Men: Hiding the... bulge

BeachBum69

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Apr 1, 2005
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24
This is a pretty embarrassing question but I'm being forced to ask it. I am a long time lurker, infrequent poster but I know this is a great community and felt that I might be able to get some good responses here, so here it goes.

I am a 24 year old male, not skinny but not particularly out of shape. I'm a "grower" not a "shower" so when I am flaccid it's nothing particularly special. The result, though, is that my.. entire area... appears as one big lump when I wear dress pants. It sticks out a lot and I get pretty embarrassed about it. It looks kind of ridiculous when I'm just standing around not aroused at all and it looks like I snuck an orange into the crotch of my pants.

Does anyone else deal with this or have any ideas on how to help flatten this area out? The only decent answer I got from Google was to wear tighter underwear. Is this something that SHOULD be addressed or am I just overreacting? Do people usually notice? I am standing up at a wedding in a couple of weeks and just don't like the idea of looking this way.


Thank you all in advance!
 
Does anyone else deal with this or have any ideas on how to help flatten this area out? The only decent answer I got from Google was to wear tighter underwear. Is this something that SHOULD be addressed or am I just overreacting? Do people usually notice? I am standing up at a wedding in a couple of weeks and just don't like the idea of looking this way.

Some people might notice, but honestly, most women aren't looking at your package. They're more likely to look at your chest, face, or butt.

Tight underwear might get seriously uncomfortable. I suggest wearing flat-front pants in a "relaxed" fit, don't wear anything tight or fitted in the thigh/crotch area, and you'll be fine.
 
I might not understand the question, but it seems you can just roll with looser fitting pants. I can't really picture an orange in someone's pants. Most guys tuck it right or left down the leg if they have to wear tighter dress pants. Yeah, I'm trying to figure out what the problem is. If your package is smaller or larger and you want to mitigate bulge, looser fitting pants, longer crotch is the ticket. Sometimes it's fun walking around with a noticeable bulge in the workplace, not a hard on, just to let people know you have genitalia. I'm confused.
 
It seems to me that what his problem is, is that he has a very small package unaroused, so it basically is mostly balls. ;) And therefore, can't tuck.

I think you're overreacting, though. Just wear pants with a looser fit around the crotch rather than something form fitted. Tight underwear sounds terribly uncomfortable.
 
Thanks for the quick responses.

Noira pretty much nailed it where my actual penis is not too big (when flaccid) so it sticks out. I can't tuck.

I have started wearing "flat front" pants and those seem to help a little but do not completely mask it. This problem is most prevalent in loose fitting pants, like the dress pants. Tight material is uncomfortable but loose material is the worst because it just lays on top of everything.
 
Thanks for the quick responses.

Noira pretty much nailed it where my actual penis is not too big (when flaccid) so it sticks out. I can't tuck.

I have started wearing "flat front" pants and those seem to help a little but do not completely mask it. This problem is most prevalent in loose fitting pants, like the dress pants. Tight material is uncomfortable but loose material is the worst because it just lays on top of everything.

A longer jacket that covers your groin area is what you need, then.

Really, thought, trust...you're overreacting. No one is looking at your crotch, sweetie. I promise.
 
I look at everyone's crotch, men and women. But that's because I'm a curious pervert.
 
All right, then the best solution is to wear a hideous, gaudy tie or hat and no one will take a look at your groin even once, I promise! :D

A jacket will obviously provide the best coverage, but I think wearing looser pants should be sufficient for all but the worst of perverts peeking. We all see our faults as worse than they truly are!
 
I look at everyone's crotch, men and women. But that's because I'm a curious pervert.

When I have this problem, I just smile and wink.

I have never understood why some men are embarrassed by an erection.
 
When I have this problem, I just smile and wink.

I have never understood why some men are embarrassed by an erection.

The thing is, this guy's not even talking about erection. He thinks his normal flaccid bulge is a prob. I'd feel self-conscious if the front of my pants were flat. Dudes are supposed to have some sort of bulge if they're wearing slacks. Maybe he needs to post a pic of his orange-shaped bulge so we can figure out if it really needs remedying.
 
When you stand up in the wedding, hold your left first in your right hand in front of you at a "relaxed" height, which is probably just above your junk. Any odd shapes people may or may not see will be attributed to the shadow created by your hands.

In fact, in most weddings I've been in, they've had the guys hold their hands like this.

Good luck!
 
You might try a thicker form of boxer or a man's thong to try to keep things subdued.

The thong helps keep everything in place in a smooth line and if its a thicker material like a cotton plaid, it will reduce any bumpyness.

Or you could try having custom fitted pants made for you by a tailor. But that can be expensive.
 
Looser fitting pants
Black pants
Tighter underwear
Shirts that cover your junk up (not tucked in of course)
 
Having properly fitted, not too tight pants is important. If your standing up at a wedding you should have a suit jacket or sport coat on so it wont be a problem really.

Boxer briefs, pretty much what I always have to wear with dress pants.

And, if your really self conscious you could get some compression shorts.
 
To add to my previous post: step back and think for a second - who's going to be looking at you for more than a minute or two? After the groom, groomsmen, and bridesmaids walk down the aisle, everyone will be looking at the bride and then the bride and groom.

Don't fret.
 
It doesnt matter about your bulge. Women know if you are not confident about your cock. Who cares. If women notice and give you shit about it like "like oh my gawd, your pants are too tight." tell them "I could of told you your breasts cling to your outfit, but I kept that to myself."

If you see a woman, look at your bulge, use one of your hands to do a "look up" signal with your hand, as if to say "look at my eyes, not my cock", and they will be embarrassed at being caught checking you out. You also score bonus points for catching her checking you out, and then you can approach her with a "I seen you checking me out, and I thought I'd say hi"
 
Personally, I would love for a woman to check out my bulge. Seems like it would be a good sign that she might want some of that.
 
Thanks for all of the suggestions! I really do appreciate it. I am going to go the boxer-brief route and just let it be what it is. I mean, at least I feel better about the idea now and am not so paranoid that people will notice.

You guys are great.
 
Theres a boxer- brief in target that has a frim extra layer in the "frontal" region for guys like you. your not alone we sell them all the time. hope the wedding goes well man.
 
I'm wondering where you buy your pants. I'm just asking because pants are one of those clothing items where buying higher quality (yes, usually meaning more expensive) makes a huge difference in fit. If you don't normally buy at a nice-ish sort of clothing store, you may want to go in and try on some pants at a Banana Republic or some place similar. If it doesn't look like an improvement, you don't have to buy them!

I will also echo the others who said it's not that big a deal. I think I actually read a thread on here once where we discussed if women look at guy's crotches, and the consensus is no. I'm not sure why that is. I don't even look at my boyfriend's crotch and I'm allowed to. I guess that's just not how I get my jollies when I look at a man's body. I'm much more likely to check out his arms or his butt :)
 
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