Older Male Seeking Female Friends Who Can Tolerate "Dad Jokes"

[lifeis2short2b]

I have this fear of elevators.

Im taking steps to cure it

 

[freakynshy]

So... once again, I'm reduced to "talking to myself".... I posted on June 2 and as of today my post has about 80 views and zero replies. Clearly I am "in high demand" and struggling to keep up.... Seriously, I'm replying to myself for two reasons: 1) I'm not very familiar with Literotica and I'm curious to see if a reply will cause my post to appear closer to top of the list. If not, nothing lost; and 2) To share my current favorite "dad joke". The dad joke starts with the prompt: "What is the most appropriate song by the group "Journey" to play at a funeral?" If nobody replies to me, I will provide the answer... I'll do it. I will!!

I love dad jokes! I'm not so good at serving them up though.

this is something that stuck with me since middle school...
what's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
you can hear a hormone

 

[Lichen2CU]

What did the shy traffic light say to the Jaguar?

Welcome...

 

[Lichen2CU]

How does a penguin build its house?

Igloos it together

Of course!!!

 

[Lichen2CU]

I love dad jokes! I'm not so good at serving them up though.

this is something that stuck with me since middle school...
what's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
you can hear a hormone

I love dad jokes! I'm not so good at serving them up though.

this is something that stuck with me since middle school...
what's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
you can hear a hormone

Welcome!

 

[Lichen2CU]

I have this fear of elevators.

Im taking steps to cure it

Good one!

 

[NCneedslove_18]

Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers?

They say he made a mint!

 

[TheWorldBuilder]

Do you know what's odd around here?

 

[dawn_of_night]

Every other number?

 

[TheWorldBuilder]

Close enough.

 

[nakedginger]

Hello.
Love this thread

 

[Shygentleman2]

What do you call a Bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

 

[NCneedslove_18]

Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?

He pasta-way

 

[NCneedslove_18]

What do you call a cow with two legs?

Lean beef

 

[Eisranac]

Could someone please explain to me why using pepper spray on someone is considered assault?

 

[Deadbed1968]

What do you call a cow with two legs?

Lean beef

What do you call a cow with no legs?



Ground Beef

 

[nakedginger]

One I heard at work, there's a guy in IT who keeps telling them to me.

Some people ask if the money I spent on my obsession with pasta bothers me but I don't regret a single penne.

 

[Shygentleman2]

Half of today’s Chevy trucks are still on the road today.

The other half made it home.

 

[Lichen2CU]

Hello.
Love this thread

Glad you like it! Welcome aboard...

 

[Lichen2CU]

Could someone please explain to me why using pepper spray on someone is considered assault?

THAT is an excellent question,,,

 

[TheWorldBuilder]

A vicar, a Rabbi and an Imam walk into a bar.

"Is this a joke?" said the landlord.

 

[Shygentleman2]

This morning, I was walking down the street and I was hit by a violin, then a clarinet and then a french horn.

I think it was an orchestrated attack.

 

[jonnoback]

Everytime my bike hurts me, I punch it right back. It’s a vicious cycle.

 

[Shygentleman2]

My wife seemed disappointed with the plate of dried fruit I served for dinner

She’s the one who’s always going on about “date night”

 

[nakedginger]

My work colleage came out with this one.
What cars to sheep drive?
Lamborghini