasta man. Must like to stay up all night and must be a real bad ass boy. I like my men rough and mean who wear their hats backwards with their pants falling down to the ground. As for me I like to wear tiny tshirts that expose my body and tight dazzey duke shorts with high heels. I have dirty blond hair and a cherry tattoo on my upper leg. I'm lookin for a man who can support me. Must be able to give me my daily supply of Marbolo Cigarettes.

I'm currently staying with some girlfriends in a run down drug house. We only live here cause we snuck in after the cops raided the place. So you must be quiet about my whereabouts for if they found out we'll be evicted. Then I'm gonna have to cut your ass which I don't want to have to do.

You're to be at my beck and call every time I page you. Cause you gonna be my boo and I dont ever want you steppin out on me, understand. If you wanna meet me, just come down to the corner store. I'll be hanging out there with a couple of my girls. Bring some of your boys with ya if you wanna hook up with em. But they gotta be gangasta too.

Well gotta go now. My peeps are calling for me. See ya.

 

[IhateClowns]

Hey homeys,

Name's Chenille. Looking for a gangasta man. Must like to stay up all night and must be a real bad ass boy. I like my men rough and mean who wear their hats backwards with their pants falling down to the ground. As for me I like to wear tiny tshirts that expose my body and tight dazzey duke shorts with high heels. I have dirty blond hair and a cherry tattoo on my upper leg. I'm lookin for a man who can support me. Must be able to give me my daily supply of Marbolo Cigarettes.

I'm currently staying with some girlfriends in a run down drug house. We only live here cause we snuck in after the cops raided the place. So you must be quiet about my whereabouts for if they found out we'll be evicted. Then I'm gonna have to cut your ass which I don't want to have to do.

You're to be at my beck and call every time I page you. Cause you gonna be my boo and I dont ever want you steppin out on me, understand. If you wanna meet me, just come down to the corner store. I'll be hanging out there with a couple of my girls. Bring some of your boys with ya if you wanna hook up with em. But they gotta be gangasta too.

Well gotta go now. My peeps are calling for me. See ya.

Ha ha very good.

 

[IhateClowns]

I wanna know how much for a slice of that pussy pieeeee???? Call me

 

[Missy_xo]

Hey Y'all.

Well I was waitin' at the tattoo place, and no one showed up. So I guess I didn't give enough information about what I'm lookin' for.

My dream dude has long hair down to his ass, sunglasses that are broken and jeans with holes in them. He needs to look poor, but haves money. Oh, Oh!! And he has to be wearin' some sort of peace symbol on him. Wouldn't that be darlin'?

If you haven't guessed yet, then you must be perdy stupid. I'm attracted to em' hippy kinda fellas.

I don't like to wait, so you better catch me while I'm free. Yes, I'm still with Mean Joe. But he has a wife and kids, so I don' think he'll miss me much. I needa man who will lick in between my feet for me and not be afraid to touch inside of my nose.

Some people call me high maintenance, I just call it bein' me.

 

[fathom7]

SWM (or F) if ya want. Lookin' for love in all the right places -- mine, yours, the alley -- whateve.
Ya gotta bring your own car though 'cause I ain't allowed to drive in this state anymore. That plus -- well the wooden leg doesn't help.
I'll be the tall one hangin' by the backdoor of the bar I can no longer go into -- just respond to the ad and I'll tell ya where -- and if you can come armed -- that would be useful.
Your choice of attire for you -- though I do like leather and lace a lot. I'll be wearing the Prison Orange look that -- brings out my eyes. Just call and leave a message for me to tell me when -- as long as it's in the next 60 days -- I kinda got another "appointment" coming up. Pay no attention to the rudeness of the person answering -- they don't pay them folks enough here. Really lookin' forward to hearin' your voice and feelin' your heat. Butchie

 

[IhateClowns]

Yo bitches! You knows what I like! Fuckin' and suckin' So waz it gonna be huh? You gonna be my Ho'? You gonna suck my dick on command bitch??? I knows you will. Once you see this hog between my legs. You will be salivatin yo. So tell ya what. Hit me up on my I-phone bitch. Oh and don't forget my Schlitz and Kools

 

[IhateClowns]

Hello. I am a masturbator. A chronic masturbator. I have already masturbated twice today. I masturbate left and right handed. I am masturbating now as a matter of fact. I can't stop touching myself. I even post about masturbating. I love to masturbate. I am looking for a good Christian woman. Are you her?

