Naughty sex talk . . .

[Monazwx]

I'm not sure whether or not this been discussed before, but I'm wondering how I can feel more comfortable about talking dirty with my b/f. I have no problem telling him what I want and vice versa, but other than that, I feel weird about expressing my erotic side (although I practically live on the Lit. forum/boards now!).

Any suggestions?

 

[huskie]

OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH one of my favorite subjects!!!!

I'm still working on getting my wife to do this. Shes not kinky at all so its going to take a long time for me and a lot of work.

I suggest you start off slow. Kind of feel him out, so to speak. Say things like "God you feel so good inside me" and then later "God you cock feels so good in my pussy"...... make sense?

 

[Voosla]

I have the same problem, my b/f wants me to talk dirty to him, but I have no clue what exactly to say. We need more examples!!!!

 

[huskie]

I have the same problem, my b/f wants me to talk dirty to him, but I have no clue what exactly to say. We need more examples!!!!

examples:

"Fuck me! Fuck me hard baby" or "God your cock feels great"

or take out the cursing and "give it to me give it to me hard" and so on...........

or just tell him what you want even if he allready knows... just saying it makes it more erotic.... and be advised it will make him cum quicker.

 

[sabbathstorm]

Sometimes my partner will lead me on to some dirty talk. He'll start talking about a fantasy of his (or mine) and ask me how I would act/feel in that situation. Gradually, it gets into a little role playing. It's a good way to ease into it without trying to script it all in your head

 

[windycityman]

Sometimes my partner will lead me on to some dirty talk. He'll start talking about a fantasy of his (or mine) and ask me how I would act/feel in that situation. Gradually, it gets into a little role playing. It's a good way to ease into it without trying to script it all in your head

Role playing now theres a nice thing......You have to be comfortable with your partner too. Then things just seem to flow... start with small things ie ask him to do things to you....as time goes on it will just come to you (no pun intended)


WCM

 

[fivehole]

Mona......I believe you will feel more comfortable 'talking dirty' to your b/fwith more experience doing it. We are only comfortable in intimate areas of our lives when we feel safe and secure. When we 'talk dirty' to our lover, we must feel secure in the knowledge that he/she will not betray that confidence. Opening up to our lover can be soooo erotic!! Try "planning" your naughty talk before your next romantic interlude, close your eyes, envision the things that arouse you, imagine hearing them and saying them. I am sure that this in itself will be arousing to you. Good Luck

 

[huskie]

Personaly I think I would rather hear it from her rather than say it to her. But would say what ever turned my wife on. I'v also notice that the more noise I make, like huffing, puffing, moaning, and groaning This seems to realy get her turned on??

Normaly I would be quite. But some times I'll fake it some and make some noise just to see how she will respond.

 

[coolr]

here's a tip for "talking dirty" don't say the same thing over and over, like if all you say is fuck my pussy, fuck my pussy, or oh yeah fuck my tits, just fuck my tits, it gets boring to hear it over and over and over, so mix it up

 

[Monazwx]

You guys are great!

Sorry, had to go to class. Don't you just hate those pesky interruptions! These suggestions are really good. I never thought of the role playing before, so that's definitely on the list. My b/f thinks of me as a good girl in bed, so I want to surprise him, cause I know that this kind of talk turns him on (he told me).

How do I "mix it up"? I'm not good at "dirty" vocab. and I don't want to sound redundant. I mean, I read the Lit-E stories but I don't want to say cock and pussy all the time.

How does giving nicknames sound? Or different languages? Am I asking the wrong question(s)?

 

[Ice Princess]

I agree with fivehole that the initial discomfort starts to fade as you get more experience talking to your lover.

I can think of a couple of ideas that might help (but might not -- this is one of those areas where everyone reacts a little differently):

You could try reading a story to him. Choose something from Lit that you like and see how it feels reading it outloud to him.

You could record him a steamy message of some kind. If the message drives him wild with desire, it might inspire you for later live performances.

