my friends slept to gether

[firesflair]

Over easter holidays I found out that my two friends (lets call him M and her F) slept together....or as one of them told me 'fucked' which probably describes the affair best. I was told a lot of details about it to, as F was a little unsure of things, and needed some one to talk to. the thing is, they have agreed to be friends with benefits. and she wasn't supposed to tell anyone. and half the time I think about it I start laughing (not because it's funny, it's hard to put it into words, but it's like holy shit I cannot believe it. yet I do. and because I know how bad it was).
M happens to live in a different town, so I don't see him that often. but any tips on hot to stop myself from laughing. and on how to act like I don't know.
also my friend claimed it was bad, lasted like two minutes, with like almost no for play. she's also not wanting too much intimacy in for play or anything. so do you guys have any advice on that. (I've already given her what advice I know...but I've only limited book/second hand knowledge on sex)

 

[SweetErika]

How old are you, M, and F?

 

[Experiencedguy]

Without knowing anything, you have been placed in the middle of a lose-lose situation. If they are your friends, the last thing you should discuss is their 'fucking', especially to give advice or opinions. She needs to talk to someone else. It could be her 'other' best friend', that is not familiar with M, but either way, M will find out, and your friendship with both will be seriously altered (if not destroyed) in the future. You need to gracefully bow out, now.

 

[Vixandra]

I'd tell her if the first time wasn't good, why bother trying again if they're just friends with benefits? Bad sex is worse than no sex.

As for not laughing at "M," well I'm not sure what to tell you. I get a lot of sexual confidences from my friends and it can be difficult not to let on what I know.

 

[BongoGal]

F had 'bad' sex with M, and then F chooses to become a FWB with M? Why? Does she want more 'bad' sex? Does she expect it to get better?

Something about this isn't right.

 

[firesflair]

ya, I know what you guys are saying. she just figures it'll get better. especailly if he can last longer (he lasted like 2 minutes from what F told me).
I don't think she expects to get together with him though, I think it's more like she just wants to do something other then her BOBs. (both of them have been single for almost a year)

 

[firesflair]

How old are you, M, and F?

we are in our early 20's

 

[SweetErika]

ya, I know what you guys are saying. she just figures it'll get better. especailly if he can last longer (he lasted like 2 minutes from what F told me).
I don't think she expects to get together with him though, I think it's more like she just wants to do something other then her BOBs. (both of them have been single for almost a year)

It's unlikely to get better if neither of them like foreplay. Have you asked her why she doesn't want foreplay? After all, that's the bulk of sex, and very, very few women orgasm via penetration alone. So if you have a guy who gets really excited and a girl who doesn't like foreplay, how could they possibly have great sex on a regular basis?

I'd suggest referring her to this forum. Tell her about The Blank Manual sticky (at the top of the main How To forum page) and encourage her to ask any questions she has here. At least she'll be getting (usually incredibly) accurate info from people who typically have a ton of experience.

And what are "BOBs," exactly? I'm totally unfamiliar with that term, so I can decipher that part of your post.

 

[firesflair]

BOBs/bobs -battery operated boyfriends dildos/vibrators.

and she doesn't want most of the stuff I've suggested for foreplay, because she doesn't want things to get too intimate with him. this is, as far as she's told me, at least her (maybe even his) first foray into casual sex.

 

[a75]

On one hand, you are a good friend of M and F, thus it makes sense for you to be an "open ear", if one of them wants to talk about it. On the other hand, I really don't understand why you should care so actively about what 's happened (or still happens) between them. Listen to their stories, express your personal opinion (of one asks for it), but don't go further. Don't become their sexual advisor and don't try to intervene; after all they 're both adults and should define their sexual life themselves.

P/S (Forgive me if I 'm wrong): Are you perhaps the same person with F?

 

[subwannabe]

What's wrong with laughing?

 

[firesflair]

On one hand, you are a good friend of M and F, thus it makes sense for you to be an "open ear", if one of them wants to talk about it. On the other hand, I really don't understand why you should care so actively about what 's happened (or still happens) between them. Listen to their stories, express your personal opinion (of one asks for it), but don't go further. Don't become their sexual advisor and don't try to intervene; after all they 're both adults and should define their sexual life themselves.

P/S (Forgive me if I 'm wrong): Are you perhaps the same person with F?

do you mean am I the same person as F? nope I'm not. otherwise I don't comprehend what you are asking with that sentence.

It's not like I'm going to go actively seeking details about what happens, but since she doesn't have anyone else she can talk to about it (even if other people find out, she doesn't have a lot of friends.). and I didn't actively seek out what I know either, she just spilled the beans and told me what little there was to tell. I did make a few suggestions (more foreplay) but otherwise didn't delve or ask many questions.
I figure that it's going to come up again. and I figured (When I asked for the advice in the second part) that when that happened, and if it was still bad, then maybe I could have something to suggest, not because I wanna become their "sexual adviser" but because I hate it when I have nothing helpful to suggest .

 

[firesflair]

What's wrong with laughing?

well nothing, except M doesn't know that I know, F wasn't supposed to tell. and if I think about it around M I might slip out and laugh at some random time. and I might forget to lie if asked why I'm laughing.