Men are eyes, Women are ears?

[it_matters]

Some recent psychobabble has it that biologically and mentally, men's libido gets riled up mostly with visuals, while women's libido is turned on through the subtler senses of touch, hearing, smell. The proof they claim includes a bizillion porn magazines -- now being replaced by two bizillion internet porn sites... all aimed mostly at the males, though admittedly enjoyed to some extent by the females as well.

So, ok. We realize we have a somewhat unrepresentative cross-section of the planet here in the Playground. Still, I'd like to hear it from you unique, internet-browsing, webcam-using, phone-sex dialing Literoticans: what do you believe is the truth about visual media and getting hot?

Answer the poll, then answer the question: is visual stimulus big in your sexual book? How does it compare to other ways you get drawn in? What is the first sense that gets you going? What is the last sense that hangs on afterwards?

 

[it_matters]

Have to admit it...

I am a good candidate to support the Psychobabble Report. Though of course it isn't that simple -- but there is something to be said for a woman calling to the man. A lot to be said for it, and no, I don't think it is all her work... and yes, it depends on what kind of stuff is being sent out in that mating dance.

Anyway, I love what an image can tell, what a body can tell from a distance, love spiraling in to the center, spinning around that fantasy, while the whole body and all the senses begin to tingle in anticipation -- how warm is that, what will that taste like under a kiss, how do those muscles move, what is the dance going to be like?

Some of my favorite fantasies have a bit of mirror or reflection in them, to tease that visual sense. And some of you (female) Literoticans make me take a very very deep breath with your AVs. I think the usual phrase, once I start breathing again, is holy shit

 

[Denae]

I voted that pics are all right, but....

As I began to type this, I erased and edited, and now I feel like I don't want to share what I find erotic with everyone. Then I realize that is a cop out. A compromise is in order. Without revealing everything inside my head, this is what I will say in this forum.

Of course, almost everyone is drawn to someone visually at first. Be it a grin or a toothy smile, a fine ass encased in jeans, a set of well-groomed fingernails, or the hair at his wrist. Then we break it down, peel away the layers and are attracted to other parts of our partner.

I've also been drawn to a man based on his voice alone. He was a customer of our company and he called virtually every day. I knew I had to meet the man behind the voice and I did. We had a few dates, but nothing came of it and I have no regrets.

What will always generate heat with me, is seeing the way that he looks at me.

 

[Missingmeds]

Answer the poll, then answer the question: is visual stimulus big in your sexual book? How does it compare to other ways you get drawn in? What is the first sense that gets you going? What is the last sense that hangs on afterwards?

Visual stimulus is only big in my book once I am in bed with a partner. It doesn't compare to anything. My sense of intelligence, and his ability to stimulate my brain is the biggest turn on for me. And my sense of intelligence is the last thing that hangs on as well.

 

[Denae]

Answer the poll, then answer the question: is visual stimulus big in your sexual book? How does it compare to other ways you get drawn in? What is the first sense that gets you going? What is the last sense that hangs on afterwards?

Visual stimulus is only big in my book once I am in bed with a partner. It doesn't compare to anything. My sense of intelligence, and his ability to stimulate my brain is the biggest turn on for me. And my sense of intelligence is the last thing that hangs on as well.

Adding my two cents: the sexiest organ a man has is his brain.

 

[it_matters]

... and then, visual stimulus when you're sitting at the computer at looking (for example) at D's new AV (-distraction-) is entirely different from sitting in a restaurant and playing with eyes and words and maybe feet under the table.

I didn't mean the question to be simple, like "are we animals or are we sublime", though it is hard to write it without sounding that way. Maybe a good question is: what do you see that moves you, and how does seeing feed your libido (if at all)?

man, this touch-typing practice is busting my butt. I can't think this slow, how frustrating!

 

[Denae]

Here's hoping that I'm on the right track here. You want to know what visually stimulates a woman?

Lips like LL Cool J (I think my whole face would be lost in his lips for a week)
or my favorite: Christopher Meloni (I could watch that man's mouth move for hours).

Christopher Meloni's receding hairline (I know, even my friends are surprised, but his type of receding hairline gets my attention on any male who shares it).

Ass and thighs encased inside a just-right fitting pair of jeans.

A medium-sized aerola...delectable

The trail to glory...mmmhmm.

