Maintaining Motivation and Accountability

[LoganLee]

I’m passionate about my writing and crafting stories - so much so that I cannot simply just stop - but I’m plagued by a persistent struggle to maintain my motivation and hold myself accountable despite my eagerness and frustration to finish the story.

I’m curious to know if anyone else experiences similar struggles. If so, I’d love to hear about how you’ve overcome them or if anyone uses something like an accountability buddy and how they might have found or even built trust with them.

 

[alohadave]

I’m plagued by a persistent struggle to maintain my motivation

Motivation gets you going today, discipline gets you going every other day.

If you want to write consistently, you need to do it consistently. Just like how I often don't feel like going to work, but I like getting paid, I go to work even when I don't feel like it.

 

[pink_silk_glove]

People hate hearing this answer but ... it's the answer: roll up your sleeves and get to work. You;re a writer. It's what you do.

Yes there are days when I find it difficult to write. Sometimes I take a day or two off, but eventually, I have to push through. Usually my writer's block problems are more bottleneck of ideas rather than lack of ideas. When this happens, I just have to sort the ideas out, jotting notes as quickly as I can get them out of my head to clear the logjam and get things flowing again.

 

[LoganLee]

Thank you both for these. I do agree and don’t dislike hearing them. However, I don’t think I have explained myself well.

Do you share your WIPs with anyone as your building them? For example, bounce ideas of friends or peers or gauge reception - or are you alone in writing and wait until it’s released?

Whilst I have a great circle of friends, I am very much alone in my writing and development of the stories. I feel this might be suffocating my motivation. It certainly leaves me with a sense of loneliness.

 

[SimonDoom]

I struggle all the time with discipline and consistency in my writing schedule. I don't let myself feel too bad about it, however, because I don't get paid to do it. It's just a fun hobby. It's not work. I have no obligation to do it.

I understand the comment about loneliness. I am a moderately introverted person, and it's possible that spending as much time as I do writing (and hanging out here) takes time away from socializing. But while the process of writing can be tedious or arduous sometimes, I always enjoy the results. I get a great deal of satisfaction from "having written." On the whole, I think writing suits my personality well.

 

[LoganLee]

I struggle all the time with discipline and consistency in my writing schedule. I don't let myself feel too bad about it, however, because I don't get paid to do it. It's just a fun hobby. It's not work. I have no obligation to do it.

I understand the comment about loneliness. I am a moderately introverted person, and it's possible that spending as much time as I do writing (and hanging out here) takes time away from socializing. But while the process of writing can be tedious or arduous sometimes, I always enjoy the results. I get a great deal of satisfaction from "having written." On the whole, I think writing suits my personality well.

This is quite reassuring to hear, whilst I knew I would not be alone in the fact.

I do not hang out here enough to be honest. I read and follow a lot, but I am not very good with socialisation wether it be physical or virtual. It might help reduce some of the feeling if I can overcome that.

 

[SimonDoom]

I do not hang out here enough to be honest. I read and follow a lot, but I am not very good with socialisation wether it be physical or virtual. It might help reduce some of the feeling if I can overcome that.

Give it a try. The way I see it, it's "cost-free" socialization, even for a shy person. We're all pseudonymous. You can wear whatever mask you want to while "getting to know" people here.

This place can be high-schoolish and annoying at times, but there are a lot of intelligent people here from varying and interesting backgrounds, and we all share an interest in erotica, which is an interesting thing to have a common interest in. I've long since gotten used to it, but it strikes me as curious at times how much I enjoy communicating with others about my fantasies about people fucking each other (and nobody bats an eye at my use of the word "fucking"). Face it, it's fun to chat about.

 

[LoganLee]

Give it a try. The way I see it, it's "cost-free" socialization, even for a shy person. We're all pseudonymous. You can wear whatever mask you want to while "getting to know" people here.

