Not Good Enough

[lavender]

 

[Guest]

 

[Dillinger]

Yes... I have days like that. I think we probably all do. It sucks. But you'll get over it soon enough.

I think you need to watch a couple good comedy's or maybe Moulin Rouge?

 

[scylis]

No.

whenever you're down, you just snort more crack, don't you?

and i think you can already venture a guess as to my answer, lavy.

 

[sexy-girl]

you do set high standards for yourself lavender ... i hope you're not down on yourself because you think you've done something wrong

i guess the only way to cure yourself of it is to try and move on and do something new ... not always an easy thing to do though i know


i do get like that also and i guess i dont know the cure for it so i'd be interested to hear what advice people give you ... *hugs* take care lavender

 

[lavender]

 

[Pixie]

Change that to weeks, or months...yes.

 

[erosman]

I think my self-deprecation is a reflex. I tried propping myself up with auto-cheerleading, but it's too pretentious. The best thing for me is to sharpen my focus on others and their happiness. It usually gives me the boost I need to feel good about my life.

 

[lavender]

 

[Freya]

I'm having one of those days where you really feel you're not good enough for anyone or anything.

I get down on myself like this a lot. It's not really fun to deal with.

Do you have days like this? Do you get down on yourself to such a degree?

It's a horrible place to be. I'm trying to find the cure all to pull me out of this place I go to, from time to time.

The latter half of this week I was like that. I suck at parenting, I suck at friendship, I suck at relationships, I suck at life.

So what I did was listen to some people that boosted me up a bit, grabbed my best friend and went out last night and got some superficial validation. Nope, it doesn't make an ounce of difference with all the important things, but for some stupid reason, once I get that at times, I can start to realize that while people find me attractive on the outside, I'm pretty damn good inwardly as well. I got the superficial stuff taken care of, and being with my friend - for whom I am also a damn good friend - and being able to laugh and talk and let go of my shit - I woke up this morning knowing that I'm ok. It won't last forever - and when those feelings hit again, I'll find my friends and through their eyes remember again that I am worthwhile.

You're a good person Lav - I can tell that just by what I've seen of you on here. If you have to, take a look at yourself through someone else's eyes - it does help.

 

[Silverlily]

Absolutely I have those days. I get them when everything is going right. Hell, I get them when everything is stellar.

I fall into the trap of either a. thinking I had nothing to do with the "rightness", it was all luck or b. yeah, just once I pulled it off, but I'm not good enough to maintain it.

 

[lavender]

Re: Re: Not Good Enough

 

[Debbie]

Yes, but I am very hard on myself.

Lavy I have seen you do some of the kindest things for people here. Kind words, honest opinions and beyond that.

Don't be too hard on yourself.

 

[Simply Me]

I have days like that as well, I call it my dark place. I find myself pulling away from people, and turning angry at those that try to help. The only way I have found to deal with it is to curl up in my bed, hug my pillow, and pray it passes.

It's no fun to be there, I know.

 

[Freya]

Re: Re: Re: Not Good Enough

Sometimes it's trying to look at yourself through someone else's eyes that brings you even further down.

Then back away from those, and find someone that knows you for who you are, and still cares. Those are the eyes to look through.

 

[StrawberryPez]

I'm having one of those days. It seems nothing has gone right. I love the fall, and it was a beautiful fall day; but I didn't go outside. I didn't leave my house. I just couldn't bring myself to doing anything constructive.

I usually read on days like today, but I can't seem to get that motivation either. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

 

[RisiaSkye]

Re: Re: Re: Not Good Enough

Sometimes it's trying to look at yourself through someone else's eyes that brings you even further down.

I hear that. lav, we all have those days. It passes, as most things do, given enough time.

 

[scylis]

i should be working on a paper due tuesday.

 

[sexy-girl]

Re: Re: Re: Not Good Enough

Sometimes it's trying to look at yourself through someone else's eyes that brings you even further down.

i think also though everyone is their worst critic

 

[markb325]

Unfortunately I have those type of days quite often. I don't have to worry about others insulting me I do it quite goo on my own.

 

[JerseyBoy]

I'm having one of those days where you really feel you're not good enough for anyone or anything.

I swear I'm still thinking about that fantasy football trade...i am

 

[Laurel]

I'm having one of those days where you really feel you're not good enough for anyone or anything.

I get down on myself like this a lot. It's not really fun to deal with.

Do you have days like this? Do you get down on yourself to such a degree?

It helps to realize that your perception is off - that what you're feeling isn't reality. Everybody gets down every now and then. Just remember: you're the same person when you feel bummed & unworthy as you were when you felt happy & confident. The sadness is an illusion. You still rock just as hard as you ever have.

 

[TN_Vixen]

Re: Re: Not Good Enough

It helps to realize that your perception is off - that what you're feeling isn't reality. Everybody gets down every now and then. Just remember: you're the same person when you feel bummed & unworthy as you were when you felt happy & confident. The sadness is an illusion. You still rock just as hard as you ever have.

excellent advice.

 

[curious2c]

I think that everything in life runs in cycles. The body, the mind, hell even the weather, tides, etc. It is a natural cause and effect. When I get down like that I concentrate on all the good and positive things in my life. Doesn't always work, but it does help. I even keep a small list of the great things that have happened to me lately in my wallet. If I get real down I pull it out and read it. It reminds me of just past good things and helps to pick me up a bit. Then music of my favorite type continues the process of healing the mind. Things always seem to get better. sometimes it takes a while, but they still run the cycle and change for the better.

 

[erosman]

I guess I didn't explain myself well, lavy. When I say I attempt to focus on other's happiness, I try to affect someone's happiness. It's kind of an empathetic exercise. If I take my self-doubting focus and shelve it so that I can take up someone else's need/happiness. I usually get myself back on track. I know you know the feeling of helping, and the way it centers life's purpose away from your own current needs. When I am low, I search out someone to help. There's usually no shortage either.

hugs