Oliphant in the paper today.

[Shankara20]

This Oliphant rang so true for me today I am still processing it.

I am a product of Catholic nuns and their grade school system of the 50's. This cartoon set off a thought process about how I relate to females in BDSM settings - and the additional impact of a domineering abusive alcoholic mother to boot. (I do think I recognize that nun in the drawing)

I seems to me that when I Top a female I do so for her pleasure (and if she is happy I will survive at least one more day), but when I Dominate a male I do so for my pleasure. I am fully aware of the possible implications for my choices of Top with female partners and Dominate with male partners - and that differentiation awareness is new to me in this moment.

http://i52.photobucket.com/albums/g38/nbright1969/934580907b70012f2fe000163e41dd5b.gif​

What about for you - anything here?

 

[Licia]

My gut response:

Ju-jitsu sister nun.

Ignore bird.

Hug boy until he feels better/collects himself.

Snap ruler.

Take the kids on a science field trip.

 

[intothewoods]

I've never experienced Catholic schools but it has always seemed to me that there would be a lot of, er, grist for the mill there.

I do seem to relate to most male PYLs in a similar way whereas there is a lot more range in female PYLs. Some are more cold, distant school marm types and others are more sort of kindly mothering types, just to name a couple. I suppose it depends on the important authority figures in your life growing up.

 

[Shankara20]

Take the kids on a science field trip.

not sure all those sorts of schools believe in science...

 

[Shankara20]

I suppose it depends on the important authority figures in your life growing up.

So it appears for me, especially my relationships with XX types...

 

[Licia]

not sure all those sorts of schools believe in science...

Who wouldn't be curious as to how the natural world functions?

Sister nun isn't XX, neither the dignity of xx (...hope you don't mind me using those descriptions). Maybe I'm not XX either because I *want* to give her ju jitsu. Primal where kids are concerned, I guess.

Adult playmates are a different issue. Boundaries seem to be tethered by fear? *ponders*

 

[Shankara20]

Boundaries seem to be tethered by fear? *ponders*

Interesting. Fear based on past experience or the unknown? I guess it could be fear from one or the other.

Someone told me years ago that fear that turns you cold is fear of an unknown, fear the makes you break out in a sweat is fear based on past experience (I thing I have the correct )

Now Shank *ponders*...

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

Interesting. Good cartoon too.

I have a religious kink that, just when I think it's dead, rises from the dead and strides from my cerebral tomb.

Did your upbringing leave you with religious predilections?

 

[Stella_Omega]

Mmm... That cartoon is putting the blame for that man's abusive nature on women.

Which Shank, let me be clear here- is NOT doing. Quite the opposite;

It seems to me that when I Top a female I do so for her pleasure (and if she is happy I will survive at least one more day),

Oh baby that is SO SEXY. And it describes the dynamic that I wrote into my never-to-be-finished opus " Sarabande"

I go into a discourse on the differences between "topping" and "dominating" at least once a week, I bet.

 

[JMohegan]

"That man" is an exceedingly powerful world leader with alleged divine backing for his sexist, homophobic policies and tax-exempt efforts to influence politics in America. Metaphorically spanking U.S. nuns over their supposed flirtation with feminism is just the tip of the iceberg.

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

The cartoon's bashing the Pope's late attacks on U.S. nuns for their "radical feminism." For not being, among other things, anti-women enough. Everyone I know of a certain age who did Catholic schools still remembers nunslaps with terror, so the idea of his using that as an excuse to impose his crazy-ass views - as friggin POPE - is, to me, well-mocked.

 

[JMohegan]

Mmm... That cartoon is putting the blame for that man's abusive nature on women.

Which Shank, let me be clear here- is NOT doing. Quite the opposite;
Oh baby that is SO SEXY. And it describes the dynamic that I wrote into my never-to-be-finished opus " Sarabande"

I go into a discourse on the differences between "topping" and "dominating" at least once a week, I bet.

I hope he won't mind me saying so, but I read Shank's OP as very poignant. The defensive nature of his Topping - if she's happy, then he can survive - strikes me as sad.

I'm not saying he's wrong to give women pleasure, obviously. It just pisses me off that abusive authority figures destroyed his ability to take M/f pleasure in return.

 

[JMohegan]

The cartoon's bashing the Pope's late attacks on U.S. nuns for their "radical feminism." For not being, among other things, anti-women enough. Everyone I know of a certain age who did Catholic schools still remembers nunslaps with terror, so the idea of his using that as an excuse to impose his crazy-ass views - as friggin POPE - is, to me, well-mocked.