 

[IhateClowns]

So yeah, I am looking for a woman to have my child please. I need the tax break . If you are interested meet me at the sperm bank.

 

[dunk_911]

this cracks me up!

Attention Females!

I am a junior scientist working for professor Jungheindrictzeithaffen in Stuttgart. Basically mollecular bio-mechanics are my life, I love to consider the possibilities of quark infusion with organic matter late into the night. I have a thing for the Large Hadron Collider and I love to discuss the Higgs Field and its bogus Bozon...

Anyway i think thats enough about how i spend my free time, in the days I work in a comic book store (voluntary ATM but hopefully my boss will be sorting something out soon). Currently, I am living with uncle Schmidt in the loft but he tends to leave me alone after the Wurst incident, so please do not worry about him.

My idea of a good time is staying up late watching a film based around a comic such as spiderman and then maybe have a bowl of cereal washed down with Dr Pepper. Then maybe finish up with a good in depth discussion about cutting edge theoretical particle physics.

About me, Id like to say I look a bit like Max Gottenfeller but with Kimm Kleiners jaw. Statistically I am 5'4" and I weigh 50 Kg. Blue eyes, and shoulder length strawberry blonde hair.

Please get back to me. I want you.

 

[IhateClowns]

Name is Marco. I am looking for a non fertile woman. I have 6 kids by 5 different women. I am looking for one who can't have kids. You see I don't believe in rubbers. Don't like em. They don't feel good and cut off the circulation. I am very careful and only fuck women who are classy. So I don't need to get tested.

I will be out of prison in May. I couldnt pay my child support so they threw me in here. I am getting out early for good behavior so you know I am a good guy. If you are looking for a guy that doesn't like rubbers and has never been tested then I am your guy.

Meet me at my momma's house when I get out in a month. If you wanna contact me now write a letter to The state pen.

 

[MsTexas]

Name is Marco. I am looking for a non fertile woman. I have 6 kids by 5 different women. I am looking for one who can't have kids. You see I don't believe in rubbers. Don't like em. They don't feel good and cut off the circulation. I am very careful and only fuck women who are classy. So I don't need to get tested.

I will be out of prison in May. I couldnt pay my child support so they threw me in here. I am getting out early for good behavior so you know I am a good guy. If you are looking for a guy that doesn't like rubbers and has never been tested then I am your guy.

Meet me at my momma's house when I get out in a month. If you wanna contact me now write a letter to The state pen.

LMAO

That's just rich ...

 

[IhateClowns]

LMAO

That's just rich ...

Yeah well, my parole officer says I can't go past the chicken shack without this here ankle bracelet sending volts of electricity through my body. Last time I stepped past my boundary it went off and I shit myself and passed out. Woke up to the dog trying to pull my pants down.

 

[IhateClowns]

Hola amigas me name es Paco. Wanna how do you say do the bump of the uglies? If so I will go to meat market and get you a chimichanga. Wanna? Bring you money. Meet you on bus at 2pm.

 

[IhateClowns]

I am looking for a woman who doesn't mind the toilet seat left up. Milk being drunk straight from the carton. Un-covered Sneezes. A guy who scratches his balls in the open from time to time. Laughs at his own jokes but rolls his eyes at yours.

A guy that doesn't grocery shop. A guy who turns his underwear inside out rather then washing them when all are not clean. A man that will put his friends above you at all times and wuill cancel plans with you at the last second to go watch the MMA fights with his buddies. A man that leaves his clothes all over the floor and shows more affection to his dog then he does to you.

A man that only drinks a 6pk or so a day and has held 6 different jobs in the last 3 years. A man that expects you to pay when we go out. A man that watches espn all day and doesn't give up the remote under any circumstance. That DVR's all of his shows and if your show is available after midnight then you can dvr yours.

If these are qualities that you are looking for in a guy then I think I might be your man. I need a good looking sexy back shaver in my life. I hope you are the one for me.....

 

[IhateClowns]

I need a nurse. Not just any nurse. A smoking hot sexy nurse that can make this damn cold go away when she walks in the door. If you think you fit the bill then come over to my house now. Nevermind the woman watching Glee downstairs. She won't notice you even if you say hello.

I will be waiting

 

[DayMaker]

I need a nurse. Not just any nurse. A smoking hot sexy nurse that can make this damn cold go away when she walks in the door. If you think you fit the bill then come over to my house now. Nevermind the woman watching Glee downstairs. She won't notice you even if you say hello.

I will be waiting

Sending over a few of my friends for interviews...

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