Okie...I have to get this off my chest...

[SexySpiceAngel]

I am sure everyone is aware of all the school shootings and I don't know bout the rest of you but I believe the media is half responsible.

I know in the constitution, freedom of the press is a right but I believe they have too much freedom. Ever notice how when a school shooting happens and the will stop at nothing to provide every gorry detail...and the always glorify [even if it's negative] the killers and the ones responsible. It's like a real reality show. Some kids think it's just another way to get in the 'spotlight'.

>: >: >:

This really makes me angry, the less the media says, the better off the schools would be!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ANGEL DEL MIGUEL

 

[Todd]

I agree with you about the media.

Ps you got me in here by deception, when you were talking about taking something off your chest I thought logically you were taking off your bra, but you were not you bug tease you

 

[Jade]

Sexyspiceangel:

I agree with you that the media definetely has an influence on many levels, especially concerning our children and teenagers.

However, there is so much more that goes into the mental and spiritual growth of any human.

Certain politicians and other such important "icon-like" figures (whom I will remain nameless) calling these people names essentially... that's not helping.

Also, parents... NO I don't think we should be jailing the parents of the killers, etc. That is such bullshit.
However, it's parents on both ends.
I hope I don't get too much crap for this but in some of these cases in the past, some of these children were incited until the peak of anger was just too much.

This is a HARD time to raise children.
I am not sure that I will EVER have another ... not EVER!

Kids can be CRUEL, extremely... sure that's no reason to shoot them granted, but things can be a lot more "hellacious' than they were when we were all children.
I have a volunteer position with a youth group and their problems are real and different and extremely, emminentely more scary than the ones I dealt with.

The desire for "protection" grows and the more that grows so does the desire to become "defensive" and in some senses... malicious.
Eat or be eaten, right?

Anyway, it's a HUGE problem and sure the media plays a role... I believe in the freedom of the press, but the WAY it's all portrayed could DEFINETELY be changed.

It's really too bad that we can't glorify heros as much.
This in a huge sense relates back to watchamacallit's thread about Dale E. and then Marines ... and who receive more attention.

How to get famous REAL quick... especially in America??
Hmmmm

Need some attention? Got guns?

 

[kid cash]

i agree believe it or not. me and one of my freinds were just talking about this same thing today. and my freind told me that some kid. has been going around saying. that he is going to go to school tomorow. and shoot some people. he said that he even had a list of people. that he is going to shoot. i blame the media to its a sick sad world that we live in.

 

[Blackbich]

I agree with you, Jade. 100%. When you run for President, I'm voting for you!!!

 

[mnxx]

I agree with all of you.

I live near the most recent shooting, in San Diego. And it was all over the news. They treated it like a damn circus. Its a horrible disgusting thing and it was treated with no respect and no reverence.

Children need to be taught that death is real. Not a TV show.

 

[MinkSoul]

not having any children of my own, i can't speak from experience, i can only comment on what i see, and what i see is Very Depressing. i think it will happen again, maybe a couple of times.... it's a Big problem and it's not one that a "quick fix" is going to cure.

i don't think it's just a parenting thing......it's a community thing, Everybody's going to have to help on this one...... Everyone.

 

[Jade]

Awe Shucks...

I agree with you, Jade. 100%. When you run for President, I'm voting for you!!!

*blush*

My... but such flattery is not so desereved unto me... but thank thee for the kindness all the same.

*blush again*

 

[Laurel]

Also, parents... NO I don't think we should be jailing the parents of the killers, etc. That is such bullshit.
However, it's parents on both ends.

I agree wholeheartedly. Everyone likes to rant about what an awful world we live in, filled with violent video games and music and movies...mere centuries ago, kids were brought up in a world full of death and violence that makes most video games look like the Romper Room. Days when most babies born never made it to the age of three. Days when medicine was so crude that even the most minor injury would require amputation. Back when life really was "nasty, brutish, and short." Did kids shoot up schools? Murder each other? Not nearly at the rate they do now.