Yes, exactly.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

... I am a product of Catholic nuns and their grade school system of the 50's....

I am the product of approximately two hours of Catholic nuns and their grade school system in the 50s... 1959 IIRC.

My parents thought - in mid-schoolyear - I might get a more rigorous (and complete) education, which might keep me out of trouble, in a Catholic grade school. About two hours into the day, the sister teaching our class heard someone whispering in my vicinity and accused me of being the culprit. She strode to my seat and demanded my hand. Not knowing any better, I said, "It wasn't me whispering, Sister," as I stuck my hand out. "Three more for lying," she said, and brought the ruler down on the palm of my hand.

As she brought it down for another smack, I grabbed the damn thing with my other hand, ripped my stinging hand from hers, broke the ruler and threw it in her face. "I told you it wasn't me," I shouted. "You can go straight to hell," I added on my way out the door.

I was back in public school the next day. I've never liked nuns since, not even Mary Tyler Moore or Sally Fields. The single exception is Julie Andrews.

 

[JMohegan]

I am the product of approximately two hours of Catholic nuns and their grade school system in the 50s... 1959 IIRC.

My parents thought - in mid-schoolyear - I might get a more rigorous (and complete) education, which might keep me out of trouble, in a Catholic grade school. About two hours into the day, the sister teaching our class heard someone whispering in my vicinity and accused me of being the culprit. She strode to my seat and demanded my hand. Not knowing any better, I said, "It wasn't me whispering, Sister," as I stuck my hand out. "Three more for lying," she said, and brought the ruler down on the palm of my hand.

As she brought it down for another smack, I grabbed the damn thing with my other hand, ripped my stinging hand from hers, broke the ruler and threw it in her face. "I told you it wasn't me," I shouted. "You can go straight to hell," I added on my way out the door.

I was back in public school the next day. I've never liked nuns since, not even Mary Tyler Moore or Sally Fields. The single exception is Julie Andrews.

Holy shit, Winston. What did your parents say?

I'm trying to imagine what my parents' reaction would have been, but they both consider corporal punishment to be lazy discipline and immoral to boot, so I never would have been in a school like that to begin with.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

Holy shit, Winston. What did your parents say?

My parents *did* believe in corporal punishment, but only for the guilty. Fortunately, they also knew that I almost always owned up to my misdeeds. When I told them that I had been punished for something I hadn't done - and they believed me - my dad laughed, my mother just rolled her eyes and sighed, and they agreed I wouldn't have to go back. They didn't even bitch much about the registration fees they were sure they wouldn't get back (and they were right). A couple years later, my dad, apropos of nothing I could discern, said, "I wish I could have seen that nun's face when you broke her ruler," and laughed again. Of course, he was drunk at the time, so God/dess only knows what he was thinking about, or why.

 

[Edith_UK]

I am the product of approximately two hours of Catholic nuns and their grade school system in the 50s... 1959 IIRC.

My parents thought - in mid-schoolyear - I might get a more rigorous (and complete) education, which might keep me out of trouble, in a Catholic grade school. About two hours into the day, the sister teaching our class heard someone whispering in my vicinity and accused me of being the culprit. She strode to my seat and demanded my hand. Not knowing any better, I said, "It wasn't me whispering, Sister," as I stuck my hand out. "Three more for lying," she said, and brought the ruler down on the palm of my hand.

As she brought it down for another smack, I grabbed the damn thing with my other hand, ripped my stinging hand from hers, broke the ruler and threw it in her face. "I told you it wasn't me," I shouted. "You can go straight to hell," I added on my way out the door.

I was back in public school the next day. I've never liked nuns since, not even Mary Tyler Moore or Sally Fields. The single exception is Julie Andrews.

Yerrrrrr, Winston, liking that mate

 

[Licia]

Interesting. Fear based on past experience or the unknown? I guess it could be fear from one or the other.

Someone told me years ago that fear that turns you cold is fear of an unknown, fear the makes you break out in a sweat is fear based on past experience (I thing I have the correct )

Fight or flight comes to mind. Tricky, that. Psychologists postulate that fight can be learned or cultivated; however, the response is normally fixated in the subconscious.

