Looking for help with a first person story

[football_stud]

I am writing a first person incestuous story. I am not very good at writing but I want to improve and have decided to keep writing more and more and try and get better. I was just wondering if there is anything I can do than keep saying "I" a lot. It just seems repetitive to me and would not be interesting to a reader

 

[HappilyM]

I am not sure what you mean by a lot

All I write is 1st person stories. The use of 'I' and "me" are necessary. If you don't mind me taking a look at it. I would be more than honored. If you feel like there is a particular passage that seems that the use of 'I' is overly prevalent, post it in its entirety and let other's have a look.

The whole point behind a 1st person POV is to relate that person's feelings and inner most thoughts to the reader. A 1st person is meant to give the reader a 3 dimensional view into one person and how the others relate to the lead.

 

[snooper]

... I was just wondering if there is anything I can do than keep saying "I" a lot. It just seems repetitive to me and would not be interesting to a reader

Try third person "fly on the wall" POV. Most of the greatest writers ever have used this.

 

[football_stud]

I really appreciate the repsonses. I know you using "I" and "me" is necessary but like if I am describing what I am doing it is in tehre a lot

 

[cream_robot]

As long as we understand that you (as the author) are also the speaker in the story, then it is fine to go into the third person. Just describe what you see. Also, the more care you take with that description, the less it will seem that you're just talking about yourself. Take these three examples:

#1 - BAD.

I watched as Jenna wound her fingers through the strings of her panties. I felt myself getting hard as her eyes drifted towards my cock. When I saw her pull the first string loose and exposed her bare flesh, I couldn't help myself, and I knelt down to pull her panties away with my teeth.

#2 - BETTER.

Jenna wound her fingers through the strings of her panties. Her eyes drifted towards my cock. Just the thought of her looking at my cock got me hard. She pulled the first string loose and exposed her bare flesh. Going crazy, I knelt down to pull her panties away with my teeth.

#3 - BETTERER.

Jenna wound her fingers through the strings of her silk panties, then gently tugged at the strings until the panties almost popped loose and fell from her slender hips. Leaning back against the pillow, she flashed me a wicked smile from behind her locks of red hair, then scanned my entire body with her eyes until they settled on my cock. Just the thought of her looking at my cock got me hard. Jenna's fingernails settled into the final knots of the panty strings, and she pulled them loose, exposing her bare flesh. I knelt down, my heart racing. The scent of her pussy was sweet, and as I pulled the panties away with my teeth, a drop of her hot wetness ran down the panty string and onto the sheets. Her wicked smile turned to a gasping moan as soon as I flicked my tongue across her pussy lips.

Anyway, I hope that helps!

 

[Iggy_Piggy]

I am writing a first person incestuous story. I am not very good at writing but I want to improve and have decided to keep writing more and more and try and get better. I was just wondering if there is anything I can do than keep saying "I" a lot. It just seems repetitive to me and would not be interesting to a reader

I believe most readers don't notice pronouns all that much. What seems to get old, at least for me, is repetitive sentence structure.

I cut the following section from an arbitrary story:

She was about 5'7" tall, with long brown hair and a nice set of tits that I stared at some times in class. She had a nice pair of legs that I would love to just caress. She is not very thin but not very chubby. She mostly dressed conservative but sometimes a little bit adventurous. She frequently wore long skirts that were slit up the leg. I would stare at her legs when they came out of the dress. Sometimes I would ask her for help and she would bend over and her breasts were right there. I felt like staring at them and just grabbing them and ripping her shirt off and tittie fucking them.

While it may not be representative of your writing, see how many sentences start with the subject? Five in a row start with 'She' - and that's a potential issue whether you are using first or third person perspective. How about mixing things up just a bit?

Mrs. Jones was a tall brunette whose hair reached almost to her waist. Her legs were even longer than her locks, though too often she covered these with the long skirts that were a staple of her conservative attire. Sweaters most often went with her long skirts, much to my dismay- because nothing fascinated me more than her breasts. On those days she chose to show even a hint of clevage, I'd always go to her desk and ask her questions in hopes she would lean over and offer me a peek down her blouse. The sight of her partially exposed bosom never failed to set both my mind and my pulse racing.

So that's my suggestion- stick with first person perspective if that's what you prefer, but mix up the sentence structure a bit so it doesn't get monotonous.