Macrophilia and D/s?

[KoPilot]

So I discovered a few years ago that there was a word for my inclination toward size-play and the like; that the idea of being dick-high or knee-high was something of a turn-on, and that there were other people out there like me. (Though very very few, especially since I'm a female macro).

It's not a very "powerful" fetish, I guess you could say, because I don't crave macrophilic imagery all the time, but I think I've begun to understand in recent months that it's a very... deep-seated and influential part of who I am. As a kid I was always fascinated by dynamics between characters that were at least partially defined by differences in size (this extended itself to animal characters when I was young, too). Movies like Gulliver's Travels and Disney's Hercules always caught my attention, and roleplaying sessions with grade school friends always resulted in me assuming the role of someone/something smaller than everyone else.

I think it would be silly to dismiss the D/s undertones of macro/microphilia and all of its offshoot fetishes. Even in the most "vanilla" of fantasy scenarios, there's always the ever-present size difference that, at the very least, results in some mental sense of domination/submission, even if it's completely benign.

In this way I've started to figure out what exactly I identify with, and I think that would be the role of "little", as its called in the world of macros. But for me, that transcends just a projected role for the purpose of sexual fantasy; it's just who I am: lock, stock, and barrel. It's why I'm fascinated by the bdsm world to begin with. I guess if I can't have a lover twice my size, then I want one that wouldn't mind acting like he was, I guess. This also explains why I don't get turned on by the thought of being humiliated, degraded, or treated like property... I crave more "emotional" equality, and far less "physical" equality. Being tied up for me isn't just about being tied up: it's about feeling small, and it's the closest I'll ever get to having a 15 foot boyfriend. (In this life, at least!)

I'm just curious what you all think of this uncommon fetish (okay, so it appears to be far more common among men than women), and how it relates to the bdsm mentality? I've lurked and posted in what few forums there on the subject, and I haven't yet seen any real thought go into it whatsoever, or how the people that seem to "have it worse" than me deal with it in their sex lives. I can't help but wonder if they feel fulfilled or not... and if not, then I guess that's probably how some of them can rack up 30,000 posts on a macrophile imageboard.

Thoughts? Anyone else here of this particular persuasion?

Sorry if my thoughts were a bit jumbled... it usually happens when I write long posts.

 

[KoPilot]

And oh wow, this somehow ended up in the cafe. I don't even remember navigating here. D:

 

[BiBunny]

Not my thing, but I talk to guys with a giantess and/or shrinking fetish on a semi-regular basis. It's not exactly the same as what you describe, but it's in the neighborhood.

As far as fetishes go--and I'm not a fetishist AT ALL--, it's one of the more interesting ones.

 

[KoPilot]

Not my thing, but I talk to guys with a giantess and/or shrinking fetish on a semi-regular basis. It's not exactly the same as what you describe, but it's in the neighborhood.

As far as fetishes go--and I'm not a fetishist AT ALL--, it's one of the more interesting ones.

Yeah, a lot of people like the rampaging types and enjoy a big that's destroying buildings and stepping on people. A lot of others just basically like the idea of super-sized boobs and vaginas that they can crawl on/about/into. They almost always seem to prefer women who are in the several-stories-high range, or even hundreds of feet tall, and I think that when you start getting into those kinds of scales, then objectification of the big is inevitable because intimacy is basically impossible. That's why skyscraper-tall guys never did it for me, hurhur.

I think these differences probably manifest themselves due to the typical differences in male and female wiring.

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

The first guy I was with, wasn't 15 feet tall, but he *was* 6'7" .. a whole foot and a half taller than my 5'1"

If only he'd been dominant, then I might have understood better what you're feeling.

I *can* understand the need to feel smaller, helpless, taken care of though.

I'm curious to hear more too.

 

[KoPilot]

The first guy I was with, wasn't 15 feet tall, but he *was* 6'7" .. a whole foot and a half taller than my 5'1"

If only he'd been dominant, then I might have understood better what you're feeling.

I *can* understand the need to feel smaller, helpless, taken care of though.

I'm curious to hear more too.

I remember hating being tall for YEARS (I'm 5'8"), and more or less recently learning to accept it. I remember in high school I would lament to myself about all the ways that I could've stunted my growth growing up... though I donno, is there any merit to all those rumors at all anyways? Hehe.

