Long distance D/s, Writing Assignments, Etc.

[Zaudika]

With permission from my loving Dom, that I'm temporarily many miles away from, I wanted to start this thread.

One of the things that He just recently started doing, was giving me writing assignments. Today I went out and bought a specific journal/book for it. I'm so excited about it, and took some pictures to post of it on this thread so that I can share with others.

Another aspect of this thread was that I wanted some feedback, input from others who have been away from their Dom's for periods of time. What kind of assignments were you given, what kind of things have you done without being able to physically be in contact with each other. If of course you feel comfortable posting them.

A pic of the outside of the book.

 

[Zaudika]

This shows the bow and arrow that are on the front a bit better. And the two keys.. one of which I'll have, the other which he'll have. One of the things I like about this book is it does actually have a fairly good lock on it.
Though you can't see it clearly, it also has a ton of writing all over it.. in another language.. its written backwards, and in a fancy kind of writing.. I don't know what it says yet,.. but it's beautiful.

 

[Zaudika]

when you unlock the cover.. this is the front page of the actually book.

 

[Zaudika]

There's a couple places in the book that it has artwork like this.. all sexy.. romantic... All with different kinds of sayings.

 

[Zaudika]

Ok.. last picture. .. I just really want to share my excitement. This is the inside of the book. Each page has a small area with some kind of love quote. Then of course all of the area for writing.

One of the things that caught my eye first about the book was this paragraph printed on the front page:

"Within the furthest reaches of the heart lie those desires whose name one dares not speak. So seductive, so intoxicating, so indulgent, our most private passions burn at the molten core of our being, luring us to the very heights of ecstasy and depths of despair. Through the ages, the words of impassioned lovers have transformed a virginal sheet of paper into a sanctuary for a restless heart. Each of the pages in this journal awaits the expression of your own desires- unedited, undiluted, uninhibited. Abandon yourself."

There's many many other quotes I love in the book, and some that I don't really like very much... overall though, it was exactly what i was looking for, and perfect.

 

[Zaudika]

The inside picture.. that I forgot to put on the last post.

 

[Ebonyfire]

That is a beautiful book, thanks for sharing.

 

[WynEternal]

I agree... nice book.

 

[lark sparrow]

What a wonderful book to write and share in.

I'm doing the LDR as well, with visits. One or both of us will eventually have to move - about 4 states stand achingly between us.

We don't do writing assignments, though I can see the appeal. I've seen them used online as punishment/discipline tools as well. She is fairly recently out of several years of university and it would be far more punishing to Her to have to read pages and pages then it would be for me to write them. She rarely participates at this forum because it is too much reading lol. She is having a long-awaited holiday from studying and reading.

I can of course speak or write to Her about anything, but She appreciates the condensed version if available, and prefers speaking. Our discussions are usually less formal, immediate conversation (rather than delayed, writing back and forth, as that is less Her style), but I can definitely see the appeal of writing and a beautiful book to do it in.

In the absence of physically being together, we spend as much time as possible in private messages online throughout the day and night, and speak on the telephone nightly.

 

[MissTaken]

Journaling

I have many thoughts.

The journal can be a connection between you and him and possibly be your gift to him when you meet again. I have journaled but it was never used as discipline, merely as a tool for communication and connection.

Some things that have been part of my journaling excercises are:
~Writing expectations, hopes, dreams and fantasies, in detail.
~journaling past relationships in an effort to give Him a feel for what I needed and what direction He should move into.
~In your case, poetry might be a nice door to open. You have the skills and He is a poet at heart as well as in text.
~Writing random thoughts, fears, highs and lows in the LDR. The journal is a great way to feel reconnected. CArry it with you always.
~He could tell you, when talking, "Add that to the journal" so as to remind you or Him of dreams, thoughts or moments you shared.
~Writing erotica! Giggles...keep you mind busy when your body can't be.
Even with out assignments, write every day....you will love it

 

[Zaudika]

Thank you for the compliments on the beauty of the book everyone. I do really love it.

I love all your suggestions MissT.. and I think all of them will become parts of the writing that I do.
I have had and have separate journals that I keep also. But while they are still very private, I don't write about the BDSM side of my life in them. They will be books that my children will probably one day have, and I don't think that this one that I'm keeping now between my Dom and I will be one that I keep for my children. I think journal writing is an extremely important part to someone's life.

 

[FungiUg]

I use writing to explore my own desires. (While this includes sexual, in the past it has mostly been writing poetry to explore my feelings, emotions, thoughts and so on.) So as a means of communication if even just for yourself, I can't recommend it highly enough.

I have a "thing" about long distance relationships, and wouldn't deliberately enter into one because of that. But I can certainly feel for someone who's lover has been away for some time! Writing can certainly help.

All relationships need frequent communication to be kept alive. So regular writing is part of that. To be honest I would recommend daily exchanges -- even a chatty e-mail of inconsequentials and "I miss you" is good. Phone calls are better again, but not always practical.