My default has always been fight. Due to years of defending my body, I've learned to recognize when the button is pushed. Cold is the sensation which I always experience now as it has a calming, centering effect to the sadist restrained in threads. Unfortunately, men are always subject to this in my world because the more dominant types tend to get snatchy or worse.

Sexually open and completely comfortable with depravity, I do not *need* bondage or force. Yes, I *want* to play with/sexually harass you, but the terms are mine. My biggest wish is to pervert everything ya thought ya knew about women, and show an unflinching glimpse of my own (and our) sexuality.

Disclaimer: italics are internal dialogue regarding men in general. Send inappropriate PMs and receieve an ego in shreds. This disclaimer is in specific regards to recent activity as I only become inappropriate with who I see fit.

I'm not saying he's wrong to give women pleasure, obviously. It just pisses me off that abusive authority figures destroyed his ability to take M/f pleasure in return.

I was back in public school the next day. I've never liked nuns since, not even Mary Tyler Moore or Sally Fields. The single exception is Julie Andrews.

Food for thought, guys.

 

[Shankara20]

Did your upbringing leave you with religious predilections?

Indeed it did. A good deal on my interests draws to resolving the seeming contradictions in the words religions use vs the actions they take.

I love ritual, some forms of mysticism, and find much of the music uplifting despite the fact that "resigned" from the Holy Roman Catholic Church about 8 years ago be sending the local bishop the ashes of my baptism certificate and a letter taking for myself the ability to deal with the Divine directly, no longer needed an emissary.

You?

 

[Shankara20]

Which Shank, let me be clear here- is NOT doing. Quite the opposite;
Oh baby that is SO SEXY. And it describes the dynamic that I wrote into my never-to-be-finished opus " Sarabande"

I will say that I have found favor with some for the quality.

I go into a discourse on the differences between "topping" and "dominating" at least once a week, I bet.

Ahhh yes, a discussing never ending. It took self reflection for me to finely sort out the differences - and more than one thread here as well.

 

[Shankara20]

"That man" is an exceedingly powerful world leader with alleged divine backing for his sexist, homophobic policies and tax-exempt efforts to influence politics in America. Metaphorically spanking U.S. nuns over their supposed flirtation with feminism is just the tip of the iceberg.

Spot on.

 

[Shankara20]

I hope he won't mind me saying so, but I read Shank's OP as very poignant. The defensive nature of his Topping - if she's happy, then he can survive - strikes me as sad.

I'm not saying he's wrong to give women pleasure, obviously. It just pisses me off that abusive authority figures destroyed his ability to take M/f pleasure in return.

Therapy is helping. Really.


As an adopted child I was told several times by a drunken mother that if I was not the sort of child she wanted I could always be returned to the orphanage - a threat I internalized and, to my detriment, projected onto most of my relationship with females of authority including Wives, Ma'ans bosses, lovers, ever bottoms (not a good thing if ones wants to be a Dom, but not so bad in a Top).

The nuns did not help much when their threat was of eternal damnation

 

[Shankara20]

, "I wish I could have seen that nun's face when you broke her ruler," and laughed again. .

way cool....

 

[Netzach]

No slap was as damaging, reports told me, as a nun telling a kid who knew otherwise that dinosaurs and fossil records were put into the earth by the devil to confuse people. Then it's like you KNOW you are being trapped with insane people in charge of you.

 

[JMohegan]

Fight or flight comes to mind. Tricky, that. Psychologists postulate that fight can be learned or cultivated; however, the response is normally fixated in the subconscious.

My default has always been fight. Due to years of defending my body, I've learned to recognize when the button is pushed. Cold is the sensation which I always experience now as it has a calming, centering effect to the sadist restrained in threads. Unfortunately, men are always subject to this in my world because the more dominant types tend to get snatchy or worse.

Sexually open and completely comfortable with depravity, I do not *need* bondage or force. Yes, I *want* to play with/sexually harass you, but the terms are mine. My biggest wish is to pervert everything ya thought ya knew about women, and show an unflinching glimpse of my own (and our) sexuality.

Disclaimer: italics are internal dialogue regarding men in general. Send inappropriate PMs and receieve an ego in shreds. This disclaimer is in specific regards to recent activity as I only become inappropriate with who I see fit.





Food for thought, guys.

Beyond the notion that you don't want PMs (and fear not! I have no intention of sending any), I've got no idea what you're trying to tell me here.

If you want to try again, please rephrase. If not, no big deal, enjoy your weekend.