Leahaven

As I just stated in a DM, my lifestyle has exceeded my willingness to discuss it publicly. I know that's weird.
That's not weird at all, the most interesting thing about this thread and your experiences has been your openness. I've often felt happy that people can find partners to share this sort of life style with, its been a very inspiring and uplifting journey to read about.

If this thread makes you uncomfortable, I think you could ask a mod to simply lock it. Then it will quietly vanish, but still be here for you to refer to.
You could always then make a new different thread, in which you share less, but could still use to discuss things. Just an idea .
 
As I just stated in a DM, my lifestyle has exceeded my willingness to discuss it publicly. I know that's weird.
You must do as you think best, but as an interested follower of your sexual journey, I found your postings fascinating. I enjoyed following your evolution from a frustrated wife to an extremely sexually liberated woman. As a cuckolded husband myself, I can relate to Robbie's subordinate status and in his willingness to assist you in your sexual adventures with other men.
Most of the comments on this thread have been supportive of your choices and it pains me to think that you will no longer share your experiences with us here on Literotica.
 
I am getting a lot of requests for updates and more than a few have suggested that I start my own thread. I am nervous about doing this, but I will give it a try. I hope I am posting this in the right forum, and for those who are wondering, "Who's Leahaven?" Here is some backstory. I will also cut and paste some past posts of mine to help people understand what is going on. And once again, I want to say "thank you" to those who have provided advice. You already know that my marriage would still be in the dysfunctional zone if it were not for you.

My name is Leah. I am 28 years old, and Robbie (not his real name) and I have been married for about 3 years. I joined Lit on Sep 26, 2023. I had been lurking in the forums for a few months by then, reading about sexual things I never could have imagined. Robbie and I are from a rural, sparsely-populated county, and both of us have very, very conservative parents. We met in the 6th grade, and we have been best friends ever since, mostly because our parents are so similar. We were always taught that sex was sinful, and so we avoided it and everything about it. Then we got married. Suffice it to say, our sex life was clumsy, to put it mildly. Over time, it made our relationship so awkward that I began to wonder if we should even be married. Then, by pure chance, I found Literotica, and I began to read posts describing things that sounded just like Robbie. I was like, "WTF? Other guys do this?"

At this point, everything has changed. I will cut and paste some of my past comments, so you know where we are now, and then I will continue to update this thread as often as possible.

I hope it is ok if I do this. Someone please tell me if I am "out of bounds" or something.
I’ve followed your first posts awhile back but I am not on here much anymore so I don’t remember all the updates. Life has kept me from this forum.

That being said, if I were single and I flirted with you and you flirted back and we had a vibe, I would probably go all the way.

I would ask about your husband and if he is ok with it (I had a situation like this once and I actually knew the husband….another story for later perhaps). If you said he gave you his blessing, I would go for it. After having some incredible sex, I would then ask if he’d like to watch. And if you’d be ok with that.

You would probably struggle with an answer. I wouldn’t pressure you.

But, if you said yes, I would come up with a plan. Maybe one of those porn nights you had scheduled. I would show up while you’re naked and he is about to eat you out. You would come to the door in a robe. You’d let me in. I would come in to tell you I needed something for work.

I see you’re in a robe, he probably ran or is covered up. I see you’re watching porn and comment that your nipple is showing.

I sit down to watch and comment on the action on TV, maybe discuss what I like or don’t like. Maybe talk about the shot angles or the lives on the performers when they’re not on camera or hire the cameraman feels while watching.

You sit down next to me. You spread your legs to masterbate. I grab your hand and move it to my growing cock. I force you to rub outside of my pants. I unzip and move your hand to my cock having you masterbate me.

I look into your eyes and you know what comes next. I gently move your head towards my hard cock. You know you shouldn’t but you go along anyways. I reach over to finger your pussy. You shaved it just before I came over so I’m feeling how smooth it is.

Your husband is going crazy and we hear a noise in the bedroom. I ask what that was, knowing it’s him. You call him out and he comes. He is still naked. I stand up. You get me undressed in front of him.

You get on your knees to suck me while you look at him. I watch him to see what he does (in case he goes crazy). Next, I look down at you. You look up at me and you continue to suck me as we lock eyes.

Should I continue?
 
I’ve followed your first posts awhile back but I am not on here much anymore so I don’t remember all the updates. Life has kept me from this forum.

That being said, if I were single and I flirted with you and you flirted back and we had a vibe, I would probably go all the way.

I would ask about your husband and if he is ok with it (I had a situation like this once and I actually knew the husband….another story for later perhaps). If you said he gave you his blessing, I would go for it. After having some incredible sex, I would then ask if he’d like to watch. And if you’d be ok with that.

You would probably struggle with an answer. I wouldn’t pressure you.

