Orgasms, the submissive perspective

[WriterDom]

But Dom/mes can relate experiences as well.

I was chatting with someone and I said something like "most women or perhaps a lot, and I'm talking mainly submissives can cum in 30 seconds" and I think she spewed her Mt. Dew. Now I know not all can cum fast all the time, but I've know a few that can be working on #3 in a minute. Some that could keep going for an hour in and out of orgasm and mostly in.

So my question in general terms is do you think submissives are quicker on the trigger? And most of the ones I knew seemed to be born that way and not as a result of training. Any thoughts?

 

[slaveSeeker]

So my question in general terms is do you think submissives are quicker on the trigger? And most of the ones I knew seemed to be born that way and not as a result of training. Any thoughts?

Well, for me, it's easy to keep going in and out after the first one.

Quicker on the trigger? I'm not sure...but it is my belief that it is "learned not trained". Interesting thought - could this be what aids in being a pyl??? Like a predetermined roll.

 

[FurryFury]

If this is a benchmark of being submissive, I must not be submissive because it takes me longer.

Fury

 

[slaveSeeker]

If this is a benchmark of being submissive, I must not be submissive because it takes me longer.

Fury

From reading a little bit of everything on this Forum (and IMO) there isn't a benchmark for anything. lol

 

[caela]

It might take you long FF but at least you get there. A friend of mine from my local munch group simply has what she calls "a broken clit". She can enjoy sex in all it's myriad forms but she simply cannot attain orgasm at all, not even little ones.

Makes me very grateful that - on rare occassions - I can pull off WriterDom's 30 seconds lol.

WriterDom, I don't think it's necessarily submissives that are quicker on trigger but just one of those things that can vary wildly from woman to woman.

 

[lne_iii]

There are WAYYY too many factors, imho, to pin such a distinction on subs or doms or any one "label"...you know?

That having been said, I've experienced this from almost every angle...it is possible to achieve orgasm very quickly, but it varies greatly from person to person, and the scene...etc.

LNE

 

[WyoD_S]

I can get My girl to cum in two seconds or so, anytime and anywhere. Just by grabbing her hair and growling her 'trigger word' in her ear.

Love it

 

[jadefirefly]

If that was the sort of thing that made one submissive, I should be turning in my collar and applying to take lessons from Netzach. It takes me considerably longer than 30 seconds, no matter what state of arousal I'm at. I'm just used to it by now.

 

[the captians wench]

I can get My girl to cum in two seconds or so, anytime and anywhere. Just by grabbing her hair and growling her 'trigger word' in her ear.

Love it

*purr* that's so me.

I'm very orgasmic, it doesn't take much at all to get me, about 99% of the time. I don't think that it's a sub thing, because I have a very close friend who's also a sub, and she has a very hard time in the orgasm field.

 

[His_pita]

Quicker on the trigger? I'm not sure...but it is my belief that it is "learned not trained". Interesting thought - could this be what aids in being a pyl??? Like a predetermined roll.

I do happen to believe that in many woman it is "learned" I used to be an orgasm once or twice girl and it would take a lot of build-up for me. Then I trained myself to become multi-orgasmic. Now with my Dom, he can get me there within a minute or two and I do ride them in and out for as long as he allows me to.

 

[BiBunny]

I'm not sure if it has anything to do with being submissive or not. I'm one of those lucky people who can cum within 30 seconds or less. Hell, all He has to do is look at me and growl, "Cum!" in that voice of His, and I do it immediately. It's damn inconvenient sometimes, actually.

That being said, He also says I have orgasms on a scale of 1 to 5. I can have a "1" in a few seconds just from hearing His voice. It takes much longer to build up to a "5," though. For me, I think that although those little orgasms are fun and easy to get, if I don't get anything more than that, boredom kicks in. I have learned that pain can take me much farther on my little "orgasm scale" than just plain old vanilla foreplay or sex. I have to get past my little ones to get to my big ones. Maybe there are other submissives in the same boat.

I sincerely doubt that I'm making any sense right now. I'm tired, and studying for finals fries my brain. I'll come back tomorrow to make sure I haven't confused everyone.

 

[lne_iii]

I'm not sure if it has anything to do with being submissive or not. I'm one of those lucky people who can cum within 30 seconds or less. Hell, all He has to do is look at me and growl, "Cum!" in that voice of His, and I do it immediately. It's damn inconvenient sometimes, actually.

That being said, He also says I have orgasms on a scale of 1 to 5. I can have a "1" in a few seconds just from hearing His voice. It takes much longer to build up to a "5," though. For me, I think that although those little orgasms are fun and easy to get, if I don't get anything more than that, boredom kicks in. I have learned that pain can take me much farther on my little "orgasm scale" than just plain old vanilla foreplay or sex. I have to get past my little ones to get to my big ones. Maybe there are other submissives in the same boat.

I sincerely doubt that I'm making any sense right now. I'm tired, and studying for finals fries my brain. I'll come back tomorrow to make sure I haven't confused everyone.

Actually that makes perfect sense if you ask me, and I sincerely doubt that you are the only one who has such a "scale"

 

[chris9]

Maybe it's because women who know themselves sexually, are more relaxed about it, have accepted themselves tend to have orgasms faster. It's just a hypothesis, I'm thinking of all those guys mainly on the 'how to' forum who ask how to make their women open up. If women are raised in a 'traditional' way (sex is dirty, don't play with yourself, it's just to make children) no wonder they have a hard time orgasming (is that a word?). But if they accept their sexuality, maybe it's easier then.

