Not about sex.............

[Wizard]

Hi Guys and Girls,

Recently the wife has gone back to work and we have two kids 11 and 7 , our question is for the parents or anyone else really but when did you first leave your kids "Home alone"
Around here we have had small ,small kids left home alone and they were just to young to be home alone.
There are a few times that it would be nice like 1/2 hour to and hour at a time that we need to find someone to watch the kids to to working overtime or going in early.
I'm NOT talking about for an 8 or 12 hour shift but small amounts of time..........I understand it depends on the kids and I think mine could handle it. We were thinking of trying it out , maybe in the evening run down to the store (5min) away and back just to see how they would make out.

What do other parents do when both parents work? My wife was a stay at home mom till now...............

Any advise?

 

[Xander]

Sorry Wizard, no advise. But I do remember being left home alone for the first time when I was 8.
And boy was my dad pissed, when he found out I had gone through all his stuff while he was gone....hehehehe

 

[Wizard]

My problem too..............I have any thing improtant locked up in a large footlocker...........

 

[Sammyjo]

Well, my daughter is only 6, so I'm not dealing with this quite yet...besides, there are 4 other people besides us living here...when would she BE alone?

I think I stayed home alone when I was 7. I was very mature for my age, so could be trusted early on. I guess it depends on the maturity level of your kids, and how well they get along.

I went to pick my kid up from a neighbor's house, only to find that the parents had vanished at some point. Poor parenting on their part. I don't think I'd leave if I was entrusted to care for someone else's child. Only they are relatives so I guess I can't shoot them or anything. Their kids are 8 and 10.

Since the oldest is 11, you may be able to keep them alone there for short periods of time. You could try running to the gas station or to the market to pick up a few items. If they house is still standing, and there are no dead or even slightly hurting bodies laying around, start going for longer periods of time. I don't think you will have any problems, your children have been raised by two wonderful parents who have taught them some very important things...they will be fine...and so will you.

 

[KillerMuffin]

Sorry Wizzie, I'll have to veto the idea as well, even thought the 11 year old could probably handle the responsibility of babysitting the 7 year old for half an hour every once in a while. However, this is a mindset that gets very easy to abuse. After all, a half hour isn't so bad, why not add 15 minutes here and there? We're human, we booboo.

Second consideration. Someone is gonna call social services, we live in the world of nosy neighbors who know how to raise your children better than you do. Don't believe me? ask them. (this sucks gangrenous donkey dick too)

Our solution when we encountered this problem. We had a 45 minute schedule overlap and a neighbor we trusted. So she would watch our son (he was an infant so that was more work) during those times and we mowed her lawn and put the trash on the curbside on Tuesdays.

 

[Naked Hunny]

I dont know i was left home alone at the age of 8 just a half hour in the time lapse between me getting out of school and my mom getting home from work!! I was 12 when my mother left me home alone with my brother for the first time. We were both alive and no harm done but I was also a very grown up 12 yr old it was just my mother brother and I for almost 5 years at that point. You need to base this one on your childrens maturity level sweetie!! If I was a lil closer id come babysit for ya!!

 

[Renee]

I have no kids so I can't help you as far as a parents opinion goes.. BUT, I do know that here in NJ the law says that you are not allowed to leave anyone under 14 home alone. So, maybe you can find out if they have any kind of laws like that where you are, and that may help guide you.

As far as what do parents do when they both work... I have friends who swear by afterschool or extended school programs. It's a long day for the kids but at least the parents know they are safe.

 

[Savage Kitten]

Wizzie... I've been thinkin about this too

mine are real close in age to yours.. my oldest will be 11yr in a couple weeks.

I live in town now and I have ran to the store real quick (or to get a pizza)(i never go further than just a couple miles) and left them home cause they were in the middle of a movie or something.. but i always carry my pager and my oldest knows how to use it incase she needs me. I have strict rules: No answering the phone (unless they hear my voice on the answering machine) No answering the door, NO going outside for any reason, and NO absolutely NO cooking with the stove!!! I really trust my girls to do this but even so I have never left them for over a few minutes and them it is a rare occassion.

I have been trying to decide what would be an appropriate age for me to leave the oldest on in charge to watch the younger one while I go to work.. i think maybe not until she is 14yr or even 15yrs

I suppose it depends on how mature your children are already and how much responsibility they have been given thus far and of course the area you live in.

You could.. leave them at home and have a neighbor who is willing to keep an ear and eye out for them.. who your children know they can go to if anything was to occur out of the ordinary...

best of luck to ya guy
SK~

 

[Wizard]

I'm with ya totally KillerMuffin,

I too am concerend that someone would call me in and wind up lossing my kids over just running to the store the is what I wanted to know............

Thanks

 

[CreamyLady]

WitchsKat wasn't left home alone until she was 13. She was a very reliable kid, and would always call me when she got home. She only had herself to look after, though.