But, if you said yes, I would come up with a plan. Maybe one of those porn nights you had scheduled. I would show up while you’re naked and he is about to eat you out. You would come to the door in a robe. You’d let me in. I would come in to tell you I needed something for work.

I see you’re in a robe, he probably ran or is covered up. I see you’re watching porn and comment that your nipple is showing.

I sit down to watch and comment on the action on TV, maybe discuss what I like or don’t like. Maybe talk about the shot angles or the lives on the performers when they’re not on camera or hire the cameraman feels while watching.

You sit down next to me. You spread your legs to masterbate. I grab your hand and move it to my growing cock. I force you to rub outside of my pants. I unzip and move your hand to my cock having you masterbate me.

I look into your eyes and you know what comes next. I gently move your head towards my hard cock. You know you shouldn’t but you go along anyways. I reach over to finger your pussy. You shaved it just before I came over so I’m feeling how smooth it is.

Your husband is going crazy and we hear a noise in the bedroom. I ask what that was, knowing it’s him. You call him out and he comes. He is still naked. I stand up. You get me undressed in front of him.

You get on your knees to suck me while you look at him. I watch him to see what he does (in case he goes crazy). Next, I look down at you. You look up at me and you continue to suck me as we lock eyes.

Should I continue?
Oh gosh, thank you for such an engaging post.

Should you continue? Well, I very much appreciate your writing, but to be honest, I never really meant for this thread to host erotica. It's been more about me rambling about my husband and me (stumbling about and) finding our way. But I do thank you for contributing.
 
Oh gosh, thank you for such an engaging post.

Should you continue? Well, I very much appreciate your writing, but to be honest, I never really meant for this thread to host erotica. It's been more about me rambling about my husband and me (stumbling about and) finding our way. But I do thank you for contributing.
Once again, you manage to hold your boundaries in the most kind, clear and unequivocal way.
As if we weren't all already impressed by your clarity, intelligence and self possession. Not that you are trying to prove anything here. It's just very obviously who you are.
 
Once again, you manage to hold your boundaries in the most kind, clear and unequivocal way.
As if we weren't all already impressed by your clarity, intelligence and self possession. Not that you are trying to prove anything here. It's just very obviously who you are.
Thank you, cascadiabound, but I could say the same things about you. You and the others who have contributed to this thread have always been candid but tolerant and understanding. You have all managed to be truthful with me without hurting my feelings, even though my naivete, I am sure, has, at times, been difficult to navigate. It's like somehow, by some stroke of luck, I happened upon a little bright spot of caring in an otherwise uncaring world....in - of all places - an anonymous, online forum.

I will never forget this thread. I will never forget all the varied personalities that have shined through, stuck it out, and come back, time and time again, to provide me with their guidance. As you all know, it has literally been life-changing.

So let me tell you something.

On Saturday, October 18, Alex came to stay with us. He has done this several times now, but this time, he didn't leave until kind of late Sunday evening, he and I sharing a long hug at the front door. I was tired (from lack of sleep), and so Robbie and I went straight to bed. We lay down facing each other, and as everything grew quiet, we were just looking at each other. Without words, we were sharing an intimacy around what had happened that weekend that others could never understand or approve. The sexual tension, that by then should have been totally and completely exhausted, was still immense, and we looked at each other as if we were asking, "Is it ok that we are still so aroused?"

Robbie said, "What happened?"

I thought he meant, "what just happened," but that wasn't his tone, so I asked, "What do you mean?"

"What changed?" he said. "What made you decide to lead us into all this?"

I thought about these forums. I thought about this thread. But I couldn't tell him about this place.

"It wasn't all me, Robbie. You've been trying to tell me to just be who I want to be for a very long time."

"Yeah," he replied, "but that doesn't matter if I can't do it without being insulting. It's because of you that we live in this house, Leah. It's because of you that I can do my project cars. It's because of you that our marriage got turned around. You really are 'the boss.'"

I kind of chuckled, and said, "Yeah, a very strict boss."

"You know, when it's happening sometimes I don't want to do what you say and I get all upset about it, and then I realize what's actually happening. 'My wife is my total, fucking boss.' And then I love it." He looked at me to reinforce what he was saying, and I smiled at him. "So what changed in you?" he added.

"I started researching things, trying to figure out what it was you actually wanted."

"YOU did?"

I laughed. "Yes, I did. The girl who was taught to stay away from sex."

As it occurred to him that I had been reading up on things like "cuckold," Robbie kind of blushed. Then he asked me why I changed my mind.

"I didn't change my mind," I said. "I read comments in some forums that made me realize that I wasn't being who I wanted to be. I realized that all along, you knew me better than I did."

Robbie reached across and took my hand.

"So see," he said, "you lead us here, Leah. You really are 'the boss.'"

"I am the boss, Robbie," I said, and I squeezed his hand. "Now go to sleep."
 
love that the 2 of you are talking and accepting what you both want and need.
your update is well said, I do miss your post I have to admit
 
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