Litiquette VII

My ability to provide high quality sex to my partner is:

  • I am without a doubt the highest quality sex partner there is. I will make you cum and I will cum, a

    Votes: 54 25.2%
  • I have more kinks than most, nothing inappropriate but you’ll be shocked at what I like

    Votes: 107 50.0%
  • I’m good. I get the job done, not much flair but there’ll be no need for masturbation after

    Votes: 46 21.5%
  • I mostly provide sex as a service. I’ve never really enjoyed it so I won’t seek it out, but when ask

    Votes: 1 0.5%
  • I’m as vanilla as it gets. I hope you have a great imagination, you’ll likely need it to keep things

    Votes: 6 2.8%

  • Total voters
    214
I'd tickle some balls and make guys feel a little uncomfortable.

I'd also like to just fuck with people, kinda like I do in real life. I love finding someone's facebook page open. I go in and change their birthday to a week or so after the date. It's a long con cause I have to wait for their birthday to roll around before I get any satisfaction but it's pretty entertaining.

I'm evil.

Sounds fun to me. If you need a ghost in partner, give me a call. :D
 
I’ll probably get punished by Trekka and Naughty (at least, I hope I will :devil:) but here’s a question:

Since Lit is a forum from the 1990’s that has hardly been updated since, it occurred to me what if we all got Bruce Willis’d <—-Sixth Sense reference (90’s movie), and we realized that we actually died in the 90’s and we have been haunting Lit all this time! :eek:

If you just realized you were a ghost, what is the first thing you would do?

How do you know I'm not?

Perhaps that light sensation on the back of your neck even now is me laughing quietly.

Can you prove I'm not, Neo?

Can you prove that you aren't just experiencing Jacob's Ladder?
 
Ok, let’s get ready to rumble folks.

The best, supreme, hands down ultimate sandwich spread is Mayo or Miracle Whip? And state your case please.

And no, no ... don’t come here and be like “I don’t use either, dry bread is the shit.”
 
Ok, let’s get ready to rumble folks.

The best, supreme, hands down ultimate sandwich spread is Mayo or Miracle Whip? And state your case please.

And no, no ... don’t come here and be like “I don’t use either, dry bread is the shit.”

If my choice is between the two, mayonnaise. I don't have a hate on for miracle whip, it's got that zip, but I prefer mayo and you can make it at home fairly easily. Plus, it makes more sense in coleslaw or other dressings because you can control the other flavours (technically speaking, miracle whip is a dressing on its own.)

Mustard gets a bad wrap though, I'm likely to head there for a sandwich over the other two. Or an aioli, which I guess is kind of basically mayo.

All this take about creamy, white substances and sandwiches, you'd think it's filthy Friday.
 
Ok, let’s get ready to rumble folks.

The best, supreme, hands down ultimate sandwich spread is Mayo or Miracle Whip? And state your case please.

And no, no ... don’t come here and be like “I don’t use either, dry bread is the shit.”

Sorry SMN, but I like both of them, it depends on the sandwich. But if I had to choose only one then it would be Duke's Mayonnaise. Mayo just does better on a good hamburger than Miracle Whip does.
 
Ok, let’s get ready to rumble folks.

The best, supreme, hands down ultimate sandwich spread is Mayo or Miracle Whip? And state your case please.

And no, no ... don’t come here and be like “I don’t use either, dry bread is the shit.”

I'll take both. But I typically buy Mayo

I just saw this on Facebook too..

attachment.php
 
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Historical fact about mayonnaise

Most people don't know that back in 1912, Hellmann's mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact, the Titanic was carrying 20,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York. This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico.

But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York. The ship hit an iceberg and sank, and the cargo was forever lost. The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss.

Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning, which they still observe to this day. The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as Sinko de Mayo.
 
I'll take both. But I typically buy Mayo

I just saw this on Facebook too..

attachment.php

Mayo all the way 100% of the time......

And WTF is miracle whip? - sorry excuse the ignorance but I’m a Brit and I’m guessing it’s close to the equally gross Salad Cream we have?
 
Mayo all the way 100% of the time......

And WTF is miracle whip? - sorry excuse the ignorance but I’m a Brit and I’m guessing it’s close to the equally gross Salad Cream we have?

Miracle Whip is a cheap alternative to mayo created in the 1930s (Great Depression). It's lower in fat and calories but has more sugar and additives. I've never heard of Salad Cream, so couldn't say just how similar it might be.

It's my understanding Miracle Whip is only available in America and Canada (with a slightly different formula available as Miracel Whip(?) in Germany).

If there is any data on whether it causes cancer in lab rats, that would have been after my misspent semester in college studying Food Technology. :p
 
Mayo all the way 100% of the time......

And WTF is miracle whip? - sorry excuse the ignorance but I’m a Brit and I’m guessing it’s close to the equally gross Salad Cream we have?

A close cousin apparently. :

Salad Cream is a pour-able, pale yellow boiled dressing sauce with a creamy consistency. It’s a close cousin to Miracle Whip, though it’s not thick like either Miracle Whip or Mayonnaise. Rather, it has the thickness of a very thick pouring cream or of bottled salad dressings such as Ranch. It’s thick enough that sometimes you have to encourage it to leave the bottle with a few bangs on the bottom, but because it’s thinner than Mayonnaise, it’s easier to mix into salads. It also now comes in squeezee bottles, in which the Salad Cream is a bit thinner.

It has a sharper taste, and is less sweet, than Miracle Whip. It is made of vinegar, eggs, milk or cream, butter, sugar, mustard and other spices.

Heinz is the most well known brand, though Crosse & Blackwell and many supermarkets make their own brands. The Heinz brand is made from water, vinegar, vegetable oil, sugar, egg yolks, mustard, salt, cornflour (aka cornstarch), stabilisers and preservatives.

Though unknown in America, Salad Cream is widely available on store shelves in Canada and in Australia, and in the UK, its fans are legion.
 
I have had both....growing up we had miracle whip but once in college and discovering steamed deli sandwiches it was mayo all the way....so bring out the Hellmann's and bring out the best!
 
Ok, let’s get ready to rumble folks.

The best, supreme, hands down ultimate sandwich spread is Mayo or Miracle Whip? And state your case please.

And no, no ... don’t come here and be like “I don’t use either, dry bread is the shit.”

Dijon creamy horseradish sauce
 
Most people don't know that back in 1912, Hellmann's mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact, the Titanic was carrying 20,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York. This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico.

But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York. The ship hit an iceberg and sank, and the cargo was forever lost. The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss.

Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning, which they still observe to this day. The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as Sinko de Mayo.

Dont we have a dad jokes thread?
 
I freaking love salad cream 🥰

And there's this japanese stuff that is out of this world!
Ugh. That reminds me. One of my favorite Salad Dressings I discovered in Japan. Sooooo hard to find here. :heart:
How am I, the cum hating bitch, the only one advocating for salad cream?!?

Um.. We like our cream to be thick and uh.. White.. Not yellow?? :p
 
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