new to bdsm and looking for friends and advice

[briallen]

Hi I'm Bri and Im new here. I consider myself a sub. I live in southern cali and I was wondering if any one knew if there are any clubs or people or chats or anything, something where I could possible learn even more about bdsm and possible meet some one? I'm Just very curious any help would be most appricated. Thank you.

Bri

 

[caela]

Welcome to the boards Bri. I'm not in your neck of the woods so I can't give you any specific names of groups but you could try googling "Munch + Southern California" and see what you get. Or keyword it with BDSM and Southern California as well. Either should get you at least a couple of groups, along with all the weird randomness you always get when googling something lol.

I'd also suggest using the search function here and seeing if you can't find a thread with a list of different munch groups since I know this sort of question has been asked before. And read through the Library sticky just for general information...LOTS of good stuff there!!!!

 

[YourCaptor]

Hi I'm Bri and Im new here. I consider myself a sub. I live in southern cali and I was wondering if any one knew if there are any clubs or people or chats or anything, something where I could possible learn even more about bdsm and possible meet some one? I'm Just very curious any help would be most appricated. Thank you.

Bri

Hi their Bri, socalian here

I know a little about the LA scene. I'm not really active, but have looked into it. Much of the organized scene is for gay men and femdom, so pay attention to what group the organization is catering too. Their is a club or two in Hollywood, its a sort of dungeon at which people get together. You need a membership, I don't know if its worth it, never been. Their are munches, but call them up or email them because over half of what you find on the web is no longer active.

The best thing you can do is just make lots of friends. Look through BDSM sites for people in your area and add them to your network. Even if they are outside your group of preference you can make more friends through them, and so on. Word of mouth is the best way to get anywhere here. Their are also a few email lists you can subscribe too. A lot of it is diamond in the rough type stuff.

Good luck, and are you in LA?

 

[briallen]

Dear Ceala & Your Captor,
Thank you so much for the kindness and information it is a very useful starting place for me. And yes I'm very close to LA. Thanks again

 

[VelvetDarkness]

You could always bite the bullet and advertise for a Dom/me on the BDSM Personals board here. Even if you don't find anyone suitable it'll get you chatting with people and discussing your desires and so on.

 

[PrincessGoddess]

Welcome Bri!

Welcome Bri, and I am so very glad that you are taking this most important step in your personal growth. Your initiative in doing one thing is to be applauded: asking questions. No question is too complicated or stupid when the answer can affect you in real life. Over my 30+ years in the lifestyle (oh my, am I getting an increased age?), I was impressed upon me the importance of finding a mentor. I recommend reaching out online, as in this forum, to begin the search for a mentor.

A cautionary word of advice: Do not immediately move in with a Dominant to get your questions answered. Falling into the trap of prostitution or human trafficking is common among subs today. Being restrained in a place by someone you do not know, and used sexually for their gratification, is NOT what you want.

If you have trouble finding a mentor whose advice is trustworthy, feel free to send me a private message. I will gladly give you information that is independently verifiable.

 

[licker4450]

Hi Bri and welcome to the board. I am new here myself although I am in the lifestyle for over 10 years.

It is best to read online what you can. There is a terminolgy exclusive to this lifestyle. (munch=gathering, meet&greet). Read about the experineces of others.

Finally, give yourself some time to learn about what this is all about. It is also best to remember safety in all that you do.