Save the dirty talk for when you are REALLY turned on. You might find it easier right before your orgasm, or just a few minutes before, once things are hot and heavy.

Don't worry about what words you can and cannot say. Stick to what turns you on, and don't worry if it's repetitious, or worry it might seem mild, etc. As you get more comfortable doing it, you may find your erotic vocabulary increases, but basically whatever gets you and your lover hot and bothered is exactly right.

I was very shy about these things myself initially, so I understand where you're coming from. It does get easier and oh, it is so much fun, so hang in there!

 

[ERrOtIc_Sparkxx]

~ I also enjoy... Dirty..Nasty talk. To hear and to speak.. Depending on.. the moment.. how my partner is reacting or being stimulated. *But Mona you said a few.. good suggestions.. as you get a bit more comfortable with "Dirty talking".. try a different language... for me spanish.. just gets me .. excited ! and the fact you saying something.. as you are actually doing it.. is verrry stimulating verbally & visually. Of coarse... the dirty words.. are all slang.. I have a audible lessons pak that actually teaches you how to say those... titilating words & sentences... am trying to find it so I can pass it on to you.. and those interested.. ("Baby..lame por favor mi gatito y clit..= Baby please.. lick my pussy & Clit.. Or..Deseo aspirar su martillo duro grande. y lamer sus bolas. = I want to suck your big hard cock.. and lick your balls.. ) (*Just moved..boxes galore.. when I do find it will give you and others the info)
Heres an option... go to Google search.. use their Language tools http://www.google.com/language_tools?hl=en <<~~Just type in what ever comes to mind ... slang... vulgar whatever and it will translate it to ether French,German,Spanish,Italian.. and 3 more languages from english to your ..preference of.. language. Also... a Lil Role play with your voice... is also a hot n errrotic such as.. a Lil accent' .. be it from a nice southern drawl... to a heavy accent foreign sexxx diva.. or even ... a Gal with a Brooklyn accent..
** Well seems like ~Sparkkxx~ is a Lil long winded here... So when I unpak that Language lessons on Spanish slang on ..love making ..I'll be back with a Info Post

 

[windycityman]

well.....dirty talk can be cheap or it can be meaningful....so lets get i together here.....

 

[Monazwx]

More amazing thoughts!

Thanks IP. It's good to hear from others who were in my shoes. I will also take your advice to heart.

Spanish? Sounds doable and muy bien! I'll be waiting for your info. Sparkxx. Gracias!

 

[Guest]

If you are the woman be sure to never ask the question, "is it in"?

 

[Guest]

Great Ideas

These are all great ideas, Mona. The most encouraging thing is that you want to try. That's most of the battle right there. I teach a college course in Human Sexuality and we talk about this in the section on communication. Some people get nervous just because the word "dirty" is attached--"talk dirty" I tell them that it's not talking dirty, it's just saying out loud how you feel. For example, if you like giving head, it's such a nice thing to say, "I love how your cock feels in my mouth." And it is a turn on to hear, yet all it is is simple honesty.

Sabbath is right about a little role playing. Playing makes you feel a little less like you and more like an actor. And it's fun.
I dated a woman who thought talking dirty was slutty and that made her nervous. We talked and I asked her what a slut was and what a slut did. Then I asked her to pretend she was a slut and act like one and encouraged her and applauded her performance. She really got into it and found it turned her on, yet she felt safe because she was pretending. That broke the ice and she went on to really enjoy being a "bad girl" in bed.

Ice is right about needing to be turned on. The more turned on you get, the more you can let go, and letting go is really the turn on in sex. An old girlfriend and I used to tease each other crazy by building excitement before we even got undressed. We would kiss and kiss and then tell each other what we wanted to do and how we felt. Just her saying her panties were wet and she wanted to unzip my pants and stroke my cock was so intense and fun.

