Orgasm During Sex

[Chicklet]

Hey there (girls specifically)

I personally have no problem orgasming every time I have sex. One way or another, I get my pleasure to a peak. But my mom, for instance, only has an orgasm once out of every ten times or so.

I was thinking of writing a how-to essay about helping yourself get off during sex, and before I post it with only my intake, I was hoping I could get some more opinions.

What're some tricks you do? What're some ways that you've kept yourself from losing the pleasure? What're some of your experiences?

Chicklet

 

[Limbhugger]

Damn your first response and it's from a guy...lol. Sorry...

My wife almost exclusively has to have some form of manual stimulation to achieve orgasm. Be it fingers, oral, toys, etc. she is not giving to vaginal orgasm.

So, the first thing for her/us is, she takes control of her orgasm. Not meaning that I don't get her off or anything like that. Just meaning that she is aware that she needs direct stimulation and doesn't feel bad about it or anything. In fact she directs and talks me through it. Well, not so much any more as I pretty much have it down after 15 years...lol. Does that make sense? I guess just mention this part because I have read and heard from so many women that don't feel that way. Like the idea of masturbating during intercourse is somehow wrong and that they should be able to get on and ride to exctasy or something.

Anyway, I think a willing, patient, considerate lover is also important in consistant orgasm experiences. For me, her pleasure is the best part of sex. She has to coax me into having an orgasm without her having one. Sometimes she just likes to go for it and not worry so much about cumming but just doing it. In those instances she knows I won't cum unless she says that is what she wants. But then again, that usually concludes with her lying back and masturbating herself to orgasm right after I am spent. I usually (if I'm not snoring...kidding) help her here by sucking her nipples, rubbing her body, etc.

She is not really a toy fan in the classic sense in that she isn't real big on dildos and insertion toys. But I pity the person who ever tried to rid her of her clit stimulators! She has one of those small blunt ones and I'm surprised she hasn't had it guilded in gold...lol. She has another bullet-shaped one with a cord to a remote that she doesn't enjoy as much. So I get to play with that one on her during sex. I use it to heighten her awareness of various places on her body during sex.

Anyway, that's my .67 cents worth.

 

[Guest]

I have to have manual stimulation. I can get there once... my biggest problem is getting there again .

 

[English Lady]

Relax. Thats the main tip I can give, relax and let go. Don't be afraid to enjoy sex, to show your sexual nature to your partner.
I know when i first started having sex I needed manual stimulation to orgasm at all and still I need manual stimulation to have a really intense orgasm. I only usually have one of them per session though.


But i found the more relaxed i got with my partner the more I enjoyed penetration and the more i let myself enjoy penetration BINGO! I started to experience internal orgasms.

Try flexing those PC muscles...squeeze him tight and release do it a few times over, he'll enjoy it, you'll enjoy it and for me it triggers an orgasm!


Actually i find i have far fewer of those clenching internal orgasms when I am on top...I find that for me they happen most when he's on top or from rear entry positions.


Also I think that if you need manual stimulation to come, you should be able to use your fingers during sex...let your partner know he's not doing anything wrong but you just need a little push to get you over the edge..I am sure most men want their woman to orgasm when they have sex no matter what they have to do to make you come!

ANyway...hope some of that was helpful Chicklet!

 

[Astro]

Also from a man, so sorry.

This is in support of English Lady's post. My current girlfriend could only reach orgasm from manual stimulation. However as she relaxed with me she has enjoyed pentrative sex alot more, she now changes position during sex so that it can give her the greatest plesure.

Maybe a tip would be to change position to increase either stimulation of the clit or G-spot during sex?

 

[lovechild27]

I dont like a lot of clitoral stimualtion. (which I have been told is odd) I rather have penetration. Thats really the only way I can come...penetration. Once in a great while Ill get off from oral. There are a lot of books out there on the female orgasm...maybe check some out.

 

[randy1]

Another guy response, but my first lover told me upfront she didn't orgasm to take the pressure off. The reality was she did, but didn't know it (having read about fireworks et. al.). After she learned that it can be a more mild 'floating' feeling, I was annoyed, 'cause then it became the goal and end rather than keeping on playing.

A more recent lover (virgin) had never orgasmed, it just takes time. It's a mental thing. Physical relaxation is required. Mental/emotional comfort, security and support is necessary. Practice, practice, practice.

(She didn't practice, but that didn't mean the results didn't occur, it just took a LONG time.)

hth,

randy

PS: Remember guys and gals, female orgasm isn't a physical thing, it's a mental thing. Women have to 'allow' themselves to experience orgasm--the onset of orgasm can cause enough stress to block orgasm!

 

[Succulent-one]

Just let go

First just let go and don't worry about it, let it happen.

Second practice makes perfect. LOL Know your body and the little signs it tell you that lead up to the orgasm.

Third Have your partner, or you, stimulate you before vaginal intercourse. If you are primed for the main event or preferably, for me, already have climaxed once, the vaginal orgasm will happen.

Fourth It is more difficult for me to orgasm while on top straddling the man. I think it is a mental thing. I am too distracted I think watching what he doing to my breasts and watching his reactions. LOL

Fifth, Do Kegal excercises. They will help you control the amount of presssure you put on the penis during regular vaginal sex. It will help you reach orgasm faster.

Relax and have fun!

 

[ozraven]

I have heard this before from women, and from a personal experience view, it is mostly a matter of getting it right...positional, duration etc wise...........

I have been with 3 women who claimed they could not cum this way, all of whom did......experiment more?

 

[Limbhugger]

I agree completely with Succulent-One. Once the mrs. has her first orgasm, the rest just flow naturally. She has no problem being multi-orgasmic, it's just the first one that needs special attention. More often than not she'll experience two-three orgasms during sex, the first almost always from direct stimulation and the others from just the penetration.

We a GREAT bout of sex a few nights ago and she came again and again and again until she was literally locked in one long continuous orgasm than spanned about three minutes. I think she could've gone longer if I could've...lol. She was so crazy at that point that no amount of mental control was going to help me last any longer. It was beautiful, sexy, and incredible intense!

 

[Avery_Chisholm]

ITA with limb i can cum with both sex and clitoral stimulation, its just a matter of getting the positions right etc