In some parts of the world, kids are still brought up in abysmal surroundings. Poor children in India, in the MidEast, in the Ozarks. Kids who look death in the face every single day. Still, these kids generally do not resort to violence.

It's not the culture. It's not TV or music. It's an economy that requires both parents to work to get ahead. Mom & Dad -exhausted from working long hours to keep the rent paid and the fridge full - aren't receptive when little Johnny needs to talk about the bullies at school, or the girl who called him a name, or his difficulties with a certain teacher. Teens - inexperienced and full of hormones & angst - are left to work through huge problems on their own. They do all right most of the time, but not as well as they'd do if they had advice from someone older. And when they make the wrong choice - when they handle a problem with violence - other kids die.

I talk to teens on my block all the time, and they ask me for advice on everything from friendships to dating to college. When I ask what their parents think about an issue, they shrug and say they haven't talked to them about it. Mom's too busy, they say. Dad's too tired. Even when the parents are home, they're too busy trying to unwind to listen. They don't make themselves available to their kids when their kids need them the most.

We can be apathetic and keep blaming Hollywood, the Internet, & music for the decline of our children, or we can take charge of their lives and provide them with the guidance they need, and desire. Shifting the blame to entertainment may make us all sleep a little better, but it does nothing to help our children.

 

[CreamyLady]

I have no problem with the initial reporting of such a tragedy. My troubles come when the "human" angle comes in -- interviews with everyone on the block who wants to talk, the 70 or so best friends of the shooters/victims, talking heads who know none of the facts but speculate for the cameras.

I think that the circus after the incident is damaging, because it lends a horrible validity to what was done. There are people who really do want that 15 minutes of fame, or even mere validation, and are desperate to get it. Some of them are children, and it scares the hell out of me that they seem to have easy access to firearms.

If this country honored parenting more, workdays would be shorter, there would be better childcare options, family time would be mandatory, and no one would take cell phones to Little League Games or Girl Scout outings. Pending that day, every parent who comes home tired and crabby is going to feel guilty and inadequate, and kids will be frustrated and resentful.

It brings a whole new dimension to Family Values, doesn't it?

 

[Jade]

Laurel: Yes exactly. And part of that is the barrier to the communication in the first place AND the fact that it needs to start early on and be done in a tactful manner.

Teens have a LOT to say... and it's sad b/c time and time again I meet up with these parents who really do care and they feel so shielded from their children's lives but they didn't "show" that they cared at times when it really mattered... and then something extreme has to happen for them to really take notice and realize.. and oftentimes.. that's just too damn late.


Creamy: Circus is a good word for it yea. I hadn't really given that aspect of it as much attention as I should have and really, that was an extremely valuable point.

 

[Laurel]

If this country honored parenting more, workdays would be shorter, there would be better childcare options, family time would be mandatory, and no one would take cell phones to Little League Games or Girl Scout outings. Pending that day, every parent who comes home tired and crabby is going to feel guilty and inadequate, and kids will be frustrated and resentful.

Amen. It irritates me when people talk about 'the good old days' before _______ (fill in the blank with movies, video games, rock n roll, whatever), as though nothing else in our culture has changed. Like everything is precisely and totally as it was 80 years ago, except now we have Rap music. This is obviously not the case.

The structure of the family has changed dramatically. Families are much less cohesive than they once were. Grandparents & aunts & uncles - and sometimes even spouses and siblings - are spread out all over the country. Both parents - or a single parent shouldering the responsibility alone - work 12-hour days to put their kids through college. Employers are ready to shunt you aside for a younger, childless employee, someone who'll be more "loyal" (i.e. slave away mindlessly) to the company. Parents are under pressure. Kids are under pressure. And we blame MUSIC and MOVIES for these tragedies?

Pullease.

 

[Jade]

Praise the Lawdy lawd... can we have an amen? Let me hear it one more time sistah! YEA!

