lame but funny pickup lines

[cyberking001]

ok guys and gals, let's have your lamest and funniest
pickup lines ... hopefully ones that will make us laugh ...
but that you would NEVER use ... or have you had them
used on you already???

here a some to get you started:

nice legs ... what time do they open?

are you from tennessee? (why?) because you're the only ten i see here.

my name is sam ... remember it ... you'll be screaming it later.

can i borrow 50 cents? (why?) i want to phone my mom to tell her
i just met the perfect girl (or guy).

are you from jamaica? (why?) because jamaica my pants too tight ...

 

[semen4her]

Does your mother know you're on her computer?

 

[Bert Notorius]

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_go9gQ8aKqFc/S7dzArqc4vI/AAAAAAAAASg/nJZoUgxX04c/s1600/playground.jpg

 

[Cade Is Here]

Does your mother know you're on her computer?

Is that what you are always told?

 

[semen4her]

Is that what you are always told?

No, I'm told you are a white trash racist loser.

Judging by your threads what I'm told is true.

 

[cyberking001]

???

what the hell ... 4 replies in and already we are tossing
bombs at one another???

let me put on my sunglasses ... i am blinded by your beauty

in case you wake up first tomorrow morning ...
i like my eggs over easy.

<guy> hey baby, how do you like your eggs?
<girl> unfertilized!!!

<guy> hey baby, what's your phone number?
<girl> it's in the book
<guy> what's your name?
<girl> that's in the book, too!

 

[John Doe]

If I said you have a beatiful body would you take off your pants and dance around a little?

 

[kiwi_submissive]

Do you want to play a game called Titanic? When I say iceburg, you go down.

 

[Cade Is Here]

No, I'm told you are a white trash racist loser.

There ya go making racist assumptions again.. Go look in the mirror son. I think you and rory would make the perfect couple. You both hate whitey and probably you might join in one of his circlejerk parties I bet.

 

[mynameisben]

Is that the Titanic in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?

 

[Brock2011]

Is your father a terrorist cos your the bomb(Never Dissapoints)Lol

The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor

If I flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances are of getting head

Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package

You must be a high jumper, because you make my bar rise

Do you live on a chicken farm? (No) You sure know how to raise cocks

Try these and you will DEFINITELY GET SOME PUSSY!!!

 

[Joeybagadonuts]

Let's play carnival; sit on my face and I'll guess your weight.

 

[mynameisben]

My what big lips you have! The better for me to eat your pussy with.

 

[mynameisben]

You must smoke a lot of cigarettes or something. Because your camel toe is humping my brane.

 

[semen4her]

There ya go making racist assumptions again.. Go look in the mirror son. I think you and rory would make the perfect couple. You both hate whitey and probably you might join in one of his circlejerk parties I bet.

No assumptions necessary.

Your threads are all the proof anyone needs to know you are a racist trailer boy.

 

[pellso27]

my dog loves you

 

[redheadedtxn]

I want to dig my high heeled boot into your balls.

(never works, oddly enough)

 

[Joeybagadonuts]

I want to dig my high heeled boot into your balls.

(never works, oddly enough)

go figure.

Merry Christmas, Tex.

 

[mynameisben]

Your nickname must be Hershey's Kiss, right? Because every time you walk by I drop a little dollop of something in my pants.

 

[redheadedtxn]

go figure.

Merry Christmas, Tex.

hey bud! Merry Christmas to you and yours!

 

[overthebow]

I want to dig my high heeled boot into your balls.

(never works, oddly enough)

Yeah I know.

"Hey lady, wanna fuck?" doesn't work that well for me either.

 

[AngusMan]

"No, thats not a gun in my pocket. But if it were, it would be a howitzer."

 

[kiwi_submissive]

Is that a ladder in your pantyhose or is it the stairway to heaven?

Have you ever tripped over a branch? no? Well how about a root?

 

[philosophygirl]

"let's go back to my place and do things I'm going to tell everyone we did anyway."

 

[eyer]

What time do you have to be back in heaven?