There's both a sense of pride and embarrassment that goes along with this: there's the "I'm into something incredibly rare, under-appreciated, and 100% harmless. I should be able to be open about it and be proud of how it's contributed to who I am without fear of (too much) harassment!", but the other side of the coin reminds me that it is something that can only exist in the realm of fantasy, and that makes me a little uncomfortable and a little ashamed. Even furries (as strange as the lot of them are) seem to have it better than me: if they really wanted, they could go out and have sex in a fursuit and be satisfied.

I can't go and buy something and ask my bf to put it on and suddenly he's capable of fulfilling every fantasy I've ever had. There's no equipment that he could purchase, no body part that he could stimulate that could make this any more real and tangible than a replicator or FTL drive. I'd apologize for the nerdspeak, but even that is analogous to how I feel about this whole thing. Getting beaten, getting pissed on, getting encased in saran wrap... those are all real wishes that can be fulfilled, and I feel like a complete sexual dork for occupying myself with something that can't ever exist.

I linked my guy to this thread so he could read it and maybe find out a little more about what makes me tick. I came out to him about this a few weeks ago, and he was very receptive and understanding (my god, I'm so lucky to have him). I just don't want him to think that I want him to change because of this. I don't want him to feel like he needs to act differently around me now, either out of awkwardness or accommodation. I love him just the way he is. He's expressed interest in venturing down the bdsm road with me, and I'm very thankful for that... I'm hoping that in doing so, we'll figure out some small way to perhaps legitimize this fetish and make it work for the both of us.

 

[Netzach]

So your interest is in the people (or person of interest) around you being whatever height he is, but you are little.

While reality might not accommodate this is something that erotic hypnosis could be applied to, maybe, with some good results - if that's not an active turn-off it might be something the two of you could look into together. I like the book "look into my eyes" by Peter Masters as a nonthreatening and workable intro.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

I don't know if I qualify as a macrophile, but what you said about having grown up tall and wishing to be smaller really struck a chord with me. I share that history, and I know it has shaped my tendency to be appealed to by the larger guys. I'm 5'9" and tend to go for people who make me feel at least a bit diminutive.

It's not a literal fetish, in that it isn't necessary for me and I have had and do have lovers who are my size or slightly shorter. But I've noticed a pretty strong pattern over the years.

I like what you have to say here:

There's both a sense of pride and embarrassment that goes along with this: there's the "I'm into something incredibly rare, under-appreciated, and 100% harmless. I should be able to be open about it and be proud of how it's contributed to who I am without fear of (too much) harassment!", but the other side of the coin reminds me that it is something that can only exist in the realm of fantasy, and that makes me a little uncomfortable and a little ashamed. Even furries (as strange as the lot of them are) seem to have it better than me: if they really wanted, they could go out and have sex in a fursuit and be satisfied.

Some fantasies and kinks are certainly more easily satisfied than others, but I think most people go through a struggle with any desire that falls outside the norm. I like Netzach's suggestion of hypnotism to create those scenarios; that's certainly one way to approach it.

I hope that here and elsewhere you find, as many have, a supportive community of people who understand where you're coming from. Good luck!

 

[KoPilot]

I don't know if I qualify as a macrophile, but what you said about having grown up tall and wishing to be smaller really struck a chord with me. I share that history, and I know it has shaped my tendency to be appealed to by the larger guys. I'm 5'9" and tend to go for people who make me feel at least a bit diminutive.

It's not a literal fetish, in that it isn't necessary for me and I have had and do have lovers who are my size or slightly shorter. But I've noticed a pretty strong pattern over the years.

I know that there are lots of women who are attracted to tall men. I think that's pretty normal actually! I remember part of my celebrity-crush routine in high school involved looking up how tall they were. If they were shorter than me, I would almost always not find them attractive anymore. (Sadly, a lot of Hollywood actors are TINY, haha.)

My bf is the same height as I am, and it really doesn't bother me at all... in fact, I hardly notice it. If you love someone that much, it doesn't matter.

I hope that here and elsewhere you find, as many have, a supportive community of people who understand where you're coming from. Good luck!

Thank you! :]

 

[KoPilot]

So your interest is in the people (or person of interest) around you being whatever height he is, but you are little.

While reality might not accommodate this is something that erotic hypnosis could be applied to, maybe, with some good results - if that's not an active turn-off it might be something the two of you could look into together. I like the book "look into my eyes" by Peter Masters as a nonthreatening and workable intro.

Not exactly, that would be more of the "shrink" fetish... man, there are a LOT of subsets, now that I think about it.

And hmm, erotic hypnosis? You've piqued my interest. I think I'll do a little research!