Best of luck!

 

[Zaudika]

I use writing to explore my own desires. (While this includes sexual, in the past it has mostly been writing poetry to explore my feelings, emotions, thoughts and so on.) So as a means of communication if even just for yourself, I can't recommend it highly enough.

I have a "thing" about long distance relationships, and wouldn't deliberately enter into one because of that. But I can certainly feel for someone who's lover has been away for some time! Writing can certainly help.

All relationships need frequent communication to be kept alive. So regular writing is part of that. To be honest I would recommend daily exchanges -- even a chatty e-mail of inconsequentials and "I miss you" is good. Phone calls are better again, but not always practical.

Best of luck!

I do understand what you're saying, and a LDR is never been something that I was big on either.
However, when you meet the person you feel you're supposed to be with, sometimes distance gets in the way for a little while. It's only going to be for a couple more months at very most though. And we always talk one way or another each day.

 

[FungiUg]

I do understand what you're saying, and a LDR is never been something that I was big on either.
However, when you meet the person you feel you're supposed to be with, sometimes distance gets in the way for a little while. It's only going to be for a couple more months at very most though. And we always talk one way or another each day.

Good, because I believe communication is the key to every successful relationship! And I will wish you all the best of luck.

The journal sounds like a fun idea, by the way. I would be interested to hear whether you feel it is worth keeping going even when you are back together.

 

[Zaudika]

Good, because I believe communication is the key to every successful relationship! And I will wish you all the best of luck.

The journal sounds like a fun idea, by the way. I would be interested to hear whether you feel it is worth keeping going even when you are back together.

I agree. Communication, trust, and love are the three things that I think are essential for any relationship to work. I've been in many relationships where communication is bad, and because of that, the relationship has fallen apart. (among other things of course)...

I'll always keep some kind of journal, and I think that I will keep a BDSM journal if anything for myself once we're together again. Whether or not I still keep one for writing assignments that are given to me from Him, or letters that I write specifically for Him, would ultimately be His choice.

 

[MissTaken]

I found a link, and there are many more:

http://www.bdsmu.com/page_essay_journaling.html

"What's the point of journalling?"

 

[Zaudika]

Re: I found a link, and there are many more:

http://www.bdsmu.com/page_essay_journaling.html

"What's the point of journalling?"

Awesome link hon, .. very straightforward information.

 

[T.J. Jackson]

Good thread and some good information about journaling. I have a question though. Besides journaling what other types of writing assignments have been given?

Were you given a writing assignment by your Dom/mes that was non-BDSM or relationship related? For instance....something that interested you but your Dom/me had no understanding about or something that interested your Dom/me but you had no clue about and he wanted you to find out more about it.

 

[Quint]

T and I have been in a long distance relationship for 8 months, with visits oh, every other month or so. It sucks much, much harder than I could ever strive for. o)

Because I am a writer and he knows it, he often sets me "assignments," which are sometimes stories, sometimes poems. He usually gives me a prompt or a style and lets my imagination run free from there, with what has inevitably been amazing results. I just wrote him a poem yesterday, as a matter of fact.

I haven't kept a journal for him, nor do I find the need to because we talk and exchange emails every day. But the stories and poems are special. They encourage my creativity and my productivity, both of which need nudging every so often. And I love both that he cares enough about me and my abilities to request such things from me, and also that he admires me and my abilities enough to truly read and appreciate the products.

This is a small, blank book of homemade paper that I found in St. Louis. I can't wait until I write something I find worthy of putting in here.

 

[MissTaken]

Good thread and some good information about journaling. I have a question though. Besides journaling what other types of writing assignments have been given?

Were you given a writing assignment by your Dom/mes that was non-BDSM or relationship related? For instance....something that interested you but your Dom/me had no understanding about or something that interested your Dom/me but you had no clue about and he wanted you to find out more about it.

Sure.
I remember one Dom who had me write about my experiences to date, with BDSM and then, about my relationships that were in a non BDSM context.

Also, sometimes, just giving your submissive a term or idea that they need to explore in writing can be enlightening.
i.e. respect or love

Another Dom, threatened that if I misbehaved, he would have me write the equivalent of term papers. Since he was an historian and I was lousy with history, that certainly scared me to the straight and narrow path!

 

[His_sugar]

i have a daily journal ( many now ) that i keep for my Master. The first set of three, lost by the US Postal Service at Christmas time, completely broke my heart.

i love that i am able to share with Him the things we just don't have the time during the day to speak about. It gives Him such a deeper insight to my feelings and emotions, beyond the daily routine.

i also have a website with a dedicated journal section for Him to read as i post them. This has been a very good tool for us.

i love the peace of mind i have during my writing time. Kneeling with my journal, filling it with my heart and soul has been a very cleansing experience for me.

Good luck with yours!

basque