Pardon Our Exploding Sidewalks

But is there a drop of snow and ice on those sidewalks? Maybe just the tiniest bit less of the powder in the red cans next year? I say, well-done, shereads!
 
What exactly is burning?

50-year-old underground electrical cables. Or something. When not one, but three manhole covers go flying through the air and the sidewalk bursts into flames, the one thing everyone can agree on is the value of nearby public restrooms.

Who wants to invest in my new tourist enterprise, "Clean Underwear and Fireproof Shoes"?
 
Hmm.

It just occurs to me that the Exploding Sidewalks incident coincides with the conversion of the downtown trolley to run on fuel made from restaurant grease.
 
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