Lady Bashirah, Chapter 2

[Le Jacquelope]

The draft is online here at my website. You'll find Chapter 1, and the RTF versions of these stories as well (for offline reading).

It's a biggie. I'm thinking of cutting it into two parts, but I can't find a proper place to split it.

Any ideas?
What do ya think so far?

 

[Le Jacquelope]

What I meant was, if someone could gander a looksee and tell me what ya think so I can edit it before I post this story to Lit

 

[Le Jacquelope]

Hmmm.. pushing this back up... I wonder if I got on a lot of people's iggy??

 

[hiddenself]

Maybe...

In general, this is a forum for feedback on POSTED stories. You might want to solicit the help of an editor privately or at the Editor's Forum. Personally, I don't do outside websites.

 

[Le Jacquelope]

Re: Maybe...

In general, this is a forum for feedback on POSTED stories. You might want to solicit the help of an editor privately or at the Editor's Forum. Personally, I don't do outside websites.

Ick, it's insanely confusing to tell where to put these things.

I intend to submit this story to Lit, but first I wanted to polish this baby. It's a bit late for feedback once it's submitted and the votes are coming in

 

[hiddenself]

How true!

It's a bit late for feedback once it's submitted and the votes are coming in

Right on. If one's really serious about it, before (posting, publishing, whatever) is definitely the time to do it.

 

[English Lady]

well i had a little gander at chapter 2 and i couldn't really see a natural place to split it,i think it flows well as one chapter even though it is fairly long

 

[Le Jacquelope]

well i had a little gander at chapter 2 and i couldn't really see a natural place to split it,i think it flows well as one chapter even though it is fairly long

Well I guess I should submit it because no one has said if there were any annoyances or faults in it.

Or is it so boring that nobody's interested in reading??

(I guess Lit's time as an erotic story board is long, looooong past?)