Pain

[WriterDom]

A lot of people on the outside really don't get that there is good pain. They don't understand that after a scene both the PYL and pyl feel euphoric.

When did you discover you enjoyed either giving or receiving pain?

 

[BlushingFlames]

Honestly I never thought I would like the pain before I met my current dom, but lately I've been finding certain S/m aspects that are turning me on that I never thought of before hand.

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[bunny bondage]

i'm not sure exactly, but when i was very young i was thinking about spanking in an erotic way. i think i've always felt differently about pain than "outside" folks.

 

[SkyBluAngelEyes]

Yes, WD, euphoric it is and if you do not live the lifestyle, one can never really know how it really feels. Even trying to explain it is inadequate. There are a plethora of facets that surround BDSM, and one of the facets includes pain.

I think I first enjoyed pain before I even knew there were words to label what I was feeling. Probably a young girl of maybe only eight when I'd get in trouble and get a good butt whoopin'.

In high school, when making out with a certain boyfriend, he would reach up and pinch my nipple, and my initial reaction was shock, but then settling down, I would whisper to him to pinch my nipple harder, he would. I’d then whisper to him to again pinch it harder and twist it. Ooooooooh, that sent signals to the rest of my body and it would respond in a likewise fashion.

I think he was the one that freaked a bit.

 

[RJMasters]

Recieving pain - For me, I enjoy the cleansing aspects of pain. I have a bit of Masochist in me, which builds up over time. Almost a bi-annual type of thing, some times more. The thought of me with a bared back, a pissed off Domme with cane in hand...and me calling her a name as the last intellgent words that come out of my mouth for the next 1/2 hour....pretty much sums up a good cleansing, with tearful apologies afterwards. This hasn't happened yet, but I am a hopeful Masochist

Giving Pain - is about trust and endurance and also a testing. Oten used as a means to break through to the inner person. Enjoy the release they experience when it is over.

 

[shamble]

I've always had a high threshold for pain, which is good because I have quite a bit of arthritis even though I'm only 29. Long hours of manual labor, as well as some injuries have lead me to this. I don't like taking medications, so I just live with the pain. It's not a huge amount of pain, just some burning in my right hand and a dull ache in my shoulder and legs.

Sometimes, the pain can be a great source of focus; especially when I need to stay awake for any reason.

Anywho, before I get too offtrack, I've noticed a direct correlation between pain and pleasure. Like spanking a woman hard enough to leave a welt, then kissing it or blowing lightly on it. She feels the pleasurable sensation more intensely.

 

[BlueSugar]

When I was younger my parents had the playboy chanel.
Curious and young and searching my body, I saw one of the ladies drip wax on herself...

so i tried it... and it just plain burned, and then it felt cool and tingly.

Then a few years later my boyfriend and I were roll playing, and he slapped my ass and I had a Secretary moment where all stopped and I just looked back at him ...

and slowly smiled.


From then on it has been "the only difference between pain and pleasure is perception"

 

[shy slave]

My first husband very occasionally hit me. We were both young and with a baby under huge amounts of pressure from both families to 'perform' family life correctly. As a result we would often end up arguing.

I know no-one deserves to be in DV situations and it was not pleasant but he was under considerable strees for a young man.

Anyway I can't say that I particularly noticed the pain and always thought he never hit that hard.

I spent many years working with people with challenging behaviour and over the years have been punched, kicked, bitten etc but again it was not the pain that gave me most cause for alarm but the paperwork that followed!!

I always thought I had a low pain threshold but having met Master I am not as sure about that as I was.

I was not keen on the pain aspects (particularly hair pulling) but He would not accept that. Prior to our first meeting He was clear about His expectations, and prior to our first session He again gave me the opportunity to change my mind.

I now crave His teeth on my nipples, clamps on my cunt and a crop across my back. I have discovered my back can take more pain than my ass.

Mid-orgasm to have the crop land on my breasts is beyond compare to anything experienced before, especially if I beg at the right moment and He allows me that pleasure.

The cane is the only pain I HATE and endure purely for His gratification. The word alone can reduce me to tears.

The emotional high that pain gives me surprises me every time it occurs.
Not sure it gives me an endorphin rush that makes me re-engerised but the pain does satisfy and inner need that I have yet to find words for.

 

[english vicky]

Hmm...tricky one!

I remember asking a friend when I was little why I like pain...they said (i have no idea how they knew i think i was about 8) it was called masochism.

i went home from school that day and told mum i was a masochist!!!! lol...i remember her response even now, i'm 23. i remember the shocked expression and the response along the lines of 'what! where did you hear that from don't say that again'!!

Kids huh?!

i didn't find it arousing, i don't think. i thought it was...well..****. i quite liked the feel of it, to feel different. to have a part of me that felt different to the rest.

i also used to play at school with mittens that had a catch to keep them together when stored. i loved to wear them and pretend i was arrested and the gloves were like handcuffs when linked together.

