IhateClowns
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- Joined
- Feb 7, 2010
- Posts
- 25,386
Wow thank you for the quick reply. Who needs Craigslist when you have the Lit PG...Now where is that viagara
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Wow thank you for the quick reply. Who needs Craigslist when you have the Lit PG...Now where is that viagara
DayMaker
Undefined, but content.
- Joined
- Jul 8, 2010
- Posts
- 18,382
That's extra....and they charge by the minute...
IhateClowns
Censored
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2010
- Posts
- 25,386
Good thing I am like Lane Frost and am at my best just over 8 seconds....
RyanBlack
Shy and Innocent Good Boy
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2008
- Posts
- 13,628
hey I charge by the inch----might get a better deal from me
ya know considering the number of minutes involved. . . .
DayMaker
Undefined, but content.
- Joined
- Jul 8, 2010
- Posts
- 18,382
Including foreplay? Or is that the whole package?
*adjust her daytimer to minute settings*
hey I charge by the inch----might get a better deal from me
Are you headed over to take care of him? Just so I know if I should call off the women. However, if you are.....I might need to send a care package of a different sort....
IhateClowns
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- Feb 7, 2010
- Posts
- 25,386
Yeah like sutures and knees braces and a walking cane....
ucleebo
Aged like a fine old wine
- Joined
- Dec 31, 2007
- Posts
- 3,349
I am a very old, absolutely on my last legs. The doctor says I'll be lucky if I can just make it through the week.
I'm totally bald, have lost most of my teeth; I have bad breath, awful body odor, and a flatulance problem. Other than that, I'm really quite an attractive guy.
I would like to spend my last days with a beautiful woman, 23-34 years old, with an athletic body and very large breasts. She should be willing to do anything to satisfy me sexually, as I haven't that much time left for extensive foreplay.
Interested ladies will be interviewed totally at my convenience. Please line up outside my hospital door in an orderly fashion until I awake and can get to you one at a time.
I'm totally bald, have lost most of my teeth; I have bad breath, awful body odor, and a flatulance problem. Other than that, I'm really quite an attractive guy.
I would like to spend my last days with a beautiful woman, 23-34 years old, with an athletic body and very large breasts. She should be willing to do anything to satisfy me sexually, as I haven't that much time left for extensive foreplay.
Interested ladies will be interviewed totally at my convenience. Please line up outside my hospital door in an orderly fashion until I awake and can get to you one at a time.
IloveClowns
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Jan 31, 2011
- Posts
- 260
Hi guys. I am relatively new here. I am here because I am looking for a lover. Not just any lover mind you. I am looking for a man that likes to sit alone in his apt or parents house and post on message boards all day. There is something sexy about the thumping of keyboards that really gets me wet.
You must be out of shape, or at least slight out of shape, addicted to mountain dew, allergic to the sun light. Send random cock pics through PM to unsuspecting ladies (well you hope they are ladies) in hopes of them going that is the most beautiful unkept cock I have ever seen want to watch m masturbate for you on cam.
You must be able to quote Family Guy and Judge Judy verbatim. You must wear whitey tighties only. Preferrably ones with stains on them. Stains make me hot and well boxer briefs and boxers are just too cliche' for a woman of my ilk.
Please realize that the av is really me. I am very sexual but still a virgin, so I am looking for a man that will help take my cherry. Please do not be shaven or clipped down. I like a full man bush to hack on. I have an unlimited supply of toothpicks so I have no problem with pubes.
I do have some flaws and I hope you don't judge too harshly. My right boob is slightly larger then my left boob. I also have a small freckle on my lower back that just drives me crazy. I wish I could get rid of freckles but the nail file just makes my skin bleed.
Anyway if you think you fit this description and are willing to take a chance on me please send me a PM.
You must be out of shape, or at least slight out of shape, addicted to mountain dew, allergic to the sun light. Send random cock pics through PM to unsuspecting ladies (well you hope they are ladies) in hopes of them going that is the most beautiful unkept cock I have ever seen want to watch m masturbate for you on cam.
You must be able to quote Family Guy and Judge Judy verbatim. You must wear whitey tighties only. Preferrably ones with stains on them. Stains make me hot and well boxer briefs and boxers are just too cliche' for a woman of my ilk.
Please realize that the av is really me. I am very sexual but still a virgin, so I am looking for a man that will help take my cherry. Please do not be shaven or clipped down. I like a full man bush to hack on. I have an unlimited supply of toothpicks so I have no problem with pubes.
I do have some flaws and I hope you don't judge too harshly. My right boob is slightly larger then my left boob. I also have a small freckle on my lower back that just drives me crazy. I wish I could get rid of freckles but the nail file just makes my skin bleed.
Anyway if you think you fit this description and are willing to take a chance on me please send me a PM.
Krystal_Diva
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- May 19, 2011
- Posts
- 646
Hi.
My name is Krystal_diva. No, I'm not really a Diva, neither am I made of Krystal but seems I may have been lacking in the imagination department when I signed up and now I'm stuck with it.
I Need love and attention. I was caught up in a very bitter custody battle when my parents divorced when I was a child - neither of them wanted me. I often voice my opinions and then think I can't be right all the time only to be proved wrong time and time again.
I enjoy mud wrestling and beach Tennis (always very quick games), and have a yearning for a sweet man with a small penis as I am far too tight down there for a real man.
I have often been described as a bitter, unsuccessful middle aged loser wallowing in an unending sea of inert but that is just 42 people's opinion. I am not perfect but expect you to be rich and stupid.
Looks are not everything, but mingers need not apply. I await your responses.
Yours for the right amount of cash.
Krystal Diva
My name is Krystal_diva. No, I'm not really a Diva, neither am I made of Krystal but seems I may have been lacking in the imagination department when I signed up and now I'm stuck with it.
I Need love and attention. I was caught up in a very bitter custody battle when my parents divorced when I was a child - neither of them wanted me. I often voice my opinions and then think I can't be right all the time only to be proved wrong time and time again.
I enjoy mud wrestling and beach Tennis (always very quick games), and have a yearning for a sweet man with a small penis as I am far too tight down there for a real man.
I have often been described as a bitter, unsuccessful middle aged loser wallowing in an unending sea of inert but that is just 42 people's opinion. I am not perfect but expect you to be rich and stupid.
Looks are not everything, but mingers need not apply. I await your responses.
Yours for the right amount of cash.
Krystal Diva
B
buctny8
Guest
I am looking for an independent minded woman who doesn't mind picking up the tab as I have no money. I prefer her to be double jointed, have a super model build, be attracted to guys with a bit of a gut and able to orgasm quickly, very quickly I am afraid. If she owns a winery, I will be hers forever, as long as she gives me an appropriate allowance!
IhateClowns
Censored
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2010
- Posts
- 25,386
Howdy. My name is Sabrina and I am Bi. Meaning I pretend to be a girl online but that is me in my AV so I am actually a guy. What I am looking for is a well hung guy that will believe that the pics I send him or really me. Are you out there man of my cyber dreams?
I have collectedd many amatuer pictures to share with someone. I love the fantasy of pretending to be a girl so i can watch guys jerk off for me. There is something hot about them thinking I have a vagina and it is just for them.
Are you out there lovely man. If so send me an email to:
sabrinachickwithadick@gmail.com
I have collectedd many amatuer pictures to share with someone. I love the fantasy of pretending to be a girl so i can watch guys jerk off for me. There is something hot about them thinking I have a vagina and it is just for them.
Are you out there lovely man. If so send me an email to:
sabrinachickwithadick@gmail.com
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