All of that is wasted without a glint in the eyes and a sincere smile. And that smile-it doesn't have to be an orthodontist's creation, in fact I kind of like imperfections.

 

[BadBombshellBabe]

i seem to be in the minority of the female population...but visual stuff is wildly erotic to me. i'm not referring to pictures primarily intended for women...**yawn**.

adult material that is directed at men, consistently gets my motor running. the naughtier, the better. incidentally, i'm 100% hetero.

of course there are so many other senses involved in becoming aroused when you're in the company of someone with whom chemistry exists...traits like confidence and assertiveness really do it for me.

 

[it_matters]

Here's hoping that I'm on the right track here. You want to know what visually stimulates a woman?

Lips like LL Cool J (I think my whole face would be lost in his lips for a week)
or my favorite: Christopher Meloni (I could watch that man's mouth move for hours).

Christopher Meloni's receding hairline (I know, even my friends are surprised, but his type of receding hairline gets my attention on any male who shares it).

Ass and thighs encased inside a just-right fitting pair of jeans.

A medium-sized aerola...delectable

The trail to glory...mmmhmm.

All of that is wasted without a glint in the eyes and a sincere smile. And that smile-it doesn't have to be an orthodontist's creation, in fact I kind of like imperfections.

Oh yeah, I did read this... and being acultural as I am, I did google MR LL and Mr. Christopher. LL's got a bit more going for him than just the lips, heh heh.

And Levi Strauss or whoever the hell invented blue jeans was either a genius of sensuality, or is as surprised as the rest of us how sexy his invention turned out to be. Specially thos button-down-the-fronts, too much fun to play with

 

[rainyguy]

You know I've heard that bit about what turn men and women on.

And I've always found it interesting because for me, as a man, I am certainly visual but it's not what truly drives me. If you want me to be entirely honest I will.

The voice/smell and brain or intellect of a woman is really what does it for me. Let me have a conversation with a woman, let me spend some time in close physical proximity, let me engage her brain. That will tell me everything I want to know.

Yes, seeing a physically attractive woman will turn my head and that's it.

but being around a woman who has a certain smell, a certain type of voice and a brain geared in the proper way and I'm hers! lol if shed have me.

 

[~Coquette~]

I am visual...but not in your face porn visual...I am weird...I will watch a show..let's say Nip Tuck....and one of the characters are having sex....it's sooooo hot to me....it's like I have to imagine the rest and it's exciting....porn used to do it for me...but now I am bored with it...I see it and go ...blah....I am a strange little girl I suppose.....

 

[Cathleen]

I'm a mixture I suppose but far more attracted to the mind and soul. I've needed glasses since I was about ten years old and it wasn't until high school/college that I should have been wearing them full time - should have been being the key.

Since I couldn't see well without them and didn't wear them full time the visual of a man was lost on me; I'm not sure it was ever much in my book. I'm drawn to the mind, the way he handles himself and those around him. Of course that is what attracts me now, at this point in my life. It's difficult for me to remember what was the draw twenty or ten years ago - sort of like you don't remember life before you have a child. I'm just entirely different in my thinking, understanding and acceptance now.

 

[lustyem]

women are ears?

I myself find reading erotic stories more influencing than looking.
When I read the story is in my mind and im thinking about it , as I read I find i am imagining myself in it.
Also a mans scent and voice can be so so arousing to me .

 

[it_matters]

I'm drawn to the mind, the way he handles himself and those around him. Of course that is what attracts me now, at this point in my life. It's difficult for me to remember what was the draw twenty or ten years ago - sort of like you don't remember life before you have a child. I'm just entirely different in my thinking, understanding and acceptance now.

As you mention this, C, a clear memory from the sixth grade rushed into me: I am in the classroom with Mr. Hill and Mr. Budde -- the math classroom -- where we are in the final stages of planning a class weekend, a cabin retreat up north, near the headwaters of a famous river. Sixth grade, what is that -- twelve years old? Or so.

I walk up to Mr. Budde and ask a question. As he begins to reply, I feel someone else walk up to my right, waiting to ask another question... and suddenly this scent which was not a scent filled my lungs -- no, it filled my entire body. It got behind my eyes and pulled them backwards, and plugged up my ears, I couldn't hear my teacher's words anymore. It was a girl from my class who -- looking back -- was certainly blossoming sexually... so young for girls, so much later for boys. Not a bad thing.