 

[rosco rathbone]

I've always had a bit of a giantess fascination. That's where my Williams Sisters thing comes in. However, I see the giantesses as sort of placid, whale- or cow-like, rather fearless and innocent in the way of a very large organism that doesn't have much to fear from the natural environment. In this fantasy I am trying to hump them like an angry bee or a tiny, horny monkey, all pepped up with rage.

I think R. Crumb has something similar going on.

 

[KoPilot]

I've always had a bit of a giantess fascination. That's where my Williams Sisters thing comes in. However, I see the giantesses as sort of placid, whale- or cow-like, rather fearless and innocent in the way of a very large organism that doesn't have much to fear from the natural environment. In this fantasy I am trying to hump them like an angry bee or a tiny, horny monkey, all pepped up with rage.

I think R. Crumb has something similar going on.

I think you'd get along with Crumb REALLY well. xD
Actually, I take that back. I don't think he gets along with too many people.

You gotta admit that he's one hell of an interesting guy, though.

 

[BiBunny]

I always get macrophilia and microphilia confused and have to look it up. Macro is where you want the other person to be bigger than a real person, and micro is where you want yourself to be smaller than a real person. Right? Or have I screwed it up again, LOL?

 

[rosco rathbone]

I think you'd get along with Crumb REALLY well. xD
Actually, I take that back. I don't think he gets along with too many people.

You gotta admit that he's one hell of an interesting guy, though.

Anyone who wants to know my psychosexuality need only peruse his works.

 

[KoPilot]

I always get macrophilia and microphilia confused and have to look it up. Macro is where you want the other person to be bigger than a real person, and micro is where you want yourself to be smaller than a real person. Right? Or have I screwed it up again, LOL?

Hehe, that's alright! Macro is when you want a lover bigger than yourself, and micro is when you want a lover smaller than yourself. (Those people seem to be in much shorter supply for some reason! Fortunately for the macro community, women are usually pretty good about getting into it. That seems to be VERY much linked to Domme headspace, I think, because I hear stories about what these gals do for their macro boyfriends/husbands, and it almost always involves displays of physical domination like facesitting, walking/standing on them, and threats of other physical violence. It would be interesting to poll both groups and see how they compare...)

 

[KoPilot]

Anyone who wants to know my psychosexuality need only peruse his works.

I heartily approve of you, sir. Rock on.

 

[EustaceMcGargle]

I've always had a bit of a giantess fascination. That's where my Williams Sisters thing comes in. However, I see the giantesses as sort of placid, whale- or cow-like, rather fearless and innocent in the way of a very large organism that doesn't have much to fear from the natural environment. In this fantasy I am trying to hump them like an angry bee or a tiny, horny monkey, all pepped up with rage.

I think R. Crumb has something similar going on.

I went through a similar phase in my adolescence. I guess I was around. . . 12 or so and I read Gulliver's travels. On his trip to Brobdingnag, (the land of Giants), he is captured and kept as a pet by. . .Here my memory get fuzzy. . . Either the Queen or the King and Queen's daughter. (My memory says daughter, but I can't find any mention of her on-line - but let's pretend its the daughter to stay consistent with my memory and fantasies).

Well, Gulliver is more trouble than he is worth and the King intends to build him a tiny boat and send him off to sea. The daughter grabs him and hides him in her bosom, runs to her bedroom and cries herself to sleep.

To me, at the age of 12, the erotic possibilities of such a situation seemed endless. Eventually my tastes morphed into a more 'conventional' need to be dominated. (never thought I'd say THAT!) But to this day, the erotic logistics of a really tall woman, and a short round guy like myself give me a special thrill.

 

[KoPilot]

I went through a similar phase in my adolescence. I guess I was around. . . 12 or so and I read Gulliver's travels. On his trip to Brobdingnag, (the land of Giants), he is captured and kept as a pet by. . .Here my memory get fuzzy. . . Either the Queen or the King and Queen's daughter. (My memory says daughter, but I can't find any mention of her on-line - but let's pretend its the daughter to stay consistent with my memory and fantasies).

Well, Gulliver is more trouble than he is worth and the King intends to build him a tiny boat and send him off to sea. The daughter grabs him and hides him in her bosom, runs to her bedroom and cries herself to sleep.

To me, at the age of 12, the erotic possibilities of such a situation seemed endless. Eventually my tastes morphed into a more 'conventional' need to be dominated. (never thought I'd say THAT!) But to this day, the erotic logistics of a really tall woman, and a short round guy like myself give me a special thrill.

Gulliver's travels was brain porn for me as a kid. I never read the book, but the movie that came out in the... 30's I believe? was an epic. Indian in the Cupboard (book and movie) was one of my favorites too.