This place can be high-schoolish and annoying at times, but there are a lot of intelligent people here from varying and interesting backgrounds, and we all share an interest in erotica, which is an interesting thing to have a common interest in. I've long since gotten used to it, but it strikes me as curious at times how much I enjoy communicating with others about my fantasies about people fucking each other (and nobody bats an eye at my use of the word "fucking"). Face it, it's fun to chat about.

I love chatting about it, so it would be nice to have somewhere to do it without feeling alien or getting sheepish looks.

What about whilst writing? Do you have people you have made contact with that you bounce or chat about your WIP’s to help you along?

 

[SimonDoom]

What about whilst writing? Do you have people you have made contact with that you bounce or chat about your WIP’s to help you along?

Not much. I chat here about my stories sometimes after they are published, but I almost never involve other writers in the process. Nobody helps me with proofreading (although I certainly would profit from it). I've only used a beta reader once.

A few people in the "real world" know I write erotic stories, but they don't know where, they don't know my pseudonym, and as far as I know none of them have actually read my stories.

So I'm pretty much on my own. That's OK with me.

 

[pink_silk_glove]

Thank you both for these. I do agree and don’t dislike hearing them. However, I don’t think I have explained myself well.

Well, I've had a few people get really fucking angry at me for saying that around here before.

Do you share your WIPs with anyone as your building them? For example, bounce ideas of friends or peers or gauge reception - or are you alone in writing and wait until it’s released?

Yes, I have 2 or 3 friends that I use as beta readers. I usually feed them a chapter at a time. They are invaluable.

But while the process of writing can be tedious or arduous sometimes, I always enjoy the results. I get a great deal of satisfaction from "having written."

This is very very important. Many people claim to love writing, but when inspiration bogs down they stop writing and then complain that they can't get anything written. We see threads in here every month saying essentially this exact thing. What is likely really going on is that these people like being read but don't want to put in the effort to keep being read. So they don't really love writing so much as they love the attention of being read and being told how good they are. Some days writing is pure joy. These days are easy. Other days it's frustrating drudgery. On these days the best thing to do is to remind yourself that getting it done right and published IS SO WORTH IT! That makes it easier to get to work.

 

[LoganLee]

A few people in the "real world" know I write erotic stories, but they don't know where, they don't know my pseudonym, and as far as I know none of them have actually read my stories.

I can relate here. I think this + the missing community is what has left me finding things difficult.

 

[SimonDoom]

This is very very important. Many people claim to love writing, but when inspiration bogs down they stop writing and then complain that they can't get anything written. We see threads in here every month saying essentially this exact thing. What is likely really going on is that these people like being read but don't want to put in the effort to keep being read. So they don't really love writing so much as they love the attention of being read and being told how good they are. Some days writing is pure joy. These days are easy. Other days it's frustrating drudgery. On these days the best thing to do is to remind yourself that getting it done right and published IS SO WORTH IT! That makes it easier to get to work.

You might be correct that some people do it for the love of the crowd, but that's not how it is for me. I enjoy having my story written and published, quite apart from the response I get. I like, after it's published, to open it up, and to scan the words, and to think "I wrote that." It's not perfect, but it's mine, and I'm proud of it. It's enormously satisfying to see my story online.

Some of the stories that I have enjoyed the most "having written" are the ones that get the lowest scores or fewest views. Those are some of my most unusual and creative stories, and I enjoy knowing that my imagination went in a weird direction. But I make no bones about the fact that I also enjoy knowing that some of my stories have been read and liked by many readers.

I strongly believe one doesn't have to choose. One can write many different kinds of stories with different motives and different creative purposes. That's how I personally approach it, and I find it maximizes my satisfaction to do it that way.

 

[LoganLee]

Yes, I have 2 or 3 friends that I use as beta readers. I usually feed them a chapter at a time. They are invaluable.

Are they friends you have made through here or “real world”? Curiosity mostly as I think that sort of engagement could really help but not sure where to start (other than being more present as SimonDoom has suggested).

 

[pink_silk_glove]

You might be correct that some people do it for the love of the crowd, but that's not how it is for me.

Well, I know that you are not one of those of course.

