Mr. Crimson
Sexiest Mouse in America
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Today's question of the day: Does OU or OSU win today?
Oklahoma
- Thread starter Vincam
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Mr. Crimson
Sexiest Mouse in America
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Well, OU used Sooner Magic to beat Baylor in double overtime, OSU..... not so lucky. Did you go to OSU or do you just cheer for them to be different?
sun_shyne
what do u want me to be?
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giggles1 said:I'm still looking for some jokes. Good....bad....okay for church....okay only for the locker room....... I'm open and willing to listen to the all.
Anyone ???
Its not the best, but heres one that i got in my email, i thought it was sorta funny, sorry its so long:
You know your living in 2005 when....
1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.
6. You go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner.
7. You make phone calls from home and you accidentally dial "9" to get an outside line.
8. You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.
10. You learn about your redundancy on the 10 O'clock news.
11. Your boss doesn't have the ability to do your job.
12. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cellphone to see if anyone is home.
13. Every commercial on television has a website at the bottom of the screen.
14. Leaving the house without your cellphone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic... and you turn around to go back and get it.
15. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.
16. You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
17. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
18. You are too busy to notice there was no No.9 on this list.
19. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a No 9 on this list.
Mr. Crimson
Sexiest Mouse in America
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Knock-knock jokes probably don't work very well on here, do they?
Mr. Crimson
Sexiest Mouse in America
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Maybe I'll go get some laffy taffy and use those jokes.sun_shyne said:
Mr. Crimson
Sexiest Mouse in America
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Like this timeless gem:
How do you mend a broken jack-o-lantern? With a pumpkin patch.
How do you mend a broken jack-o-lantern? With a pumpkin patch.
giggles1
Really Experienced
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I found this one on another post....
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19-year-old dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.
She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."
Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her. The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.
On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lb. as promised.
He calls the company and orders their 5-day, 20 lb. program.
The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me"
Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her; but when he does, it's worth every muscle cramp and wheeze.
For the next four days, the same routine happens.
Much to his delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself only to discover that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised.
He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day, 50 lb. program.
"Are you sure?" asks the representative. "This is our most rigorous program."
"Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."
The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge, hairy male standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, you're mine.
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19-year-old dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.
She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."
Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her. The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.
On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lb. as promised.
He calls the company and orders their 5-day, 20 lb. program.
The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me"
Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her; but when he does, it's worth every muscle cramp and wheeze.
For the next four days, the same routine happens.
Much to his delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself only to discover that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised.
He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day, 50 lb. program.
"Are you sure?" asks the representative. "This is our most rigorous program."
"Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."
The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge, hairy male standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, you're mine.
sun_shyne
what do u want me to be?
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giggles1 said:A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19-year-old dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.
She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."
Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her. The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.
On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lb. as promised.
He calls the company and orders their 5-day, 20 lb. program.
The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me"
Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her; but when he does, it's worth every muscle cramp and wheeze.
For the next four days, the same routine happens.
Much to his delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself only to discover that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised.
He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day, 50 lb. program.
"Are you sure?" asks the representative. "This is our most rigorous program."
"Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."
The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge, hairy male standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, you're mine.
OMFG...that is too funny...i like that one....
giggles1
Really Experienced
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- Jan 11, 2003
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- 246
Look what I found !!!
A father and son went hunting together, for the first time.
The father said "Stay here and be very QUIET, I'll be across the
field." A while later, the father heard a blood curdling scream
and ran back to his son. "What's wrong?" the father asked.
"I told you to be quiet."
The boy, bless his heart, answered; "Look, I was quiet when the snake
slithered across my feet. I was quiet when the bear breathed down my
neck. I didn't move a muscle when the skunk climbed over my shoulder.
I closed my eyes and held my breath when the wasp stung me. I didn't
cough when I swallowed the gnat. I didn't cuss or scratch when the
poison oak started itching. But when the two chipmunks crawled up my
pant legs ! and said, 'Should we eat them here or take them with us?'
Well ... I guess,I just panicked."
A father and son went hunting together, for the first time.
The father said "Stay here and be very QUIET, I'll be across the
field." A while later, the father heard a blood curdling scream
and ran back to his son. "What's wrong?" the father asked.
"I told you to be quiet."
The boy, bless his heart, answered; "Look, I was quiet when the snake
slithered across my feet. I was quiet when the bear breathed down my
neck. I didn't move a muscle when the skunk climbed over my shoulder.