This seems to be a fetish that a lot of guys have, or at least have had sometime in their adolescence. I wonder what it is?

I've also been thinking about this paraphilia and how it relates to others, and I think it might be wholly unique in that it is purely contextual. It's not an action or an object, it is a state of being in relation to other things. You can't have an image of an individual on a blank background, say they're 50 feet tall, and expect people to get turned on. In order for it to matter, that person has to be pictured with someone smaller, or next to some buildings... some kind of standard candle by which to determine whether or not it's relevant to the fetishist's interests.

 

[EustaceMcGargle]

Gulliver's travels was brain porn for me as a kid. I never read the book, but the movie that came out in the... 30's I believe? was an epic. Indian in the Cupboard (book and movie) was one of my favorites too.

This seems to be a fetish that a lot of guys have, or at least have had sometime in their adolescence. I wonder what it is?

I've also been thinking about this paraphilia and how it relates to others, and I think it might be wholly unique in that it is purely contextual. It's not an action or an object, it is a state of being in relation to other things. You can't have an image of an individual on a blank background, say they're 50 feet tall, and expect people to get turned on. In order for it to matter, that person has to be pictured with someone smaller, or next to some buildings... some kind of standard candle by which to determine whether or not it's relevant to the fetishist's interests.

I suspect you are correct that many, maybe most men, go through a phase such as this. Maybe it is even a necessary stage to separate other women from mommy. Ahhh! But what do I know? My sexuality solidified at the 'kitten with a whip' stage!

I think though, my guess is consistent with your observation about comparing the self with something else.

 

[where]

I have a bit of a fetish for very tall men, but they have to be in proportion (not like giraffe man down the street). The saddest most pathethetic thing I will admit to is getting tall men to get stuff off the top shelf in the supermarket just so I can stand next to them.

 

[Stella_Omega]

A friend of mine had a webcomic, letters to a wild boar which i hope some day she might go back to...
At one point she started noticing a huge spike in hits. They were coming from a forum for "process fetishists" a term I had never ever heard of before that!

They were looking at this sequence;
http://www.letterstoawildboar.com/index.php?date=2007-02-11
http://www.letterstoawildboar.com/index.php?date=2007-02-12

 

[KoPilot]

A friend of mine had a webcomic, letters to a wild boar which i hope some day she might go back to...
At one point she started noticing a huge spike in hits. They were coming from a forum for "process fetishists" a term I had never ever heard of before that!

They were looking at this sequence;
http://www.letterstoawildboar.com/index.php?date=2007-02-11
http://www.letterstoawildboar.com/index.php?date=2007-02-12

...you did NOT just tell me that Cami is a friend of yours.

I went to school with her!

FREAKY.

And omg, I totally remember her telling us about that in class one day! She attributed it to being linked to from a growth fetish forum, and I'm not particularly inclined toward that subgenre.

Man, I still can't believe how small of a world it is.

(PS- I'm still jealous that vicodin managed do have that effect on her. I have to take a billion percocets before I feel anything more than lightheaded. Even then, the pain doesn't lessen, but I'm usually high enough to be alright with it.)

 

[Stella_Omega]

...you did NOT just tell me that Cami is a friend of yours.

I went to school with her!

FREAKY.

And omg, I totally remember her telling us about that in class one day! She attributed it to being linked to from a growth fetish forum, and I'm not particularly inclined toward that subgenre.

Man, I still can't believe how small of a world it is.

and I say again,

 

[rosco rathbone]

I have a bit of a fetish for very tall men, but they have to be in proportion (not like giraffe man down the street). The saddest most pathethetic thing I will admit to is getting tall men to get stuff off the top shelf in the supermarket just so I can stand next to them.

 

[KoPilot]

I was thinking more about how the macro fetish is related to bdsm yesterday (I like to think a lot, derp derp) and it occurred to me that the fantasy of being in a relationship with a giant/ess would be very similar to living the 24/7 lifestyle.

Why? Because there's no safeword, nothing you could say or do that would undo the power exchange. Just by being in the presence of a big person, you are relinquishing power to them simply because you are much smaller. And because of that, they automatically are imparted the role of dominant, because the safety and well-being of the little with them is their responsibility. They have the power to hurt and manipulate them, or they have the power to keep them safe. Some people want a mindful giant/ess that understands and respects the position/wishes of their little, and others want to be treated like nothing more than an object. These situations don't even have to extend themselves to sexual situations. Sometimes these fantasies encompass more casual interactions as well, just like how some bdsm sessions have very little to do with sex.