I strongly believe one doesn't have to choose. One can write many different kinds of stories with different motives and different creative purposes. That's how I personally approach it, and I find it maximizes my satisfaction to do it that way.

It is a spectrum. At one end a writer writes from his heart and at the other he writes from his ego. The heart loves to tell the story, the ego writes for the applause, and factors that applause against the effort put in to gain said applause. One can write 100% heart, 100% ego, 50/50 or anywhere in between, but if one believes that he can write 100% from the heart and a little ego too, he is mistaken, because the motivation is a spectrum. It's like mixing hot and cold tap water. If you put both on full, you only get lukewarm. if you put the hot on full and add a little cold, it won't be as hot as pure hot, so if you try to write 100% heart pure and then add a little ego it will no longer be heart pure. There is nothing wrong with that but one will find it less satisfying in the long run, and also the quality of writing will likely be (a little or a lot) inferior.

I do totally agree that each story can and does have a different motivation.

 

[SimonDoom]

It is a spectrum. At one end a writer writes from his heart and at the other he writes from his ego. The heart loves to tell the story, the ego writes for the applause, and factors that applause against the effort put in to gain said applause. One can write 100% heart, 100% ego, 50/50 or anywhere in between, but if one believes that he can write 100% from the heart and a little ego too, he is mistaken, because the motivation is a spectrum. It's like mixing hot and cold tap water. If you put both on full, you only get lukewarm. if you put the hot on full and add a little cold, it won't be as hot as pure hot, so if you try to write 100% heart pure and then add a little ego it will no longer be heart pure. There is nothing wrong with that but one will find it less satisfying in the long run, and also the quality of writing will likely be (a little or a lot) inferior.

I do totally agree that each story can and does have a different motivation.

I understand this perspective, but don't quite agree with it. I emphasize "quite." I don't entirely disagree.

I take an unromantic approach to the creative process. I don't really believe in the head and the heart stuff. I agree that there is such a thing as writing purely to hew to a perceived artistic standard, and this can be very different from writing entirely with a mind to achieve success with a lot of readers (pandering), but I also believe one can achieve "high art" while minding the bottom line. Many, many esteemed authors over the years have, in fact, done this. I think Shakespeare did this. Dickens. Twain.

I'd offer McMurtry's Lonesome Dove as an example. It's a crowd-pleasing melodramatic yarn, but it's so well done that I think it achieves the status of "high art" and richly deserved its Pulitzer Prize. The melodrama and art exist in perfect equipoise, and the result is a great book.

What we do here is mostly "genre" fiction. We recycle themes that, let's face it, turn people on, because that's the whole point of erotica. But it can be done well and not well. My concept of writing "well" is to write mindfully and with good craftsmanship rather than to write "from the heart."

 

[Nynah]

Thank you both for these. I do agree and don’t dislike hearing them. However, I don’t think I have explained myself well.

Do you share your WIPs with anyone as your building them? For example, bounce ideas of friends or peers or gauge reception - or are you alone in writing and wait until it’s released?

Whilst I have a great circle of friends, I am very much alone in my writing and development of the stories. I feel this might be suffocating my motivation. It certainly leaves me with a sense of loneliness.

To me, it sounds like you are looking to find peers who engage in this specific content to bounce ideas off of and your circle of friends is not the forum for that, so you feel isolated when you write for this hobby. If that's the case, there are resources here to ask for editors/beta readers (Editor Portal: https://www.literotica.com/editors/ & Editor's Forum). In the interests of full disclosure, I have never used them myself but they do exist and I have seen other writers seemingly find some measure of success with them but I can't guarantee that that is the norm.

If your motivation to write and develop your stories is tied so intrinsically to being able to talk to other people about it, then this isn't a bad place to start. You might have to put in some legwork to finding editors/readers that you vibe with but this is at least the peer group most appropriate for the content you want to produce. Hoping that you find something that works for you!

 

[pink_silk_glove]

I understand this perspective, but don't quite agree with it. I emphasize "quite." I don't entirely disagree.