 

[teresafannin]

Having been through a media onslaught much worse than what went on in San Diego, CL hit it on the nose. Within 2 weeks of the shooting, Leeza Gibbons had a local Dallas radio personality on her show, neighbors of the man who committed the shootings & Mark Fuhrman-NONE of those people had anything to do with what happened to us, but they got their 15 minutes of fame. I emailed Leeza wanting to know why the victim's story wasn't being told, never got a response & wasn't really suprised. I had to send a letter to the church to keep them from talking about my son because incorrect information about him was being printed in magazine articles that hurt his family & friends deeply. Everyone wants to be in the spotlight & too many times, the victim's end up being forgoten.

I also agree with the comments on parenting, the media is not responsible for how our kids are raised, we are. Anyone who has a child should be required to have some basic parenting skills classes, there would be a lot less messed up kids in this world. I made a choice to stay involved in Justin's life, to know his friends & to honestly be interested in how he was doing & what he was doing. It isn't hard to do & the relationship that we had was worth it.

 

[CRaZy]

Very astute comments all round. I think part of the angst facing our young people is the lack of ritual marking child to adult. We live in a society where children need to be educated for longer than ever before. Centuries ago, children began work in the coal mines or factories or fields or whatever was their destiny at a young age. Even in the first half of the twentieth century, in the Western world, there were clear expectations as to when most young people would start dating/finish school/begin work/get married etc. It may have been restricting but the rules were clear.

The complexity of our society dictates that there is no longer a delineation betwen child and adult. Children are often given adult responsibilities eg. handling large amounts of cash at their part-time job, allowed to drive a car, caring for younger siblings, yet on the other hand, they are told they must stay at school and cannot legally drink. Never before in history have young people been faced with such exciting possibilities yet such an uncertain destiny. If their parents have become lost in the roundabout of demands placed by our society, it is little wonder that these young people lash out so violently. Sadly, for some, the violence they see glorified in the media seems a suitable ritual to announce their place in the world. "Hey, look at me. I'm all grown up. I can use a gun." The media circus certainly presents an air of surreal celebration of the event thus reinforcing the sense of ritual to the disturbed teenager.

This thread also reminds me of an incident in Belfast about 10 years ago. Some young people were eating at a restaurant when an IRA bomb blast occurred. The bomb was designed to maim, not kill. It had been placed under a table and when it exploded it blew the legs off eight young people. The cameras recorded the victims being carried from the restaurant - shocked, bloodied, screaming. One of the female reporters was crying as she spoke, almost unable to recount the events. She was sacked the next day for being too emotional in her reporting. Unfortunately, this penchant for lack of feelings in reporting has become the accepted norm across the Western world. When the media bans genuine compassion and emotion by reporters of its news, we cannot expect children to appreciate the humanity and suffering behind real events.

[Edited by CRaZy on 03-13-2001 at 01:54 AM]

 

[Ally C]

Also, parents... NO I don't think we should be jailing the parents of the killers, etc. That is such bullshit.
However, it's parents on both ends.

I agree wholeheartedly.

We can be apathetic and keep blaming Hollywood, the Internet, & music for the decline of our children, or we can take charge of their lives and provide them with the guidance they need, and desire. Shifting the blame to entertainment may make us all sleep a little better, but it does nothing to help our children.

I AGREE with the above, BUT not entirely. When a wholesale (i.e. 'sell out') shift of blame takes place that would be wrong, but I don't think 'blame' can ever be attributed to this or that so finally. There are way too many factors to take into account (which is why I like to deride sociologists who try to measure the unmeasurable). I think two arguments (among many others) are being conflated here: entertainment versus 'our' responsibility (or lack of). If it's a clear cut case of people neglecting their children, then those self-same kids will be influenced (more than usual - however we define that) by other factors. Yet the child needs to develop and find itself through self-expression - accompanied by devoted parenting / caring. Just when you're getting the hang of it someone else pulls a gun ...

[... and those Liberals always overcook things. Any recipe that advocates liberal amounts of this, that and the next ingredient is a recipe for disaster]