LuciousLadyMary
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Dec 20, 2018
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Nothing beats a Sunday morning question. Well, okay, technically speaking a lot beats it but for the sake of this thread, I’ve always enjoyed the Sunday question. Don’t ask me why.....
This is a two part, inverse relationship type question. Read through, it’s not nearly as confusing as I make it out to be.
Guys - what percent of the blind PMs that you send, do you get a response to? Are you happy with that response rate? Are you one to carpet bomb all active women with the same basic message or are you selective and try to find the perfect hook?
Ladies - what percent of blind PMs do you respond to? Are you nice and respond to everyone or would you rather delete/ignore/move-on with most of them. I won’t ask you what you like in a PM, as that’s just priming the pump for the guys. Sorry guys, you’ll have to figure it out on your own.
I'm 100% useless at replying to PMs. It's really not my thing.
It's hardly personal (on both counts: whether I reply or not). I have done interesting conversations that I totally fizzle and forget to pick back up. I also struggle with keeping track of who I've met publicly and those I've met behind closed doors... I honestly thought about using a spreadsheet at one point, but fuck that!
Lit is not supposed to be this much work.
I will say to the guys ( and girls)- if you feel like I've ghosted you, it hasn't been intentional and I'm sorry if you thought I was doing it on purpose.
Ladies - what percent of blind PMs do you respond to? Are you nice and respond to everyone or would you rather delete/ignore/move-on with most of them. I won’t ask you what you like in a PM, as that’s just priming the pump for the guys. Sorry guys, you’ll have to figure it out on your own.

Blind PM's from established Litsters that I've seen posting around-- I'll respond to those.
Blind PM's from randos that have made 42 posts in five years (or 795 posts in two days) I ignore. It's the internet equivalent of not talking to strangers. Also, those PMs get my back up a little bit-- who are you? and why do you want to talk to me, again? it's also unbalanced -- they've been lurking around watching me, or can dig into my profile and post history, get a feel for what i'm like... and yet i know *zero* about them... i don't like that feeling. that's why rando PMs feel creepy.
I rarely send or receive a PM. I have sent a few out when I thought my comment was either way too late or just for that person (non sexual). I try to keep all my perverted filth on the boards where everyone can see--just like God intended.
I am open to PMs, dirty or otherwise, but I do (generally) like to keep things out in the open. That said, everyone should always feel free to PM me anytime as long as you are naked when you do.

I don't respond to blind PM's. If we've interacted on the boards, I am much more likely to respond. Unless you come off like a total jerk. Then I'll ignore you.
**snippee**
Hmmm. I'm not sure I'd bother to reply to a blind PM now. I'm on less and have less patience. Maybe there's a lesson in there somewhere. Blind PM success rates goes down as in direct proportion to the recipients time on Lit?
Blind PM's from established Litsters that I've seen posting around-- I'll respond to those.
Blind PM's from randos that have made 42 posts in five years (or 795 posts in two days) I ignore. It's the internet equivalent of not talking to strangers. Also, those PMs get my back up a little bit-- who are you? and why do you want to talk to me, again? it's also unbalanced -- they've been lurking around watching me, or can dig into my profile and post history, get a feel for what i'm like... and yet i know *zero* about them... i don't like that feeling. that's why rando PMs feel creepy.
This^^^ and this.....
I think so too. "Oldtimers" tend to know from experience what's going to come of it if they answer a PM, so we don't respond to a lot of them.
and this.
Yep. To me it's like someone watching me in a public place and then following me down the street afterwards when I leave alone. *shiver* OK, maybe not that bad, but you get the idea.

This really is such a good thread and, now that Chained is touring in his one man burlesque show, it has fallen off the face of the planet. Maybe we can revive it. But he was quite good at coming up with topics every day and is very dedicated to the thread.
I will pose a question today:
Post stalking- how stalkery are you? I mean, there are a few different levels of post stalking.
1. You have the “hey they look interesting, let’s see what this pmann guy is about” level of stalking. It’s casual. Not creepy. And I’m flattered by it.
2. “I’m in love with this person and I’m interested in everything they have to say, so I’m going to adoringly see what they’ve been up to.”
3. “I NEED TO SEE WHAT THIS PERSON IS DOING AND WHO ELSE IS FLIRTING WITH THEM.”
4. *knock knock* “I read your posts and I wanted to show up at your house and bring you the boiled head of your pet rabbit.”
There are likely some levels in between too. Where do you fall? Have you ever been obsessively stalked? Or been an obsessive stalker? Let’s hear the stories. Be open. This is a safe place.![]()
I'm in the #1 category. If people seem interesting or funny I want to see what else they have posted. It's also a great way to discover threads that I may have missed.
You also get the benefit of seeing their profile pic (if there is one) and read their profile (assuming they have one).
As far as being stalked on Lit, I'm cool with it. I prefer friends over freaks, but beggars can't be choosers.

I am a level 1 all the time. I frequently see someone either on boards or in my box and want to know more. I check profiles, threads they have created, last 200 comments, if they have stories, and what kind. Yes, I have checked yours long ago.
Occasionally I am a 1.5. I find someone interesting enough to check their activity every so often. There are about 12 people I do this with. 6 because everything they say pisses me off and sometimes I like to be pissed off and giving my screen the death glare. Then there are 6 people because I like them and like to see what they are up to.
I have already told you about my level 3 person. I am cool with level 1 and 2. Level 3 annoys me. 3.5 and 4 make me very uncomfortable.
I’m very flattered, HW.![]()

I’m very flattered, HW.![]()
It's your own fault for having such an erotic profile pic.![]()

Oh, yeah. I stalk.
Buuuuot not for any of the listed reasons.
My lit participation has been spotty the last couple of years. It seems like every single time I log in the PG is in the middle of some flame-war style drama, which to my untutored eye never makes any sense. I post stalk to educate myself. (It still usually makes no sense but at least I have some idea of what people are throwing fits about.)
I have also, in the past, post-stalked potential playmates for a friend. She only had Lit access through her phone, so vetting partners via posts was tricky. (That reads back super creepy, but it wasn't. I swear!)
Hmmm. Ya know, I lie. I've also engaged in the 1.5 option. Twice maybe, for an attraction. That would be over six+ years.
"Cause I am just so wild and crazy.![]()
I’m like this too. I let myself go to a level 3 for 1 day. Then I reined it back in.
I sometimes post stalk if someone has changed their avatar. That totally throws me off. So to figure out who it is, sometimes I’ll look at their posts.

I don't really post stalk much. I find it to be a lot of work to look at someone's post history and then click to figure out which thread they were in, who they were replying to, who that person was replying to and I confuse myself because it is in backwards order.
It very well may be that I'm not smart enough to post stalk.
I did find myself at a level 3 once and it was the ickiest feeling of my whole time at Lit.
So I would say my normal is a 0.5
I’m like this too. I let myself go to a level 3 for 1 day. Then I reined it back in.
I sometimes post stalk if someone has changed their avatar. That totally throws me off. So to figure out who it is, sometimes I’ll look at their posts.