I take an unromantic approach to the creative process. I don't really believe in the head and the heart stuff. I agree that there is such a thing as writing purely to hew to a perceived artistic standard, and this can be very different from writing entirely with a mind to achieve success with a lot of readers (pandering), but I also believe one can achieve "high art" while minding the bottom line. Many, many esteemed authors over the years have, in fact, done this. I think Shakespeare did this. Dickens. Twain.

The reason that you don't quite agree with it is because you are looking at it from the results perspective instead of the motivation perspective. You are effectively saying that the result is a direct correlation to the mindset. Of course something can be created from the ego and actually turn out very well and likewise something can be created from the heart and just not work (there are other factors of course and I'm not going to be foolish enough to pretend to know what they all are), but the correlation is not linearly direct at all. I did mention that work will ultimately be inferior if written from the ego but of course that is generally in the long run. In the long term, writing from the heart is more satisfying and generally of better quality. In fact, those who delve deeper into pandering tend to not improve at all due to the fact that they are trying to write the same thing in different ways to elicit the same applause while writing from the heart always strives to break new ground.

If you look at this from the motivation perspective it makes perfect sense. Writing from the heart always has something new to write about. Writing from the ego keeps trying to please the audience and so it is dependent upon the audience in every way. Obviously even writing from the heart needs an audience but there will always be some sort of audience for something new and inspired. That audience is not so intrinsically required in the process as it is for ego driven writing which actually needs that audience even at the inspiration stage before the pen even touches the paper. Heart driven writing only needs to audience upon publication. This is VERY different. We see it here on lit constantly, these epic unending serial writers who are totally jazzed to get 50 faves and a 4.7 on chapter 1, then as the applause dwindles and the scores decline, the chapters become less and less inspired until the writer quits due to LACK OF MOTIVATION and they start a thread in the AH about their lack of motivation (and then bitch out that cunt PSG who tries to show them the truth about why it's not working anymore). Why is that? Because the energy to write was fueled by the applause, hence the LITERAL inspiration to write was for the applause. The writer may not know this (probably because chapter 1 actually was fairly inspired and then the writer was bitten by the addiction of that first applause which started the cycle). The applause goes down, the motivation lacks, the need for greater applause increases, the effort required to sustain the writing increases, the cycle spirals downward, the diminishing returns aren't worth it and the story DIES. It is the addiction spiral, exactly - EXACTLY (no metaphor here) - and all addictions are rooted in the ego because the ego IS the chase for external energy, whereas the heart is the internal energy source. This might be a little too spiritual and unscientific for you but it is the truth.

You mention Shakespeare and Twain and make great points. Both of these writers were staggeringly popular with the masses and have stood the test of generations but I doubt that either of them were pandering much at all. Their stories connected with the public because they strove to make those connections with their art, which is very different from pandering. Take Bob Dylan for instance. I highly doubt that he ever wrote a single pandered note or syllable in his entire body of work (which is massive). He wrote whatever he wanted to write and him alone, yet his songs touched million upon millions because what he was doing was striving to make that connection, again entirely different from (yet easily confused with) wanting approval.

 

[SinclairGroupLLP]

When I first started writing a few months ago, I had a wealth of free time, and a lot of motivation. The words came easy, they just kept flowing. As I walked around, saw things, went to work, talked to people, ideas just hit me. I wrote half a story in my head on a long five hour drive from home to a major east coast city. I finished the first part of my story in a month, and was ready to jump immediately into the second part.

Now I'm in the middle of the second part, trying to finish it, and things aren't coming as easily. The last few days I've had to force myself to sit down and do my 5k words a day that I set as a minimum when I started last month. Thankfully work hasn't been that difficult so far so I've had the time to do it. But yeah, I hear you on the motivation. It also doesn't help that my significant other will read what I write rarely, because of the subject matter, and I don't have a network of folks to talk to about it, so it's really just me pushing myself.

I have to agree with the vets here - this is one of those things where you just have to buckle down, and write. Hell, I'm procrastinating right now, lol.

