Oh FUCK ME why don't you? The all-too-well-known problem of unequal sex drives.

[iDreamInNude]

I started a very intense relationship 3 months ago with a handsome, scarily intelligent, witty man. Although sex has been infrequent due to busy schedules, it has been, well, earth shattering for me. I've squirted, passed out from orgasms, screamed until my throat ached. And oh the times he's cum inside me, in my pussy, my mouth. He's never gone without such a release (well except when we fucked each other raw that one time) He has struggled with my "rougher" desires, and is hesitant but seems to want to try new things.

Not is it only physically marvellous, I have never been so emotionally connected with someone. And he has expressed the same to me many times.

And yet...

Last night whilst I eagerly sucked on him he sighs and says, "I think your sex drive is too much for me."

This is not the first time this has been brought up... just not so bluntly said.

I feel I should make you more aware of our sex habits. As I said, sex is infrequent as we live a fair distance apart and he is a full-time student. We do not go for hours at a time either. Perhaps an hour or two.

I could not help but feel hurt. "Am I really too sexual?" "Perhaps he doesn't find me that desirable?" I told him that I didn't know how to respond to that. And he didn't know what to say either. I am glad he told me, because I want to find a solution. I'm just not sure what that solution is.

I masturbate everyday almost and although I find it pleasurable, it hardly replaces having the warmth of someones skin slamming against you or simply moving softly under your hands.

I'm not open to finding other sex partners. I want to make this work with him. We do not want to separate because I am more sexually driven than him. It's just neither of us are sure how. And I am looking to creative minds for advice.

Please do share.

 

[sunandshadow]

This should probably be in the How To forum. But anyway, you might want to start by asking him how often he is naturally inclined to have sex. Then clarify whether he just feels tired from having sex too often, or whether he is uncomfortable to not be the one initiating, or whether he specifically finds it arousing when a woman acts hard-to-get.

 

[iDreamInNude]

Thank you. I moved my thread there.

I will ask him. He did tell me afterwards that since we have started having sex he has felt little need to masturbate for a few days after, since our "sessions are so intense"

Those are some relevant questions to ask I do believe.

 

[BradBigBrain]

Maybe he feels like he is complimenting you on how sexy you are.

"Baby, you're way to much for me. You're knocking my socks off."

"I don't even have to masturbate a few days after, you're so intense for me."

You really need to ask him what he means. Tell him for you it's off-putting when he says that you're too much.

 

[Scrubber]

How often did he masturbate before meeting you? Sounds to me like it may have been very regular and now that he does not feel the need so much it might be alarming him. He may be scared, for instance, that if your circumstances change and you are able to meet more often he will not be able to satisfy you.

 

[monkeyman057]

You're just going to have to talk with him about it.

Ask him what an ideal sexual relationship looks like to him. It's a fair question and one that he can probably answer without much introspection.

When you both know what the other wants, you can find a way to meet in the middle, but that's a conversation that you have to have with him.