Thirteen was a good age for it.

 

[Siren]

SK is right Wizzie

 

[Wizard]

Thats my bigest fear.............

 

[Weird Harold]

Hi Guys and Girls,

Recently the wife has gone back to work and we have two kids 11 and 7 , our question is for the parents or anyone else really but when did you first leave your kids "Home alone"

I think most states have laws that set an age of 12 to 14 as the minimum age to be left alone. At the lucky ages of 7 and 11, both of your kids are too young to be alone from a legal standpoint. I think there is time minimum time included in most of the laws such as an hour that isn't considered "leaving them alone" which allows for a quick trip to the mailbox, or corner store.

In practical terms, I think your eleven year old could be left alone in some circumstances. However, the seven year old should always be supervised. Whether the older one is mature enough to handle that chore for a few minutes or an hour at a time, is something you'll have to decide.

One thing to consider, is that "maturity" at the age of 11 is a day to day thing. On a 'good' day, when there's a movie in the VCR or the kids are absorbed in their toys in the bedroom, you could move to Cleveland and back, and they'd never notice you were gone.

On a 'bad' day, when the kids are grumpy, fighting, and need hugs every five minutes, they'll miss you when you go into the bedroom for a clean hanky.

Other factors, like how well do your kids know the neighbors, can the kids turn to the neighbors for help when they're alone, how "childproof" your home is, and how "houseproof" your children are, all enter into the equation.

For the next couple of years, until the eldest is 14 or 15 and can be responsible for both, you're going to have to make a case by case decision as to whether they'll be safe when left alone.

 

[Guest]

Well, though I don't have a child even close to the "home alone" age, I might be able to help some. I think when I was around ten, my sister and I were left home alone from the time school got out until 5 when my mom got home. At 11 I started babysitting (only days) for a kid who was 3 years younger and the kid of my mom's friend. By 12 many families in the neighborhood trusted me to watch their children. Hopefully that helps some?

~Tiggs~
http://smilecwm.tripod.com/sd3/lise.gif

 

[CelestialBody]

 

[shit4brains]

I think 11 and 7 yr olds are too young to be left alone. Something could happen accidently or inadvertently.

Best to get a sitter or wait until they are of legal age in your state.

 

[Svedish_Chef]

Bud ummmm

Simply depends on what the older one is like... I mean I was left alone with my brothers (both younger) when I was 9 after school till mum and or dad came home about 5:30ish.

Then again we were sent up the street or down the pool without supervision at a relatively early age too... but I always had that sort of responsibility.

You probably have to hold off a bit until the kids adjust to one of you not being there every second of the day, and do it gradually...

Like having an ironing lady come in to do your ironing and keep an eye on them as well until you get home... or something like that anyway.


Hope you got your answer


Da chef

 

[SpecialK]

These $0.02 here and there are really adding up!

First check into the laws of your state to determine at what age a child is able to be left at home and/or babysit. Save yourself the legality hassles.

When I was 8 or 9 I started babysitting my younger siblings (my baby sister would have been 1-2 at the time).

Here, one has to be 12 to take a babysitting course and get a certificate enabling you to babysit (and that is babysit for non-family members, I think. Maybe I'm wrong here, but I'm under the impression that you could babysit siblings when you were younger.)

Depending on the maturity level of your children, I think this is a judgement call on your part. Are they mature enough to be able to handle this? How independent are your children now? Can they make themselves something to eat in the microwave? Do they know all the emergency numbers and would there be someone else they could call if something was to arise? Do you have reliable neighbours who could be counted on in any emergency? What about a teenager in the neighbourhood who could come over for that brief period of time? (However sometimes, you find yourself trusting your own children more than a babysitter.) I think a lot depends on the time of day as well. A 45 minute interval right around supper time probably isn't as bad as at nighttime. If I was you, Wiz, I would give this a trial run for a few days. Just make sure your children have express instructions like the ones suggested by CelestialBody.

I don't know if this is a good idea or not, it depends again on the maturity level of your children, but have you asked them about it? Would they feel better if someone was there? Or would they feel like you didn't trust them enough or didn't think they were responsible enough.

Another thought: how well do your children get along? If your 11 yr old and 7 yr old don't get along well, this might be problematic if one is left in charge of the other.

K

 

[Whispersecret]

I vote for waiting until they're older, too.

 

[dusk2dawn]

My son is way too young yet to be left alone. But when I was younger (I am an only child) I was staying by myself from the time I got home from school till my mother got home which was about 5:30 or so, I was about 8 years old at the time. I think it all depends on how much you can trust your children on there own. If there is a major problem, do you trust your oldest to deal with it or your nabours to help out if need be. The laws have changed since that time, so you might want to look into that so you will be not getting into any legal troubles if something should happen. I would say though that if the trust is there, leaving them alone for a short periods of time shouldn't be to big of a deal.

Dusk