Long Term Menage e trois... Feasible?

[EridanMan]

Well, I figure I'd kick off my new literotica habit with a bit of a controversial subject/question...

(for an intro to who I am, see https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=394748)

My fiancee and I have a long running, very powerful fantasy to include another girl in our relationship... Not just a one-night thing, but and actual, 3-way love affair...

We've done 3-ways for 'fun'... and I must say, they rarely end up being so... We both have a thing for needing a certain intimacy with an individual to enjoy making love to them, and the situations we've had so far - that intimacy was most definitely not present... I mean, it was fun - but not what either of us were looking for.

This has lead us both share the very strong fantasy of finding a third, a likeminded woman who we can both fall in love with, share, and live out in a true Menage e Trois (litterally, house of 3), its gone so far as we've both agreed that if such individual came around we would put off our long term plans until such time as we could figure out how to all be involved- equally in the relationship.

Now - obviously the most important factor in anything like this would be the individual we find - its one thing to say 'find the perfect woman', its another to actually find an individual whose life experience and personality meshes with your own - doubly difficult when there is another individual involved. However - I was just curious what you guys thought of such arrangements- are they possible? are they practical? Or are they like communism - great in theory, but miserable in practice... I really don't know. We both deeply yearn for the same thing - but could it work in reality?

You guys are a more sexually experienecd bunch, what do you think?

-Scott

 

[Missingmeds]

Polyamorous people call it a triad and I would suggest that might be something that you want to do a little reading on.

 

[EridanMan]

Thanks - I had not heard that term.

A quick search on here has yielded a plethora of information...

Still interested any other insights you guys might have

 

[Leftwriter]

Feasible, possibly even preferable

These situations do exist and in far greater numbers than people realize. In Europe (France, in particular), long term relationships between husbands/wives and their lovers are fairly commonplace. In this respect, everyone often knows one another and are even friends. This moves into the next category, where everyone involved has some sort of sexual relationship.
I assume by your post that you are interested in a sexual triad, that is a relationship that includes sexual contact between all members. This is certainly possible, but you'd better get in line if you chose to find such a person through personal ads. Single bisexual women are rare. It is not, as some believe, that bisexual women are rare, but rather that bisexual women tend to be relationship-oriented and find themselves in a relationship already when they are ready to seek out a third. To that extent, most bisexual women are already married/partnered, so when a couple that includes a bisexual wife begin looking to complete their family, they end up being one of many such couples looking for a third among a very small population of single bisexual women. A difficult situation. Also, you might want to be aware that though there are polyamorous personals sites, such as polymatchmaker.com, there is a strong anti-FMF triad culture among the single bisexual female population. You will often see abbreviations such as HBB as a means of criticising couples such as yourself. (HBB means Hot Bisexual Babe, a reference to what are perceived to be a male-female couple where the guy is a pig and the woman is "just curious" who are looking for an attractive single girl to be their sexual plaything and slave). This is as unfair as any other label, but there it is.
We have had greater success, and you might to, by simply forming strong friendships with people that you both like and enjoy having around. In time, after you and your wife have had time to sort out your feelings and, in particular, have had a chance to experience the dynamic of having a third person around, you can discuss the nature of your marriage and the concept of polyfidelity with this third person. This sort of coming out can be as uncomfortable as any other "coming out", so it is important that you develop a relationship wth someone that you are honest with. Poly relationships require a tremendous dedication to honesty and it is the failure to be honest with yourself and those with whom you are involved that will likely end any possibility of a good outcome.
That being said, I wish you the best of luck. There are success stories out there, yours might be one too someday.