Orgasms! What the hell am i doing wrong?

[disel81]

I know lots of woman have these questions. But here is another one. First of all, i know i do not have a g-spot - well one that works or is useful to me anyways. I know this because i have searched for it (and you can only search so long!) And even during sex, of all the positions my boyfriend and i have tried, i have never felt a single ounce of orgasmic feeling. But this is something i have come to accept. The problem i am mostly concerned about is that during foreplay or when my boyfriend is manually stimulating me...i can hardly get myself to orgasm. He is not doing anything wrong because sometimes after sex i cannot even get to orgasm doing it myself. So what am i doing wrong? Am i concentrating on it too much and not enjoying myself enough? What? I am so frustrated with myself about not being able to get off! What is my problem?

And for you doctors out there... i am a diabetic..does this have anything to do with it? Because i know that diabetes messes with your body. Just wondering if that could be a cause. Please help..ANYONE!

Frustrated Woman

 

[curvacious]

don't worry about looking for your g-spot. Maybe try your clit. There are plenty of errogenous spots on the body. Just relax and don't expect to have an orgasm every time. Just do what feels good and soon enough you'll know what to do to have an orgasm.

 

[Angelique]

Might want to talk with your doctor about that. I'm no medical expert, but I do know that diabetes can cause impotence in men...perhaps it can affect the women genital area, too.

If it's not physical, it certainly could be mental...maybe you're putting too much pressure on yourself to orgasm. If that's the case, relaxing and not trying so hard should help. Maybe a glass of wine, a long, slow, sensuous evening with no time frame, where both of you are well-rested might help.

Whatever you do, I wish you luck!

 

[Celestiale]

I don't think that your problem is all that uncommon. I have *sort of* found my g-spot I think (?? lol), but it's not something that I focus on during sex. I do find that I have a hard time reaching orgasm sometimes when I am:

(a) overstimulated down there

or

(b) thinking about it too much!

Also, if I'm with my guy but I've got other things on my mind, it's much harder to let myself go...I think I think too much! If something is bothering me deep down, it's not gonna happen for me.

I'm also a diabetic, type 1 for 4 1/2 years now (on an insulin pump), but I had these quirks with me since before that, so try not to worry!

One more thing...do you ever use toys? A vibrator can do wonders...it's practically a sure-fire way to ensure the big O!

 

[disel81]

reply!

Thanks to all of you who are trying to help me out! In response to the last reply, yes i have a vibrator and i can not get off from that when it is inserted in me..i have tried to find my g-spot with that as well but as usual, no luck.
But i do think that i am concentrating to much on orgasming. However, as you said before, when you have something troubing you deep down inside and it is on your mind constantly, it will not likely happen. But that is what is troubling me everytime my boyfriend and i have sex. I guess i just need to relax more..and think of things during sex that will arouse me! Is that what will do it? Or is there something more?

 

[Pyper]

G-spot my ass! All being stimulated in the G-spot does for me is make me feel like I have to pee.

Disel, don't feel bad about not being able to have an orgasm from vaginal penetration. It's unbelievable, but up to 80% of women who consistently have orgasms with their partners achieve them through manual or oral stimulation.

If you're satisfying yourself, a vibrator to the clit is the only way to go. In fact, this is the only type of masturbation that has ever gotten me off. If you really are determined to have an orgasm with your bf during penetration and penetration only, I would have to suggest toys, such as a vibrating cock ring.

 

[Celestiale]

I completely agree with Pyper! I think I've only gotten off once using a vibrator IN me, I really meant that you should use it on the outside. That whole G-Spot thing...ugh! Try not to worry that you can't find it hon.

I also have to say that my husband recently bought a jelly-cock ring and it is AWESOME! I LOVE IT, it's definitely worth it. I was concerned for him cause he's on the large side, but because the whole thing is made of stretchy, flexible jelly, he has no problem's wearing it. See if you can't get you S.O. to try one on!