As i type this and think about it, i feel quite weird...almost ashamed. Not for what i feel now, but then, at that young age. i guess that when i have children i wouldn't like to think of them experiencing feelings like that. Although i turned out ok!

i often look at my younger nephew, 11, and wonder...he's acting kinda like i did - but he's so young who knows, could be nothing.

 

[Hajar]

When did you discover you enjoyed either giving or receiving pain?

about 5 years ago my then bf now Sir/husband slapped my ass while having sex, last year I finally got the nerve to ask for him to do it harder and now

As for the giving I found that I much perfer the fear that comes before, if I'm going to be the giver

 

[graceanne]

Well I realized as a child that I liked it and found it arousing. It wasn't until this year that I realized that their are lots of people that are like me. I used to think I was a freak.
I actually remember my husband asking me, back when we were first married, what I'd think about when I masturbated, and me refusing to talk about it. I mean, arms crossed over the chest, lips together, not going to talk about it. Now we talk about it and . . . do it.

 

[Heliocentric]

I'm not sure when I realized I was into good pain. I was young, but I've had fantasys about bondage and torture for as long as I can remember.

I know the moment I blured the line between good and bad pain (and liked it). I used to experiment on my own a lot when I was a kid (an aside: I can't belive some of the things I used to get away with. Sheesh!) and I decided to put one of those little black clips (like binder clips but smaller) on my nipple. It hurt. I took it off. I thought to myself "this is really stupid" and then I realised I was hard as a rock.

 

[Bikewer]

It's surprising that so many can't see the relationship between pain and pleasure. It's quite common in athletics, where everyone is familiar with the "runner's high" phenomenon.

Athletes also speak often of "breaking the pain barrier", a condition that most think of as producing a certain euphoria.

Endorphin dumps, adrenaline, all those clever little chemicals that are produced by stimulaton....All contribute.

 

[graceanne]

I know that certain pain is a good way to release stress for me. By certain pain, I mean that pain in my stomach doesn't count, but at times if I dig my nails into my hand or arm that it makes me feel better. *shrugs* or maybe I'm just royally screwed up

 

[ammre]

I found a porn when i was younger about a woman who was getting clothes pins on her body. I was curious why she wanted that so i was going to try and emulate that, but i coudln't find clothes pins. I did ont he other hand find butterfly clips. (http://bingsalesinc.com/BFB6.jpg ) Anyone who remembers can tell you that the claw part on thw clip is very long and jagged for the clip's teeny size. You wanted it to dig into the hair properly now didn't you...
So i stuck a bunch all over ym boobs and labia and stuff... Than i put one on each nipple and finally one on my clit. The last three hurt, but nothing hurt half so bad as takign those suckers off and watching the purpled dents attempting to come back to life. Dear god what pain... so i did it a few more time following to try and relax and not hate the pain so much.
While pan can be pleasure, for me it's also a bit of a mental rush... Let's see what my mind can stand up to today... How many times can they hit me in the same spot with the paddle... how many hooks can i take...

 

[Netzach]

I never really eroticized recieving it till I bottomed to my trainers and found that I liked a lot of the physical aspects of SM. I think the really enlightening experience was my first time as a needleplay bottom. Now there's something I never in a million billion gazillion years I thought I might *enjoy.* I'm glad I got over my doubt and tried it, and it's caused me to try a lot more things I never thought I would have just to see.

Definitely an enjoyment of the chemical reaction, endorphins being produced, a sense of passage and trial and endurance. Rowr!

As a giver, it's harder to define. There's an associated adrenaline high as a Domme that I think I crave. I definitely enjoy the artistry and creativity that is involved in giving someone a "good pain" experience with just enough "bad pain" to keep it interesting -- it takes finesse and intuition, and it's a lot like playing an instrument, I imagine.

 

[shy slave]

Have not tried needle play but Master has a neurological wheel that has sharp pin-prick teeth.

Having that roll down by back is both weird and wonderful

 

[exquisite_pet]

It was only in the past year.....after meeting my Master that i realized i was into "good pain". He is very experienced with floggers and there is nothing like slipping into that endorphin release during our play times.

Though i wonder if anyone else has had the experience of it taking more and more pain to get to that place. i've been with my Master for over a year now. And it seems like it takes harder and harder play.

 

[Quint]

I very very rarely "like" pain. It keeps me from coming rather than facilitating/enhancing it, I don't slip into subspace and I don't feel cleansed on any but a few rare occasions. But I sure do get excited by the thought of it, and that has been true for as far back as my early childhood. I made up SM stories for my cousins over Christmas break in elementary school; I made fake whips out of scraps of leather; I got immensely squirmy when watching movies where females were beaten or abused or objectified. Go figure.