Anyway, while it would take me a few more years for my own body to get going, it already knew what pheromones were. Holy shit, I was in a rip tide being hauled out to sea. I opened my nostrils wide and just breathed in that water, drowning in her.

I didn't even see her until later -- and by then of course she could have been an ogre-girl and it wouldn't have mattered, because my body had seen her. Wow.

Sense of smell is not so strong as it was then -- not as fresh a body I guess. But still available I think. That's why the little daydream I posted on the Daydreamer's thread is so strong for me -- to take away the visual completely, and see with the other senses, how powerful.

 

[gisella]

mmmmm. a man without brains is just that...for me intelligence is a big percentage of it...of course a sensual guy has to have brains...but for me there is nothing more exciting than the sensual game playing...seeing a guy across the room your eyes meet and than the turning on of each other with simple eye contact...I don't know something to be said about it...

Of course nice strips done by a guy that i am interested in make my day just right...

 

[Missingmeds]

As a tactile learner, it is more the hands on approach with the eyes on the real subject....that does it for me....a nice smile....a good ass, in a pair of those just right fitting jeans...but it all has to come together with a brain and someone that I can actually touch.

 

[Inna]

Am far more turned on by what a guy tells me or how he smells or if he shows consideration. The visual can actually be a turn off. Hate it when a guy pms me and offers to show me his dick without any kind of getting to know you conversation.

 

[it_matters]

Am far more turned on by what a guy tells me or how he smells or if he shows consideration. The visual can actually be a turn off. Hate it when a guy pms me and offers to show me his dick without any kind of getting to know you conversation.

Yuck, what's there to like...? A body is worth nothing if there's nothing in there to back it up. And visual without subtlety is like getting slapped. A rape of the eyes, really.

But how he smells, eh? Are you talking cologne, and if so, what scents are best?

 

[it_matters]

As a tactile learner, it is more the hands on approach with the eyes on the real subject....that does it for me....a nice smile....a good ass, in a pair of those just right fitting jeans...but it all has to come together with a brain and someone that I can actually touch.

Man, there are those jeans again! I'm telling you, the guy made fabric so it wouldn't wear out, made it for factory workers and farm hands. But the first pair he put on, he could just feel all the women watching his ass... and he says to himself, Levi, he says, you have just made your fortune, in more ways than one. And he smiled a little smile.

Just for you ladies, the male lead in my story in progress is going to show up in the perfect pair of jeans.... shameless opportunist that I am.

 

[WantonWitch]

Ok, I go for the tall type, I can't help it, I'm sorry I like 'em tall, but then again, if you can make me laugh then you can put on inches without even trying. Have a sense of humour, make your aim in life to keep me smiling and baby I will move the world for you.

 

[gisella]

Am far more turned on by what a guy tells me or how he smells or if he shows consideration. The visual can actually be a turn off. Hate it when a guy pms me and offers to show me his dick without any kind of getting to know you conversation.

I hate that to Inna...they actually think they are all that...

 

[Sulk]

I am a woman, and pics are all right, but I prefer...

A well crafted mind fuck.

 

[it_matters]

I am a woman, and pics are all right, but I prefer...

A well crafted mind fuck.

Aha, that's where the mind and the body really start to crank up the volume. Burn holes simultaneously in the retina and in the chest... they say it's the heart, but actually it's right in mid-chest, where it has equal access to the flow of blood to your nether regions (usually removing it from your brain to do so) and to the movement of air to your lungs.

BTW, women definitely know the power of images, judging by how they employ them. Note Sulk's current AV... colors yes, curve and contour of the breast (sigh), at that tiny golden bead at the hollow of the throat (gasp!). Mind fucks CAN be visual.

 

[gisella]

I am a woman, and pics are all right, but I prefer...

A well crafted mind fuck.

HI sulk long time no see hon...How are u sweetie? Hope your good... Have a wonderfull weekend...

 

[Sulk]

I know, I'm off topic, but....

HI sulk long time no see hon...How are u sweetie? Hope your good... Have a wonderfull weekend...

{{{{Gisella}}}}, you sex kitten!
I'm good, if sexually starved this week... Hoping you and your gorgeous Slut are well and happy!