Oh For a Woman...

[neonlyte]

A most difficult day. My young architect has split with her long term boyfriend. She has been here most of the day sobbing her heart out, with me trying to offer what comfort I can and trying to explain 'how men think'.

I haven't felt this much out of my depth since I posted my first story. It was so much easier with my daughter, my wife was there, she had two shoulders to cry on.

At least she'd stopped crying when she left, I really don't think there were any more tears left. And she called me a little while ago, as promised, to tell me she'd arrived home safely, but I fear this could continue for some weeks as a reconciliation seems to be out of the question.

I'm thinking of booking the SO on the next flight, not that I mind lending an ear, I feel she needs womanly ears in addition to mine.

 

[English Lady]

Having you to talk to has probably helped her alot, Neon -really. We just want to talk and someone to go "there, there" now and then It sounds like you've done well

 

[Vicious_Vicuna]

That's true. Often a woman just wants to have someone listen. No help offered, no advice given -- just the gift of listening. It's like air.

 

[neonlyte]

Thank you EL & V-V
There was a lot of listening involved.
The 'why do men behave like that' was difficult - I wanted to call them all bastards, but it didn't seem appropriate.

 

[English Lady]

Thank you EL & V-V
There was a lot of listening involved.
The 'why do men behave like that' was difficult - I wanted to call them all bastards, but it didn't seem appropriate.

i can understand that, but I think a "well i really can't speak for men as a species.." kind of answer is the best alround

 

[Guest]

I agree with the others... just being there and listening helps....
sometimes we will run around in circular logic as our hearts break and we don't really want you to tell us that all men are scum .... we just want to have our heart not feel broken anymore

 

[Roxanne Appleby]

You're a good man, Neon.

 

[minsue]

That's true. Often a woman just wants to have someone listen. No help offered, no advice given -- just the gift of listening. It's like air.

EGGZACHARY

 

[Selena_Kitt]

A most difficult day. My young architect has split with her long term boyfriend. She has been here most of the day sobbing her heart out, with me trying to offer what comfort I can and trying to explain 'how men think'.

I haven't felt this much out of my depth since I posted my first story. It was so much easier with my daughter, my wife was there, she had two shoulders to cry on.

At least she'd stopped crying when she left, I really don't think there were any more tears left. And she called me a little while ago, as promised, to tell me she'd arrived home safely, but I fear this could continue for some weeks as a reconciliation seems to be out of the question.

I'm thinking of booking the SO on the next flight, not that I mind lending an ear, I feel she needs womanly ears in addition to mine.

You did good, Neo.

 

[wornoutkeyboard]

Sorry to hear about it.

I always try to remember that I often look back at my previous BFs and think "WTF was I thinking?"

It is amazing how as we get older it is easier and easier to get perspective.

But don't tell her this. It never helps to hear it in the moment.

~WOK (getting older by the second)

 

[Guest]

I have some really classically bad BF choices in my past. Some were real big heartbreaks. Some made me miserable for a long time.

I don't regret any of them. I *DO* wonder what I was thinking about and I know I did stupid things. BUT each one was a learning experience, without which I might not have the wonderful husband and happy marriage I have now.

So, in a few weeks or months, when your young friend has recovered a little balance and can use her hindsight, you might remark that she now has new knowledge about relationships she could get no other way.

Or not Maybe just buy her some chocolate.

 

[Roxanne Appleby]

Sorry to hear about it.

I always try to remember that I often look back at my previous BFs and think "WTF was I thinking?"

It is amazing how as we get older it is easier and easier to get perspective.

But don't tell her this. It never helps to hear it in the moment.

~WOK (getting older by the second)

Boy ain't that the truth. (Not the you getting older part - I saw you in that miniskirt today . . . "

 

[NoJo]

That's true. Often a woman just wants to have someone listen. No help offered, no advice given -- just the gift of listening. It's like air.

I still forget that, to my cost -- I have a terrible impulse to try to "fix it" when women cry.

 

[English Lady]

I still forget that, to my cost -- I have a terrible impulse to try to "fix it" when women cry.

But that is enearing in itself, as long s you don't mind admitting it when you can't fix it

 

[Guest]

Men are such softies at heart - it's luvverly.

Neon, you did the best you could, and then some. She was lucky to have you around.

Joe: your impulse to want to "fix it" and can also be an invaluable thing for a woman to be aware of.