I closed my eyes and held my breath when the wasp stung me. I didn't
cough when I swallowed the gnat. I didn't cuss or scratch when the
poison oak started itching. But when the two chipmunks crawled up my
pant legs ! and said, 'Should we eat them here or take them with us?'
Well ... I guess,I just panicked."
Mr. Crimson
Sexiest Mouse in America
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- Posts
- 6,260
Those are good, here's long thinking one that seemed funny when I was younger.
There were these two guys in college, Bob and Steve, and they were trying to decide on what classes to take for the upcoming semester. They saw a class called deductive reasoning. Neither one knew what it was and the course description only said course designed to improve deductive reasoning skills. Steve had to get to class soon so Bob said he would ask the professor what it was to see if they should take it.
Bob goes to Professor Zane's office and Zane asks him to come in.
Bob: My friend Steve and I were thinking about taking your class next semester, but we're not quite sure what deductive reasoning is. Could you explain it to me?
Prof: It's a bit hard to explain, but I can give you an example.
Bob: Sure, that'll work.
Prof: Okay, do you have a dog.
Bob: Yes.
Prof: Well, if you have a dog, you probably have a place to keep the dog, like a dog house, right?
Bob: Yeah, that's right.
Prof: Well, if you have a dog house, you probably don't live in the dorm, so you probably live in an apartment or a house.
Bob: Yeah, I live in a house.
Prof: Since you're still in school and living in a house, you probably have a room mate, possibly a wife.
Bob: That's right, I live with my wife.
Prof: Since you have a wife, it's probably safe to say you're not gay.
Bob: Yeah, you're right again, that's amazing.
Prof: Well, that's an example of deductive reasoning, do you think you understand now?
Bob: I get it now, thanks Professor Zane.
Bob is really impressed with everything Professor Zane figured out and couldn't wait to meet back up with Steve and let him know what he found out.
Steve: Did you talk with the professor?
Bob: Yeah, he helped me a lot.
Steve: So what's deductive reasoning?
Bob: He gave me an example by asking me questions to explain it because it's hard to understand otherwise.
Steve: Oh okay, ask away.
Bob: Do you have a dog?
Steve: No.
Bob: Oh, then you're gay.
There were these two guys in college, Bob and Steve, and they were trying to decide on what classes to take for the upcoming semester. They saw a class called deductive reasoning. Neither one knew what it was and the course description only said course designed to improve deductive reasoning skills. Steve had to get to class soon so Bob said he would ask the professor what it was to see if they should take it.
Bob goes to Professor Zane's office and Zane asks him to come in.
Bob: My friend Steve and I were thinking about taking your class next semester, but we're not quite sure what deductive reasoning is. Could you explain it to me?
Prof: It's a bit hard to explain, but I can give you an example.
Bob: Sure, that'll work.
Prof: Okay, do you have a dog.
Bob: Yes.
Prof: Well, if you have a dog, you probably have a place to keep the dog, like a dog house, right?
Bob: Yeah, that's right.
Prof: Well, if you have a dog house, you probably don't live in the dorm, so you probably live in an apartment or a house.
Bob: Yeah, I live in a house.
Prof: Since you're still in school and living in a house, you probably have a room mate, possibly a wife.
Bob: That's right, I live with my wife.
Prof: Since you have a wife, it's probably safe to say you're not gay.
Bob: Yeah, you're right again, that's amazing.
Prof: Well, that's an example of deductive reasoning, do you think you understand now?
Bob: I get it now, thanks Professor Zane.
Bob is really impressed with everything Professor Zane figured out and couldn't wait to meet back up with Steve and let him know what he found out.
Steve: Did you talk with the professor?
Bob: Yeah, he helped me a lot.
Steve: So what's deductive reasoning?
Bob: He gave me an example by asking me questions to explain it because it's hard to understand otherwise.
Steve: Oh okay, ask away.
Bob: Do you have a dog?
Steve: No.
Bob: Oh, then you're gay.
Mr. Crimson
Sexiest Mouse in America
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You know I got to go to see the Hornets play last night against Sacramento, they don't look too bad at all.
sophia jane
Decked Out
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Just moved to NE Oklahoma.
Scooby_Dew
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Oklahoma Here
Mr. Crimson
Sexiest Mouse in America
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Welcome to the board