Good luck and keep practicing. You accept your boyfriends desires and are willing to experiment. He is a lucky guy to have a real partner, so you will get far together. I am a grown man with a Ph.D. who still loves the words "naughty" "panties" "titties" and "pussy" I guess I will just have to accept my likes and find someone who enjoys it too.

Keep us informed about your progress, Mona.

Steve

 

[Professor]

oops

opps, the above post was me. Guess I forgot to log in.

 

[petrel]

I sometimes wish I could plug a mic into my head so I wouldn't have to try and get the words out of my mouth. I constantly think really dirty stuff but saying it out loud is very hard.
I guess your parents really do screw you up don't they? I had a very 'nice' upbringing and I was 22 before I could swear comfortably in front of relatives or my parents!
I still don't feel comfortable using sexual swear words. Not because it is bad or naughty but becuase I grew up thinking that people who used words like fuck, bitch, cunt etc were ignorant, trashy and loutish!
Me and my brother were very 'well spoken' children but it does make it difficult to let loose now!!

 

[Eric623]

It was a beautiful spring evening. The moon was rising over the rugged desert mountain to our south, illuminating the sahuaro cacti. We had found our way to this large rock where we sat down and began making out like school kids. After I had spent about half an hour between her legs licking, sucking and nibbling on every inch of her drenched, swollen womanhood I had to come up for air. We kissed passionately and then she whispered in my ear, "I want you inside of me." That was several years ago, and I can tell you it had to be the most erotic moment of my life. I'll never forget that, never. Just talking dirty has it's thrills, but a quiet, well timed, gentle reminder of what you'd like to have done, or a nice compliment on what he has just done to you will stay with him for a long, long time.

 

[SallyIsHere]

Same Boat

We are all in the same boat. We have all been so repressed by our parents, friends and religions. There was a time when I could hardly say anything at all during sex. Slowly I began to try to be more verbal. Now I can't imagine having sex without talking and sharing my arousal and excitement. I LOVE talking dirty!!!
Keep trying Mona. You will get there.

Sally

 

[HoldenMcCrank]

verbalize

think about the non verbal comunication that you give your b/f. and try to verbalize them examples - faster, harder, right there. Stuff like that is great and there is always the postative statements like - Yes, Oh yeah, more, Oh god, that feels so good.

mix these together with the others and you have a nice starting point.

Another suggestion that I have is for you to sit down with your b/f and make a list of words and phrases that he likes and then you tell him if you are comfortable with them or not. You may want to use some form of "talk" before you get into bed. Such as if you feel that your b/f is hard when give you a hug Say to him " I love that i can make you hard" Alot of this is obvisous stuff but never gets verbalized, so just say it. Good luck and let us know how you are doing every once in a while.

HMC

 

[huskie]

I sometimes wish I could plug a mic into my head so I wouldn't have to try and get the words out of my mouth. I constantly think really dirty stuff but saying it out loud is very hard.
I guess your parents really do screw you up don't they? I had a very 'nice' upbringing and I was 22 before I could swear comfortably in front of relatives or my parents!
I still don't feel comfortable using sexual swear words. Not because it is bad or naughty but becuase I grew up thinking that people who used words like fuck, bitch, cunt etc were ignorant, trashy and loutish!
Me and my brother were very 'well spoken' children but it does make it difficult to let loose now!!

MRS. Huskie!!!!!! is that you?!?!?! How did you find this board??? How did my WIFE get on this board??? Damn it!!

j.k.

 

[Monazwx]

I can't wait for this weekend to get started!

These are so many great suggestions, I can't wait for my b/f to get here!

You're right about the upbringing Petrel. I grew up in a super-strict family, (try a priest, a catechist and a deacon!). My parents feel weird when I try to talk to them about sex, so I usually don't bother unless they ask. So, practically any sex word to them is a dirty word. They don't even curse!

When I started dating my b/f, I couldn't even discuss sex without it sounding like national geographic! But we were talking and he says that he would like it if I stated the obvious. It lets him know that things are moving along just right.

Like I said, can't wait til tonight. Thanks!