 

[pink_silk_glove]

5k words a day that I set as a minimum when I started last month.

That might be your problem right there. 5k per day is a FUCKTON. Many prolific famous novelists admit to a 2k per day target.

Personally, 5k is probably my largest day ever. If I can hit 2k in a day I am super stoked. If I can hit 1000 I'm happy. If I can get 500 words I'll take it.

 

[SimonDoom]

That might be your problem right there. 5k per day is a FUCKTON. Many prolific famous novelists admit to a 2k per day target.

Personally, 5k is probably my largest day ever. If I can hit 2k in a day I am super stoked. If I can hit 1000 I'm happy. If I can get 500 words I'll take it.

If I recall, Hemingway said he strived for 500 words per day. So, yeah, 5K is a heck of a lot. If you can write that much and feel good about what you are writing, you are doing great.

I have days where I write as much as 5000 words or more, but that's rare. More often than not, I write nothing. But as I've said, nobody is paying me for this.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

That might be your problem right there. 5k per day is a FUCKTON. Many prolific famous novelists admit to a 2k per day target.

Personally, 5k is probably my largest day ever. If I can hit 2k in a day I am super stoked. If I can hit 1000 I'm happy. If I can get 500 words I'll take it.

I've noted this a few times; Hemingway, arguably one of America's greatest writers, only wrote 500 words a day. I guess the thing is, make those 500 words count.

 

[SinclairGroupLLP]

I'm verbose. Like I said - I started in November, and the word count on the first part of this trilogy, which is complete, is like 218k words. I'm of the old Woodrow Wilson philosophy (if he even said it) - I can talk for an hour right now, but if you want a ten minutes speech, that'll take a week. Something something quantity has a quality all its own. Man, all these quotes I know are attributed to dozens of people and I doubt any of them are right, lol.

I've been following PSG's heart vs. ego thing, and I think she's right about a lot of that, although as someone who writes multi-chapter stuff, my biggest issue with the ratings isn't that they keep going down, it's that I hate getting hit with bad ratings on stuff I think I wrote pretty well. Obviously, if I think it's great and the audience thinks it's shit, then that's on me, but there are times when I scratch my head and I wonder where I fucked up to earn that one star.

The difficulty I find with the heart vs. ego thing is that since this is a free site, and none of us are getting paid, is there some kind of reward other than the likes and subscribes? A good comment or two - I've had some that have made my day - I suppose, but in the end, I guess knowing that I moved a reader to tears, or they're looking forward to the next installment (another thing that helps my motivation, not wanting to let folks down) probably is what keeps me going when I'm in one of those parts I have to push through. If I'm just writing from the heart, why bother with an audience? If it's just ego, I can totally see it being an addiction that burns out when you stop getting the fix.

As you can see, I'm still procrastinating, lol.

 

[oneagainst]

To go back to the OP, the AH is a good place to get feedback, much easier than randomly telling friends you write erotica and asking for their comments on your big finishing scene with the elephants and the chandelier. Almost all the people you know are not going to react well to a request to read that, and it's too hard generally to filter out the ones who might want to help. I generally don't rely on editors because I think I can manage that myself, but getting someone to beta read is often invaluable, especially if you're too close to the text to see the issues. It's quid pro quo - beta read for someone and they beta read for you, and you might click with them or you might not. But, offer and see... some people are not good writers but very good readers and vice versa.

Then, if it's a big deal to get feedback, you can always try with I did in the comments section of the final chapter of Total Female Control - ask for beta readers for the next book in the series. I have obtained *invaluable* feedback from this which has helped immensely in drafting the next story.

As for getting past writer's block and staying motivated, after 1M words, I wrote about the process I used to keep going in Building Wonderland. It's about writing non-linearly within a pre-laid scaffolding so there's always something fun to be tackled. You can jump forward and back, and the bits you get stuck on get whittled down into smaller and smaller patches that are easier to just pick off and bulldoze through.

Anyway, that's how I do it.