Doesn't explain why there are women who still have a hard time orgasming after accepting themselves.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Does sort of remind me of When Harry Met Sally. 30 seconds? Rarely that quick here, but once started, unless I am very ill in the extremes, he can keep it going to double figures without problem. Don't think it has anything to do with submissives though, just a person's make up. Certainly didn't change when I decided to be submissive anyway.

Catalina

 

[WriterDom]

Part of it could be acceptance. I've noticed those that can cum quick get a lot of practice. Be it by their on hand or another. A lot of women have had either really bad experiences or picked up unhealthy views of sexuality in childhood and don't bloom until they are in their 30s.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Part of it could be acceptance. I've noticed those that can cum quick get a lot of practice. Be it by their on hand or another. A lot of women have had either really bad experiences or picked up unhealthy views of sexuality in childhood and don't bloom until they are in their 30s.

Hmm, nope, doesn't answer why I take more than 30 seconds as I have been very sexually active since mid teens, highly experimental with regular oral and anal by 18, and plenty of orgasms along the way. LOL, I do remember once getting scolded by the gyno because I was doubled in pain from spending a whole day just cumming. So how do you know a woman has cum guys?

Catalina

 

[WriterDom]

I said Part. Everyone is wired differently. My cock rarely goes down at all after the first orgasm and will a little stimulation I can keep going and going. Some guys get a standing ovation if they come back for seconds.

 

[Quint]

Orgasm? Rarely happens. Not my focal point. I've been getting myself off since I was 11ish, and am very comfortable with myself sexually. The 30-seconds are once in a blue moon and only by my own hand. Usually it takes upwards of 15 minutes...the only exception being anal sex + vibrator, which does it a lot quicker for me. And fuggettabout multiples or orgasm on command. Sometimes I think I got into pain because pleasure was kind of a bum rap for me.

 

[wolf2002]

In my experience it has a lot to do with the sexual charge of the situation.... mental foreplay is far more effective than physical stimulation... perhaps submissive girls can come easier (not sure if this is true) cause they are more responsive to the sexual charge of a situation... for some, the mere presence of her (or a random) Dom is enough to trigger her...

 

[WriterDom]

In my experience it has a lot to do with the sexual charge of the situation.... mental foreplay is far more effective than physical stimulation... perhaps submissive girls can come easier (not sure if this is true) cause they are more responsive to the sexual charge of a situation... for some, the mere presence of her (or a random) Dom is enough to trigger her...

That's another point I tried to make to her. That not only is it foreplay, but extreme foreplay.

But still, there are those who can go from 0 to 60 from voice alone. Or from no sexual thoughts, to ripping off her shorts and eating her pussy.

 

[wolf2002]

But still, there are those who can go from 0 to 60 from voice alone. Or from no sexual thoughts, to ripping off her shorts and eating her pussy.

Yes. I mentioned on a thread once a befriended lady who claimed she could squirt on command. She had a LDR and when her Dom finally, after months, would come over, one whisper in her ear was enough to make her wet the couch...

I am not sure if its true but some people agreed such a 'cold start' is possible...

 

[NemoAlia]

Sometimes I think I got into pain because pleasure was kind of a bum rap for me.

Twins, I say. I totally feel ya.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

But Dom/mes can relate experiences as well.

I was chatting with someone and I said something like "most women or perhaps a lot, and I'm talking mainly submissives can cum in 30 seconds" and I think she spewed her Mt. Dew. Now I know not all can cum fast all the time, but I've know a few that can be working on #3 in a minute. Some that could keep going for an hour in and out of orgasm and mostly in.

So my question in general terms is do you think submissives are quicker on the trigger? And most of the ones I knew seemed to be born that way and not as a result of training. Any thoughts?

Hmm that's funny. I average about 5 in under 2 minutes...

but I am always in the Top position and I always control the entire episode from beginning to end. On the rare occassion (after my initial go-round) that I allow someone else to lead I average about 10-15 in about a half an hour to 45 minutes.

I never thought it would be considered strange, hell I have averaged 10-15 with a completely submissive female who is not allowed to touch ME at all.

 

[rosco rathbone]

In my personal experience, it has been the exact opposite.

 

[serijules]

Orgasm? Rarely happens. Not my focal point. I've been getting myself off since I was 11ish, and am very comfortable with myself sexually. The 30-seconds are once in a blue moon and only by my own hand. Usually it takes upwards of 15 minutes...the only exception being anal sex + vibrator, which does it a lot quicker for me. And fuggettabout multiples or orgasm on command. Sometimes I think I got into pain because pleasure was kind of a bum rap for me.

I'm like this too.

By my own hand, I can come very easily and rather quickly (I never bothered to time it and think the idea of timing it is...pointless.) I hate multiple orgasms; I find it stressful and unenjoyable. It's more of a punishment to me than anything. I'm MUCH happier being kept on the edge for ages and ages and either being denied orgasm or allowed one at my own hand. I'm not too thrilled about cumming at another person's touch. I can do it, and I enjoy it, but it's rarely as orgasmic as my own touch will bring. Sometimes this bothers me because I feel so pressured to cum when my Owner is touching me and ordering me to do so, that I actually CAN'T. I'm just very particular about what makes me orgasm. It often takes quite a long time when she is stimulating me and I feel bad and try to hurry up and finish so she doesn't have to spend so much time getting me there. Blah...it's just tough for me sometimes.

I enjoy the ride more than the destination sometimes. Being teased and tortured and kept on edge for hours is much more satisfying to me than all these little cum-shot moments a lot of people seem to like. I don't even care most of the time if I am allowed to orgasm or not...if I'm made to suffer and not allowed to cum...to me that's just like a prolonged orgasm. That few-second burst of pleasure at the end is just NOT the focus for me.

Has nothing to do with how I grew up, anything I had happen to me, or any such other psychological BS. Just how my body ticks.