OMG - My Story's Up!

[Chanson_bleu]

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=14405
I'm curious to know if Chap. 1 makes you want to read more. Don't worry, there's plenty more. My main goal for the story was to present well-developed, sympathetic characters (luckily, who like to have sex a lot). Did I succeed?

I'm so proud and nervous...

 

[Sonia_de_Beaumanoir]

v ery, VERY, good

In my limited experience, this is the best first story submission I've read here. No typos or misspelled words here to mar the flow. This shows what a good editor combined with good writing can do.

My only minor remark was that all of the dialog in the final sex scene was internal voice. I wonder if the protagonist shouldn't be speaking aloud to Sasha at some point.

 

[Chanson_bleu]

Thank you thank you thank you! You just made it all worthwhile for me!

 

[CelticsHeart]

From a fellow newbie:

A lovely read....easy to "insert" oneself into the scenario!
I really enjoyed it!