Love at first sight...is there such a thing?

[infamousfobb]

Most people have at one time or another have said "I loved you from the very first moment I laid eyes on you". However, is there such a thing? Can you "love" someone the first time you see them? I'm curious as to what others on this board think. Here's my answer:

I don't think there is such a thing as love at first sight, only lust at first sight. When you first look at someone, you might lust over someone's appearance, but there's no way you can "fall in love" with that person. You don't know a damn thing about them, other than how they look. Once you get to know someone, and if you hit it off really well, that's how lust turns into love. A lot of of people fall into lust, and after months or years later they actually fall in love, and these people usually believe that because they are in love, that they loved this person "at first sight". Getting to know the other person, sharing experiences, learning to trust them with your deepest secrets is how I believe love comes about. It's funny too, cuz many friends of mine always say "man, am I in love", and it's like they saw the girl from across the room, if that were true, than most of my friends have loved like a hundred women in their 20-23 year old lifetimes.

I've been with my girlfriend for 4 years, the first time I saw her, I just said "wow, she's beautiful, I want to get to know her". Upon first seeing her, I had emotions of lust, it's not until sharing lots of experiences with her, good and bad, that I can say that I truly, truly love her.

Anyone else care to comment?

 

[Starfish]

I actually think you have some good points, but I disagree that no one can have it happen, and that is simply lust at first sight. I know what you are talking about and it is common, and what I experianced is probably uncommon, but it is no less valid.


The first time I laid eyes on him I thought to myself that there is someone I could love, and that I wanted to get to know him and that I knew there was many things about him that I was intrigued by and even the things that I'd hate or be bothered by I would love equally, because they are part of him.

I don't know why, but something inside me told me that he was someone I loved and could love regardless of what he was like, as long as he wasn't violent, and he isn't.

I've come to realize that it isn't about sex at all. Sex is easy to come by if you try. I've never had a problem... It's rare to find someone like that, and hell, when it happens, you just know it.

He exudes a passion I've never seen before. Funny that I didn't know a thing about him, but I just knew I could love him and over time, what I've learned of him has only supported and strengthend my initial feelings on the matter. Everything that I know and am learning reinforces that I will love him and always will. It is a sacrifice though. I think I love him selflessly. I don't really care what I get out of it. I just want him to be happy, fullfilled, and to know that I love and care for him very much.


We have our hard times, but we've been together 5 years, and married for 4.

True love includes loving each others faults, as well as our talents.

 

[Kitte]

I dont believe in "Love at first sight" but...I do believe in something so much more. I believe that there can be between some people, a moment when they first meet and their eyes connect and you see something different, it is a feeling, it is not sexual it is as though you look into their eyes and say to yourself... "Oh so this is what it has all been about, this is what it is like looking into the eyes of my future."

It has happened to me once. I dont think it can happen again. It is the most wonderful, exciting, scary feeling I have ever known.

 

[Bob_Bytchin]

I had many "love at first sight" experiences....but unfortunately, those moments were killed when they would speak.

 

[infamousfobb]

Kitte,
That's exactly what I'm talking about, the first time I saw my girlfriend, I felt the same way. It was a feeling like if I don't come over and talk to her, I might regret it for the rest of my life. I'm sorry you lost yours, I hope you'll be able to experience it again.

Starfish,
I don't take lust as just meaming sex, or being sexually attracted. For me, what I meant when I said I had "lust at first sight", it's kind of like having a lifelong crush on someone, but you make eye contact with this person for the first time, and you just get this feeling that you have to talk to them, get to know them, because if you don't, you might be making a mistake that you'll regret forever. Even if it doesn't turn out well, it's a chance that you feel you just have to take, that to me is also lust.

 

[I'mVan]

Love at first sight seems to presuppose that 'true love' exists. Don't believe in either. Do believe that given lust at fitst sight, it can develope into love without seeming to break it's stride.

 

[Starfish]

Even if it doesn't turn out well, it's a chance that you feel you just have to take, that to me is also lust.

I see. That is cool and you're probably right. I admit love and lust are hard to differentiate between.


Well, honestly, I think you are right only based on the feeling in my pants right now.

j/k

 

[deliciously_naughty]

You can want someone at first sight (want to know them, want to fuck them, want to talk to them), but love at first sight is bs. Love, real love, is based on knowledge and acceptence of an individual.

 

[Guest]

love at first sight is bullshit, only fucking is true

 

[horny_giraffe]

You can feel a lot of things when you look at someone for the first time. You might see a t-shirt with the name of your favorite band--fostering a feeling that this is a person that could understand you, an adorable little hat that makes a girl look like a little pixie, or a familiar gesture that makes you feel like you've known her all your life. You might be surprised at an introduction of unexpected candor and think that this might be the most sincere person you've ever known. Perhaps you had a dream that you married a person that looked like her when you were a child--and for a moment your mind is bursting with mystical notions of destiny.

A lot can happen in a few seconds. A mind races to summon up a dream; stories of love and romance rush through your head; the voices of friends and relatives buzz in your ears--then the moment is now. All of your thoughts and dreams can crystalize in a single moment when you look over at a person until you finally start your normal life again with a simple greeting.

"Hello."

Life continues as normal. A dog barks in the distance. But the memories of those thoughts rushing through your head still remain. The face of that stranger has been there, all through this extended moment. In your thoughts, her face has become familiar.